I wake up butt naked with my face pressed into a flattened pillow. My mouth is dry, and I feel the wind gently caressing my back. For a few seconds, I have no clue where the hell I am. My limbs are dead asleep and my brain’s still booting up, so I just lie there like an idiot.
Then I realize I’m not alone. From across the room comes this slow, heavy breathing. I turn my head slowly and see Ivan sprawled on his back, totally out and fully exposed to the morning light. I try to focus my eyes and I see his hair covering his face. He has one hand behind his head, and he’s exposing a dark bush in his armpit to the room. I watch his chest rise and fall in perfect rhythm. Even asleep, he looks like he’s about to spring up and leap across the room. My eyes drift down his body, and I notice his semi-hard penis resting on his thigh, and for some reason it looks like it’s winking at me.
This sight makes me realize that this exact shit is what I used to jerk off to back home. The idea of waking up in some busted shared room with another guy’s dick in my face only ever existed in porn. But now I’m actually living it and it doesn’t feel like lightning or destiny or whatever the hell I imagined. It just feels right and normal. And somehow stupidly natural.
I can practically feel my brain rearranging itself, deleting whatever old prudish bullshit I grew up with and replacing it with the sense that I, that we, have nothing to hide and nothing to be ashamed of. That I’m just… home. A part of this brotherhood.
This realization brings back the memory of yesterday. Thinking of it as my initiation feels so stupid, but that’s exactly the reason why I smile now just thinking about it. Then the actual events hit me in the skull all at once: the couch, the bowl, the taste of us. The fact that I actually did that.
I stay lying there, motionless, for a bit longer, mortified with embarrassment. I try to remember what happened after I swallowed the contents of the bowl, but I can’t. The memory just stops.
I give up on my head and just push myself upright with this slow, resigned effort. My hair is probably mashed to one side, and I blink at nothing, trying to remember why I’m even awake. As I put my feet down off the bed, I feel this weird tightness between my legs and realize that even though my brain is loading slowly as fuck, my morning wood is at full power. It takes me a few seconds to understand that I desperately need to piss and that my bladder is actually the only thing dragging me out of bed.
I stand up and steady myself. I check whether I’m disturbing Ivan’s peace. Luckily, he doesn’t budge. He looks like some grotesque marble statue abandoned in the basement of a shitty museum. I glance around for my clothes but don’t see any, so I fuck it and step through the doorframe into the kitchen. I aim straight to the bathroom. I rub my eyes in a hopeless attempt to wake up a little more. Maybe a proper slap would do the charm.
I turn the corner to the bathroom, expecting the quiet stillness of an empty room, but I walk straight into JD instead. My dick literally pokes into his hip. I immediately jerk backward as if I just touched a hot stove. He’s standing at the sink with a razor in his hand and shaving cream spread over his neck. I let out this surprised, half-awake Hi babble sound, and he throws one back while giving me a quick look over. Instinctively I cover myself with my hands, mumbling an apology and saying I’ll wait till he’s done. He just laughs nonchalantly and tells me to come in, not to bother, to do whatever I came here to do.
I step inside hesitantly, trying not to make eye contact, trying to act normal even though my every cell is still buzzing with sleep and embarrassment. JD’s frame is firm and confident, and I feel like an intruder. I push myself through the space behind him and I notice his trunks hanging low, exposing the hair on his lower back and the top of his ass crack.
I position myself in front of the toilet bowl and start praying for my dick to work. I catch JD’s eyes in the mirror reflection, and he nonchalantly asks how I slept. I say something—fine, maybe good, or some mashed-up version of the two. I don’t even know. He just smiles and nods.
I focus on my dick again, but the hard little guy is living his own adventure. He acts as if he wasn’t even growing out of my crotch. I try to aim him but nothing comes out. I try to push the piss out, I feel stupid as fuck, because even you know how that does nothing at all. I breathe in, breathe out, whisper a prayer to every god I never believed in. Then, the weakest, saddest little stream sputters out like a dying lawn sprinkler. The first couple of droplets hit the floor at first and I wish the trap door opened under me. I cuss under my nose and then manage to aim these uneven, traitorous beats into the bowl. I have to concentrate so hard that it feels like I’m solving a calculus problem with my junk in front of the whole classroom.
JD keeps shaving, just talking away about something I can’t catch a single word of. I nod and smile like an idiot, pretending I’m listening, even though I’m basically fighting for my dignity over the toilet bowl. This stream is so lame, frustrating, embarrassing, and my face feels hot enough to fry eggs on.
Every time my dick hiccups or I miss the bowl, JD whistles the change in the rhythm and it sounds as if we were performing some kind of urinary duet. I start laughing under my breath because this is definitely the dumbest moment of my entire existence. Here I am, a proper-dude-wanna-be, struggling like a little boy who pees by himself for the first time.
Luckily, JD doesn’t look over. He wipes his neck clean and then, out of nowhere, he asks if I’ll be ready in fifteen minutes. As I’m squeezing out the last drops of piss out of my cock, I realize he was probably having an actual conversation with me the whole time. I mutter sorry what, which sounds exactly as pathetic as it feels, and he gives me this chill older-brother smile. He says he was talking about going to the carwash, and that I seemed pretty excited about it. He asks again if fifteen minutes works for me.
I tell him Yes, obviously yes, because at this point I’d agree to join the Navy if it meant escaping this moment. I look down and see my cock softening after emptying itself and say apologetically Well, this battle was lost before it started. JD laughs and says that I fought bravely. I say Sorry but JD waves with his hand and says not to stress about it. I flush the golden liquid away and as I step to the sink and in front of the mirror I look at my reflection. I still have the cock drawn on my fucking forehead. It is smeared a bit, fading. I look so dumb, my hair sticks everywhere and I need to shave those embarrassing spots that say You are a man but not quite. JD pats me on the shoulder on his way out, all casual and collected, whistling that weird piss melody again.
I wet my hand and start washing my forehead furiously but the marker has soaked deep into my skin. I can still see the shadow of a massive dick with cum shooting there. A soap doesn’t help either.
So I rather start brushing my teeth instead. I peek out of the bathroom with toothpaste foam dripping off my lip, and see JD rifling through his drawers, sniffing his clothes to know which ones are wearable. He takes his trunks down and I watch his flaccid penis bounce from side to side. It hypnotizes me. I start feeling my own cock getting hard again, but I try to suppress it. I can’t be this horny all the time. I need to behave, I need to grow up.
JD doesn’t notice me staring until he puts a clean boxer briefs on and glances back. I flinch so fast I nearly choke on toothpaste. I retreat into the bathroom in a second and I look at my reflection in the mirror again. So this is what a pervert actually looks like. Then I hear JD whistling the piss melody again.
