Jock in the House

“Jock in the House” 2020

TV show of the Year

 “Good evening ladies and gentlemen and welcome to a new and exciting series of `Jock in the House’.  You would have to have lived on another planet to have missed the new developments in the show this year, but we are going to start by explaining the new concept in its entirety.  And – as ever – it is you, the public at home, who get to decide who our winner will be in 13 weeks’ time.”

“In a moment, we will be introducing you to our 12 new hunky housemates, each one of them prime British beef boys who have the dream of winning the £10 million prize as the winner of `Jock in the House’.”

“Of course, the winner will have to survive 12 tasks that will test every aspect of their body and mind and hope that they stay out of the bottom two.  The bottom two contestants in the task each week will face the public vote.  And the loser will leave the Jock House every Friday evening.”

“Now here’s the twist that has got the nation buzzing.  All of our contestants have already signed a “Slavery Contract” and are legally the property of our television company.  The contract states that they can only be enslaved following a losing public vote and that the winner will be exempted from slavery, and return to freedom.”

“Every week, our hunky loser will leave the Jock House and lose his freedom.  Yes, that’s right ladies and gentleman.  You will get to see the losing jockboy stripped of his manhood and enslaved on our show every week.  Then, the highest bidder for our newly enslaved jock will get to take their slave away as owned property with immediate effect.  And – as an added bonus this year - every member of the public who votes for our loser to be evicted stands a chance of winning the third place slaveboy for themselves, legally owned by you for you to do as you wish with him.  Our live show every Friday night will show you the fate of losers in previous weeks as we go out and see our straight muscle jocks enslaved for the rest of their lives.”

“So eventually we will end up with two hunky finalists, one of whom will become rich beyond his wildest dreams, and the other who will become the exclusive slave property of the winner.”

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“It’s time to meet our contestants ladies and gentlemen.  It’s time to see our twelve hunky jockboys who will be entertaining us and putting their freedom on the line over the coming weeks.  Remember, as you meet them, to recognise the chance they are taking.  Only one of them can be the winner of “Jock in the House” and remain a free boy at the end of the series.  They are all here for the prestige of knowing that they are Britain’s finest jock boy.  But only one of them will claim that crown and remain a man.”

“So here is our first contestant.  Joey is 19 years old and a university graduate from Oxford University.  Joey is no dumb blond boy, studying Law at Oxford and captain of the Oxford University boat race crew last year.  As you can see, his chiselled body is honed to perfection and I think we can all see that his red wrestling singlet doesn’t hide the ample meat between his legs.  By the way ladies and gentlemen, our contestants are only given that skin tight singlet, they get no other possessions or clothes to take into the house with them.”

“There he goes, into the house.  The next time he leaves that house, he will either be £10 million richer, or a slaveboy.  And here comes our second contestant.  21 year old Alex is a professional rugby player in his hometown Leeds.  His massive frame shows his strength and look at the size of those legs, powerful and sculpted above his bare feet.  His blue singlet shows he isn’t the best endowed of our contestants, but he assures us that he knows how to use his equipment when entertaining the ladies.  In he goes, to meet his new buddy Joey.”

“Our contestants have never met each other before, so tonight will be an interesting experience for them.  Will be strange for them to talk to each other, knowing that the likelihood is their lives as free heterosexual jocks is over.”

“And here is contestant number three.  24 year old Brad is from the West Country, and one of Britain’s foremost surfers.   His trademark blond mop of hair will probably all be shaved off if he becomes a slave, but he intends to win.  He drew the short straw by wearing the white singlet, but you can see that his equipment is creditable and his upper torso is shown off to perfection in that singlet.  Look at that butt.  Nice equipment.”

“Contestant number four will feel right at home in his green singlet.  Matt is only 18 years of age and so will never experience adult life if he is enslaved.  He’s a junior wrestling champion and so is used to displaying his body like this.  Still, he knows there is plenty at stake and he looks a little overawed already.  All of our contestants entered this contest of their own free will, but Matt’s parents were very influential in making his mind up about entering “Jock in the House”.  It’s a big risk, as he’s up against some pretty smart and athletic jocks.  But someone has to win the big prize!  Looks like Matt is pretty scared as he climbs those steps.  Look at his bare legs shaking.  But in he goes.”

“Contestant number five is James.  James is Scotland’s foremost hope in the gymnastics event for the forthcoming Olympics.  There have been many attempts to prevent his entry into our house, but he was determined that he would give it a go and you can see that his small frame packs a beautifully honed body.  Will his agility and talent beat the raw power of some of our larger contestants, or is he maybe destined to a new life away from gymnastics as the property of one of our viewers ?”

“Will is our sixth contestant on “Jock in the House”.  Will is 22 years of age and a Royal Marine.  Only weeks ago, he was on active duty in the middle east but here he is now in his bright yellow singlet, showing off army beef at its best.  Will believes that his army training gives him an advantage over the other contestants, but there is already a rumour that he is destined for an Arab buyer if he doesn’t stay out of trouble.  In he goes.”

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Cut to shots of the house.  Will comes through the door and shakes hands awkwardly with his housemates, looking around at the luxurious living quarters that form the set.  Six hunky straight guys dressed in obscenely tight singlets walk around the room trying to act as manly and heterosexual as possible.  The outline of six pairs of genitals clear in the skin tight costumes that mark their new status as contestants on this risky game show.  Each of them painfully aware that losing to any of their housemates will mean they will never again taste freedom.

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Cut back to the host, continuing to shout excitedly as the remaining four contestants of “Jock in the House” are dropped off short of an excited audience.  Four more guys who have to walk through a crowd of thousands to reach the entrance to “their house” wearing only a simple singlet.  Kyle the 25 year old fireman, Dale the 20 year old owner of his own gym in central Newcastle, 22 year old Michael the amateur footballer and finally 19 year old unemployed Ricky who is a boxer in his hometown Coventry.

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The lights on the exit door turn to red, and the contestants are locked into their arena.  For the lucky ones, they have weeks of tournaments and tests to come in deciding who is the “Jock in the House”.  For the unlucky first loser, one of our jock boys is about to face a lifetime of slavery in only a few days.

“Join us tomorrow evening for the first instalment of life in the Jock house.  Good evening.”