In the mid nineties my mother died leaving her husband of forty years a widower on the verge of retirement. As I was still single it gave dad and I the chance to spend some quality time together. My mother was a strong woman who tended to dominate the things she and my dad did. So it was good to get to know him for the person he was. I hadn’t long bought my first house in a town in the north of England so it was easy commuting between his and my house. One conversation came up about me getting married and settling down. Unsure of what l should say l asked him how broad minded he was. He assured me that he was and l could tell him anything. At this point I think he thought I was about to announce that I was gay. I swallowed hard and told him that while l loved women l also liked men and was not exclusive. Dad went very quiet and I thought I had said too much. Maybe he could accept me being one or the other but not both. When I asked him what he was thinking he quickly reassured me that he was okay with it but I had my doubts. He then started asking questions about how long l had been like this and I told him honestly that I had been questioning myself for most of my adult life . Being brought up a Catholic I was not to have any of those sorts of feelings so l suppressed them. I had long thought there might be a genetic aspect to it and dad was going to tell me about a member of the family that had caused a scandal. But again there was more silence which worried me a great deal and had me thinking l had ruined my relationship with him.After a few minutes of silence l began to see if I could find a way out of this awkward moment when dad looked at me and announced that he too had had these feelings but that during his day it was illegal and impossible to meet like minded people except byencounter. So there it was. My bisexuality came from my dad. He suppressed his feelings and went down the conventional route, marrying my mother and having four children. I, with the help of the new internet technology was able to continue to experience both sides of my life. I have to say that this moment brought us closer together. We spent the rest of the afternoon talking about the bisexual side of our lives. He asked me about when l first discovered l liked sex with men and l briefly told him about the man in the cinema and Father Damien. l kept a lot of the details to myself, not wanting to shock the old man but he questioned me more closely about it and bit by bit he managed to drag almost everything out of me. My first wanking off by another man, my first blow job both
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