Long Road to Submission

Trey didn’t see Hunter in the week after their encounter in the apartment. He was intentionally avoiding him. At least, that’s what he told himself. After all, his apartment needed more furniture and he needed to familiarize himself with the layout of the campus and his car had to get new tires. But if he was honest with himself he knew that there were deeper reasons for this obsessive behavior. Their encounter had shaken Trey, besides feeling amazing it had caused him to realize that he’d never had a chance to form a concrete self-identity before. In Utah his family had always stressed the importance of the family unit, making sure the house was running and that everyone’s needs were meant. Usually as a detriment to himself.

 Being the oldest of five siblings he felt this strain acutely. By the time he was five, he knew how to change a diaper better than his aunts, and by fourteen he had more cooking knowledge than most men ever learn. Hell, he’d almost not even take the BMU scholarship because he wasn’t sure if the rest of his family would be able to function without him. But he knew that sooner or later he and the rest of his family would need some space, so he took the opportunity and moved. And less than 24 hours in he’d had an experience so intense that it made him rethink who he was. 

That final match with the sweat. Him going to Hunter's apartment even though he knew what would probably happen. The wet warmth of him on his dick. The ropes of cum squirting down his throat and crusting his face. It was so intense, he’d never felt pleasure like that before. 

But despite that every time he thought of Hunter his pulse quickened and his breath went shallow. Not an ideal state of mind to be in. During practice they were friendly enough. After the tournament on the first day, everyone was divided into weight classes for exercises so they never competed directly against each other, though it was obvious they were the best on the team. Hunter tried to make eye contact during the exercises and after practice. Being already comfortable in his sexuality he probably was waiting for Trey to break the ice, which was reasonable. Trey just wasn’t sure if he’d drown by doing so. 

He began using the weight room at off-hours, late at night or early in the morning, or when everyone else would be having class. And when he wasn’t in class or at practice he was often in his apartment memorizing muscles and tenders for his anatomy classes or becoming intimately familiar with the filmography of Jean-Luc Godard for his French cinema course. There was simply too much going on to even consider… whatever it was with Hunter.

Ten days after the initial encounter Trey was finishing up in the weight room early in the morning when he heard the door open. The room was positioned so that you had to round a corner before coming into the room properly. He completed the last squat, sat the bar on the rack, and began unloading the weights. His thighs burned from the routine today but he enjoyed the feeling. He flipped the bottom of his tank top to his eyes to wipe the sweat away after the last plate was hanging in its proper place.

“What happened to having a spotter?” A familiar voice called out. Trey immediately dropped his shirt. Hunter carried a duffel in one hand and a water bottle in another. His crop top ended just after his pecs and his shorts barely covered half of his thighs. Trey couldn’t figure out where to look first, even his eyes, that deep forest green, were completely captivating. 

It was at that moment Trey realized he had a lot of shit to work through.

Hunter sat down the duffel and the water bottle and crossed to the weight rack next to Treys.

“This where you’ve been sliding off to when you aren’t at practice?”

“Classes have been a lot, I don’t want to fall behind.” Trey felt stupid as he said it, the teachers knew he was an athlete, and he knew they’d give him a pass no matter what. He still wanted to try though.

“You need a tutor?” Hunter replied. He began sliding the plates onto the bar for a bench.

“No,” Trey said quickly, then he caught himself when Hunter looked at him, “I’m doing fine. Thanks for the offer though.”

Hunter finished setting up the plates and slid onto the bench. “Spot me?”

Trey didn’t respond but moved to the front of the bench and lightly rested his fingers on the bar. Hunter was fine on his own though, his muscles rippled as he pumped the bar up and down but he was golden the whole time. After seven reps he let the bar fall onto its rests and slid out from under it. He sat up and looked at Trey, who hadn’t taken his eyes off him since he’d started lifting. “What?” he asked.

“Nothing. It’s all good.” Trey replied.

“Sure it is. I totally believe you.” Hunter said, sarcasm dripping.

“Dude! I can’t just be normal after–” Trey stopped himself before he could go any further. Hunter raised an eyebrow, a smile played at his lips.

“After what?” He asked.

“After…” Trey struggled to find the proper innuendo. “After you showed me those moves.”

“Trey, let’s cut the bullshit.” Hunter took a drink from his water bottle. “We’re teammates first and foremost. I’d also think it’d be pretty good if we could be friends. And only after that will I be the guy that sucks your dick” He took another drink. “If that’s what you’re into of course.”

“I’m not gay I already told you that.”

“Then why,” Hunter walked up to Trey, mere inches between them, “can you not so much as look at me without getting hard?” Hunter looked down and Trey followed his gaze. His shorts were bulging so tight he felt the fabric would rip, his dick throbbed with desire.

Hunter reached out and wrapped his fingers around the bulge. Trey felt the pulsing intensify. The contact was almost painful, yet he yearned for more. He let out a soft moan, which Hunter took as a go-ahead and began massaging his dick through the shorts. Trey wasn’t sure if it was the fact that he’d never done anything sexual, if it was that Hunter was obviously so extremely experienced, or that he was just attracted to him, but the sensation of his dick being played with by someone else drove him insane. 

He began thrusting into Hunter's hand, slowly, giving time to let the pressure and friction build. Hunter looked up into his face, Trey had about eight inches on him but Hunter’s desire to take the active role dispelled any power imbalance. He felt Hunter's hand tighten around his cock and he picked up speed, fucking his hand through the fabric. 

“Dude how are you so good at this I’m about to bust.” Trey choked out.

“Well don’t do it in your pants, here.” With his free hand, Hunter lowered Trey’s waistband until his cock popped out. He resumed stroking as he dropped to his knees. He released the hand that had been jacking Trey off and prepared to take him into his mouth.

Then the door to the weight room opened. Footsteps approached. Hunter shot to his feet as Trey pulled his shorts up and tucked his throbbing dick into the waistband of his underwear. The fine line between pleasure and pain tipped definitively towards the latter, and Trey walked back against the wall to stop the stinging in his crotch. Hunter took a quick seat at the weight bench just as Coach rounded the corner.

“As I live and breathe gentleman!” He said, swinging his arms out to the side. “Getting that grind on before the sun has risen! Very good stuff, that's a great example.”

“I’m a light sleeper, it just helps to get the day started,” Trey said by way of excuse. Even though none was required.

“I don’t care if you’re a damn insomniac, so long as you keep fit and place well at competitions.” Coach crossed to the other side of the weight room, where a doorway led to the back side of the building where the offices were located. “Keep up the good work men. Don’t tire yourself out before practice this afternoon.” Then Coach exited through the door and Trey and Hunter were alone again.

Trey's erection had diminished with the stress of the near miss. Hunter looked at him. “My place, tonight?”

Trey considered. His mind was racing at a million miles a minute. “We’ll see.”

---

The campus therapist was free with Trey’s full-ride scholarship. After his French Cinema lecture, he stopped by the offices the hour before wrestling practice. The counselor was a short woman in her mid-30s named Marissa who regarded Trey warmly, if not impersonally. He sat on the couch, which was meant for someone about six inches smaller than him, and faced Marissa in the chair. 

“So, Trey, it says here you’re studying Sports Medicine, with a minor in Film, and you have a full-ride wrestling scholarship. That sounds like a lot. How are you doing?”

“It’s going alright.” Trey now realized that this visit to the counselor had been a whim, and he actually had very little experience talking about himself, much less his feelings. He decided to not say anything else.

“Could you be a little more specific? Is something bothering you?”

“I’m fucking my teammate.” The sentence flew out without any conscious thought and Trey immediately shut his mouth and turned a bright shade of crimson that contrasted nicely with his blonde hair. Since he didn’t have any experience opening up to people his first instinct was to tell the truth. To her credit, Marissa did not appear phased, but she did write on her notepad for quite a long time. Trey suddenly wondered whether this would get him in trouble. “This is confidential right, you don’t have to report anything unless I’m, like, sick in the head right?”

“That’s an outdated term but yes. Unless you are a danger to yourself or others this stays between us.” She paused, “Is this relationship consensual?”

“Yeah, I mean he’s definitely consenting.”

“And you, do you want whatever has been happening?” There was no judgment behind her eyes, so Trey felt more comfortable opening up.

“I don’t know. I mean, yes I give consent when we're doing it but– I mean I’ve never done anything with anyone ever and so it’s a little overwhelming.”

“That’s understandable. Have you ever considered your sexuality before?”

“No.”

“And your teammate… is it him that arouses you or the activity itself?”

Trey considered this. “Can I speak frankly?”

“That’s my job, Trey, you should feel comfortable saying whatever you need to.”

“Well then, he gets me really hard. Like before we even do anything if we’re just hanging around, I get excited. And yeah, he’s conventionally extremely good-looking. And when he moves to do anything my body is just screaming at me ‘yes, fuck this guy’ and so I do it.” Even at the description, Trey felt his bulge growing, so he shifted positions and stopped talking. Marissa made a few more notes on her paper and then looked up at him.

“Trey, it appears, from what you’ve told me, that you’re attracted to your teammate. If not emotionally or romantically at least sexually. Now, college is a time when a lot of people tend to experiment with their bodies. So, just because you enjoy sexual activity with him, doesn’t mean you should feel the need to call yourself gay or bisexual or to apply any other label until you’ve done some more self-reflection at your own pace. Have you confided any of this to him?”

“I kinda get freaked out and leave after it’s over,” Trey admitted.

“Well then, next time you’re together I suggest telling him how you feel, even if you don’t do anything then.” Marissa wrote a few more things down and looked up from her board. “I’m sorry Trey but that’s about all the time I can spare today. I’d be happy to have you back if you want to schedule an appointment with my receptionist. Additionally, we have free condoms and lube in a bowl by the door, make sure you’re being safe.”

The whole conversation left Trey’s head spinning. He recognized the truth in what Marissa had said. It was easier to admit that he enjoyed sex with Hunter. But the labeling conversation… he knew his whole life would change if he discovered he was gay or bisexual or queer. The way he’d navigate in the world would be different, as a man and as a wrestler. He sat down on a bench by the student union and took long, deep breaths, trying to keep some unnamable sense of terror at bay.

---

He thought wrestling practice would clear his head. In reality, it was the opposite. With every suicide run, with every diamond pushup completed his mind kept honing in on the hunter situation. He stumbled on the agility drills and tapped out first on the strength tests. And all around had a shitty practice. His team must have sensed something was up and didn’t push it. Dimitrius gave him a pat on the back, and Liam helped him up after he fell from the dead hang bar after an embarrassing twenty seconds. He couldn’t bring himself to meet Hunter’s gaze, but he felt him staring at him when he wasn’t looking. By the end of the practice, he was tired and dejected. Coach asked him to stay after practice. 

“What’s going on Trey? You were on fire last week and this– pardon my French– was shit.”

“I know Coach,” Trey said through tired breaths. “There’s just some stuff I’m working through right now and I let it get to me during practice. It won’t happen again.”

“Well, I won’t say it better not, because I don’t believe in that kind of pressure.” Coach stood and walked to Trey. “But for your own sake, not just as a wrestler but as a student here and as a person trying to become the best they can be, I’d advise you to work through it.”

Trey left and headed straight to his apartment. He’d found some cheap posters at Walmart to hang on his walls so now the place had some character to it. Unfortunately, that character was a stereotypical college wrestler. It depressed Trey when he entered. In a little over two weeks, he’d been confronted with the fact that he had no idea who he was while also being introduced to a side of himself that scared the shit out of him. It was all a lot. He decided to call his mom.

They’d talked twice since he’d arrived on campus. Both had been about the blown tire and insurance money and as such they had not had a chance to catch up. Before he left Trey would have said he had a close relationship with his mother. Now he was questioning whether their relationship had any weight at all. He hoped the call would straighten things out. She picked up on the second ring.

“Is everything okay Trey?” The concern in her voice was palpable.

“I’m doing fine Mom. I just wanted to talk.”

“Oh. Well, then how did the move go? They give you a nice place?”

“Yeah it’s fine, it smelled like cat urine for a bit but I Febrezed it.”

Trey’s mom made a sound of revulsion. “That smell always made me vomit I hope you’re alright”

“I am. The wrestling team is nice, getting along well with them, and classes are good too.”

“That’s great! Feeling homesick?”

“Sometimes.” Trey didn’t know if that’s really how he felt but he knew his mom would like to hear that.

“Well don’t get too lonely. Some kids, you know, they go to college, away from everything they’ve known, and it changes them! It’s scary stuff for a parent. But I’m glad you’re doing okay.” Muffled voices rose in the background, Trey couldn’t make them out. “Stay my little boy okay? I’ve got to go, I’ll set up a Skype call so your brothers and sisters can see you.”

“Sounds good.” Trey’s voice caught in his throat. “Bye.” He hung up as the first tear slid down his face.

---

An hour later he was knocking on Hunter’s door. He had sat on it and realized that since no one else knew about his situation there was no one else he could confide in. He considered leaving, maybe talking to Marissa tomorrow, but before he could move Hunter opened the door, wearing a baggy hoodie and shorts. He smiled and was about to say something before he saw the tear stains on Trey’s face.

“Shit. Come in sit down dude.” He ushered Trey in, who sat down on the couch and buried his head in his hands. The tears wouldn’t come but the action itself brought relief. He felt the weight of Trey sitting next to him on the couch, a moment later he wrapped his arm around Trey in a bro hug. “Hey, hey, look at me.”

Trey looked up and nearly fell to pieces. Hunter’s gaze was pure empathy. There was no judgment, no expectation, he knew that if he asked Hunter would let him stay as long as he needed. This was what he needed. He sniffled, wiping his snot with his sleeve.

“There’s just been a lot going on. And… I’ve never had to deal with anything before.”

Hunter turned to better face Trey, who also turned and was immediately drawn to the stubble lining his chin. His perfect ginger stubble. God, he was perfect. That was all it took for Trey to accept the truth, a little bit of facial hair he couldn’t stop staring at. 

“I think I’m gay. Or, like, not straight.”

Hunter smiled and squeezed his shoulder. “I’m happy for you Trey.”

“It was just… I had just moved and was finally independent and then my life was going to change again because of that and you’re so attractive it was distracting and–” He stopped when Trey put his hand on his leg.

“I get it, I really truly get it. I had to go through the same thing.” He said. “And it felt like drowning in nothing for the longest time.”

“And how did you stop feeling like you were drowning?”

“I realized that there was nothing to drown in.”

Trey took that in for a moment. His breathing slowed, and his tears stopped coming. Normalcy was returning, bit by bit. There would be a way back to where he was, but better.

“Not to, like, be that guy but I figured from the first time. But I knew how it was when I was realizing I liked guys and the last thing I wanted was to be rushed on it.”

“So you would’ve just, what, let me suck your dick in private and ignore you in public until I came around?”

“Well, to be fair,” Trey scooted closer, “you have a really nice dick, I would’ve made do.”

They were inches apart, Trey looking down at Hunter, Hunter looking up at Trey. No nudity yet the most tension they’d shared yet.

“I want to kiss you,” Trey whispered.

“So do it.”

Trey lowered himself into Hunter and their lips met. Tentative and searching. Trey didn’t feel like bringing up the fact that he’d never kissed anyone before. Much less a man, and much less his wrestling teammate, so he just went with it. Hunter tasted like strong mint and his stubble scratched Trey’s stubble in all the right ways. Their mouths moved together like they each had an itch that only the other could scratch. Soon enough they graduated to french kissing, Trey shoving his tongue down Hunter’s throat, eliciting moans of pleasure from both. They were hungry and they knew what they wanted. Wet met wet as their mouths opened more, devouring each other as if taking holy communion. 

Hunter detached himself from Trey for a moment, who felt confused for a second before Hunter stood and sat on Trey, straddling him and grinding into his dick as the kissing resumed. They explored every inch of each other, Trey went down on his neck, sucking and kissing and licking it until a hickey seemed inevitable. Every stimulus drove Hunter wild, moans escaped him at a constant rate whenever Trey’s mouth met against his skin. He grabbed Trey’s head and brought him in for another kiss, he lightly bit Trey’s lip and he returned the favor, more moans of pleasure escaped. 

“I want you naked right now,” Trey said in the beat their mouths were not attached. He could finally admit what he wanted, and what he wanted was Hunter naked and having sweaty, passionate sex with him.

Both shirts flew off their torsos. Trey ran his hands hungrily along Hunter’s stout, solid torso. He bent down and kissed his chest, exploring every divot and hair with his tongue. Hunter bent over him and did the same to his shoulder, they needed each other carnally, in the most extreme way either of them knew. Hunter began grinding his hips against Trey’s crotch, the bulge of his cock already standing at attention, rubbing at Hunter’s hole. He continued at this for a while, Hunter grinding on Trey as the two passionately made out, soon enough a thin layer of sweat had formed on both of them, Trey slicked his hair back with it and in response, Hunter lowered himself and licked Trey from navel to nose. 

“I wanna fuck you so badly.” Trey breathed, succumbing to his raw sexual urges.

“Fuck me then Trey,” Hunter breathed, “fuck me until I cum.”

He didn’t need to be told twice. Both of the men stood up and removed the rest of their clothing. Trey took a beat to size Hunter up, he was short but his cock wasn’t, only a little bit shorter than Trey’s with a nice trimmed bush around it. The whole body was nicely muscled with just the smallest bit of fat around it to pad. He laughed and picked Hunter up, who wrapped his arms around Trey’s neck as he carried him to bed.

“I want to ride you,” Hunter said after Trey had thrown him onto the mattress. With him looking up at Trey, gorgeous and small and already leaking precum. There was no way he could say no. Trey laid flat on his back as Hunter maneuvered into position, grinding Trey’s dick against his hole, Hunter let out a whimper, and a moan escaped Trey’s lips.

“You want this hole?” Hunter asked by way of both dirty talk and consent. There was no hesitation for Trey, he knew what he wanted, no, what he needed, and nodded enthusiastically. 

Hunter produced a bottle of lube from his sheets and smeared some on his hole and Trey’s dick. It felt warm and slick and made him shiver with anticipation. Then Hunter lowered himself until Trey’s dick was at the entrance to his hole. He squatted there for a moment, the warmth of his hole, calling to Trey, but he didn’t want to rush the moment either.

“Slow.” He whispered, and then Hunter gradually sat on Trey’s cock. His hole was warm and tight and perfect, his head penetrated and already he felt that the pinnacle of human experience had been opened to him. Hunter stayed there for a second, holding the tip inside him. He made eye contact with Trey and they both smiled, it felt good, it felt right.

Then he lowered some more until about three inches of Trey’s dick had penetrated Hunter, who took it like a champ smiling as it slid its way further up his hole. Trey couldn’t take it anymore, the pressure and pleasure too intense. He bucked his hips and slid balls deep into Hunter, who let out a high pitch moan as all seven inches of Trey entered his asshole.

“Fuck you feel so good,” Hunter said as he began bouncing up and down. His hole squished as the dick slid up and down. Trey grabbed the sheets, he felt as if he was about to finish but tried to hold it back. He opened his eyes and saw that Hunter’s dick was oozing precum onto his chest with a steady trickly.

“Are you close?” Trey asked through a moan. He knew he couldn’t hold back much longer.

“Shit Trey I’m about to bust.” And so Trey sat up and held Hunter as he rode him, their face pressed together, not kissing but looking deep into the eyes of the other as he bounced and the pressure grew, the sweat flying off them in drops, their bodies pressed together in a dance of desire that only had one outcome. Hunter's sounds of pleasure began to grow in duration and magnitude, Trey could feel Hunter’s cock grow rock hard against his chest even as he could feel the climax coursing its way through him.

“I’m cumming Hunter, it’s here.”

“Yeah, me too. GOD!” He yelled as his dick exploded ropes of cum over both of them as Trey let go and let his cock pump its load into Hunter’s ass, who gasped as he felt each rope of cum slide up his hole. They came for about ten seconds, it felt like the most powerful thing either of them had experienced. It was heaven on earth.

Trey slid out of Hunter once he felt himself getting soft, as he did the load he shot into Hunter came dribbling out onto him and the sheets. Hunter collapsed into Trey’s arms, not caring about the mess. They were both exhausted, covered in cum and sweat and piss, and it was more than either of them could have asked for. Trey felt no urge to run, all he wanted was to stay with Hunter in bed for the rest of the night.

And so that is what they did, after a quick shower together to dispose of the bodily fluids and a quick call to the carry-out Korean bbq place they settled into bed. Hunter fit nicely into the crook of Trey’s arm and the bed was big enough for both of them. They ate their food as Hunter pulled out his laptop and pulled up Minority Report and they stayed wrapped together until they fell asleep, not to untangle until the morning.