Interview with a Faggot

With apologies to Joecable and his ‘Interview with a Cocksucker’

Thanks for agreeing to be interviewed.

Happy to help.

How does a faggot differ from an ordinary gay guy? After all, most gays take dick.

Sure they do. But for most homos, taking cock is just part of making love with another guy and they like to get sucked or pump ass as much as they like the flipside. For fags, it's a bit different.

How is that?

Well, I think it's like this. Most cocksuckers like getting a blow job, what man doesn't, after all? But for someone like me, sucking a man's cock till he cums--servicing him, in other words--without reciprocation is the ultimate in sexual satisfaction. A faggot doesn't need to cum when he services, for in a very real sense the pleasure of the man he takes care of is his pleasure too. The more the top guy enjoys the encounter, the more his faggot enjoys giving it, the more fulfilled he feels in his role as fag, the more sexually satisfied he is. And sex is often not just about pleasure. It's also about satisfaction.

So a faggot likes to be used sexually?

Exactly. And, curiously, the less sexual interest the guy using us has in us, the better. A man using a faggot is using him to get his rocks off and to have his manhood worshiped, plain and simple. That's what the faggot is there for, on his knees for, to be used. So if the guy is straight or thinks homos are the lowest of the sexual low, that's fine. That just makes it even more of a privilege to get him off and makes his dick that much more exciting to worship.

You see, let's be honest, a true faggot needs another man's dick more than he needs his own. That's just a fact. So the more sexually potent the other man seems, the more masculine, the better, the more wonderful it is to suck his dick for him.

How long have you been taking dick?

Since I was fourteen. But I'd been thinking about dick and about taking it ever since I started jerking off when I was around twelve. I guess I already knew I was a fag, but hadn't come to grips with it yet.

How'd you get started?

My best friend had found one of his older brother's porno tapes and we were watching it on the VCR in the den of his house one afternoon when no one else was home. We'd been jerk-off buddies for awhile, so we both just pulled out our dicks and started stroking.

This was a straight porn tape?

Oh, yeah, his brother's straight. So is he, for that matter. So anyway, we're stroking and he's watching the tape and I'm more or less watching him. He noticed that I was looking at his dick more than at the slut getting porked on the tape.

"You like my dick?" he asked.

I said, "yeah, you got a nice dick." He did too, it's about seven inches, cut, with a smooth upward curve. That's still my favorite kind of meat to play with.

What's your dick like?

Well, not to boast, but like a surprising number of fags, I've got pretty big meat myself, a little bigger than Luke’s, maybe half an inch longer, even a little fatter.

Luke’s your buddy?

Yeah. He started showing off his dick to me and he asked if I wanted to play with it. I immediately forgot about my own dick and reached over and started stroking his for him. It felt like magic in my hand. After a minute or so he just said, "go ahead if you want to, I won't tell anyone."

I don't know how, but somehow he knew I wanted to suck it. I knew I could trust him--we'd been buddies since kindergarten--so I just leaned over and took it in my mouth.

What was your first reaction to having a dick in your mouth?

That I was in heaven. It was by far the most exciting moment in my young life. It was like his dick was electric, except in a wholly good way. I'll never forget how it felt. I guess I wanted cock as long as I could remember but it had never really clicked in my head that I could actually have the source of my desires.

Did he cum in your mouth?

No, not that time. He told me he was about to cum and took it out of my mouth and stroked it a couple of times and then came in quarts. Boy, did he make a mess. I went to the bathroom and got a towel and wiped him up.

Did you get to cum?

Yeah, I jerked off and wiped myself up but he seemed grossed out by it. Then we put the tape back where he found it so his brother wouldn't know we'd seen it.

What did he say afterwards?

Nothing. His mother came home about twenty minutes later and asked me to stay for dinner, but I had to go home.

What happened when you got home?

I jerked off about four times that night thinking about what had happened. But I also remembered how repulsed he seemed when I was jerking my cock. I was scared he'd not want to be friends with me any more since he’d proved that I was a fag. That was about the worst word you could call someone in our crowd, although most of the guys probably didn't think about what it really meant.

Is that what happened?

No, not at all. We hooked up in school the next day and he acted like nothing had happened. Then when we were walking home that afternoon, he asked me if I had liked it the day before. I knew what "it" was, of course, and said yeah, I had, and he said he had too. Then he asked me if I wanted to suck him off again. I said yeah, I did, and that was that. I was his faggot all through high school and that was just fine with me. And with him.

He ever suck you?

God no. He asked how I felt about giving him blow jobs while he didn't give me any and I told him that it was OK, I really enjoyed sucking him. And that was the truth. I just felt so alive when I had Luke’s dick, when he was sharing his manhood with me so I could get him off. But it was clear from the first moment that this was a one-sided thing.

He didn't care that his best friend had turned out to be queer?

Nope, he didn't, thank God. I wasn't a sissy or anything, but a hundred percent regular guy-guy and popular with others at school. No one in a million years would have thought I was a fag by how I acted. I just liked taking his cock when he needed it, being the instrument of his sexual pleasure while I fed my hunger for sperm. Some might have said he was taking advantage of me but I always knew I was taking advantage of him. But, no, I'm still a regular kind of guy except for being totally queer for a dude’s baby batter. In fact, he got off on the idea of what a normal jock type I was and would bait me occasionally by asking how I’d feel if some random member of our school sports teams found out how much I needed cum.

Did he ever fuck you?

God, yes. He got that idea in about a week. I’d never done it before but it just seemed like a natural progression between us. I mean, I love sucking cock and swallowing a tangy load but what sort of self-respecting faggot doesn’t hunger to have a dude pump him hard and shoot his load deep inside?

We stayed best friends and he took me two-three times a week. He'd joke with me that he was the only guy in school who never had to jerk off, because he had his very own, personal, private fag.

He'd ask for it or he'd just give me that look that told me he was horny and I'd get on my knees and service him. Sometimes at school he'd whisper to me, "Guess what I want," and I could hardly wait for school to get out. After he came he'd let me nurse on his dick while I JO'd, and then we'd go play tennis or whatever, just like two normal, teenage, male friends. I could usually beat his ass in tennis, too. I'm a better athlete than he is.

Could you ask to have sex with him if you were horny?

Oh, sure, and sometimes he would let me. But it wasn’t all that unusual for him to just say ‘no’ because he wasn’t horny that day, or that moment. That was when I first learned that being a faggot meant for a very unequal relationship. I took care of him when he needed it but otherwise I needed to wait or just jerking myself off if I couldn’t stand it until he was ready. Like I said, we were buddies but in bed I was there for his purposes and mine were my own private joy.

How soon before he came in your ass the first time?

The third or fourth time.

You like it?

I liked making him feel good, so it was heaven. But I've never liked a cock that much. I know a lot of faggots live for a big cock, but for me, it's the sperm I crave. It's being on my knees, ass up for a man, giving him pleasure while he gives me cum that I love. That’s why I hate condoms. Sure, often that is the safe approach but I crave having a buddy like Luke where we can dispense with the condom and I can accept his baby gravy entirely, with no barrier between him and me. Cock’s are nice but receiving a man’s spooge is the only respectable goal for a faggot.

So, you don’t like a cock?

A man’s cock is just the delivery device for his cum, and pleasuring his cock is just part of the job, so to speak. But it's an important part. And any fag is going to be drawn like a magnet to any male part: chest, abs, a tight butt, a low hanging set of balls. But none is as important as shooting a load. There's a reason we call it "breeding." A guy using a fag has every right to expect his cum to be accepted, and with fucking gratitude. I just try to be able to taste his sperm when he pops. Or to have his cock all the way up my ass. Then, I’ll moan with delight, knowing his little swimmers are filling me with proof of his superiority, his ultimate manhood, his final mark of domination. Or when I’m sucking, it’s then I look up at him and thank him with my eyes. Guys usually love that. Most aren’t going to get that kind of unreserved appreciation, tribute really, from a girl.

Your buddy the only guy you sucked in high school?

Oh, no. There was one other straight friend I serviced, and there were two other guys in our class who turned out to be fags too and I fooled around with them a lot once we found out that we batted for the same team. But that wasn't giving service--that was gay sex. None of us were out, of course.

A lot of guys fooled around together when they were horny, mostly mutual jack off, and the occasional sixty-nine. But being openly queer was way uncool and it was never, and I mean never, talked about. So it was great having a couple of friends I could be completely myself with, guys who knew I was a homo and who were homos themselves so they understood why I needed dick so much.

How'd you connect with the other straight guy?

We got kind of drunk one night at a party and I was staying at his house for the weekend. After we got home, we piled into bed together--he had a queen size bed in his room, so I always slept in it with him to save messing up a guest room--and pretty soon he was asleep and his dick was hanging out of his boxers so I started feeling him up. I figured I could always do the old boy-was-I-drunk-last-night-I-don't-remember-a-thing routine if necessary.

He got hard as I felt him up so I started sucking it. I guess he woke up because I felt him put his hand on the back of my head to indicate it was alright and he was enjoying it. He was a talker: suck me off, called me a queer, moaned about how much he loved getting sucked. So I continued sucking till he popped and then he just rolled over and went back to sleep and I jerked off, fagging out, feeling up his hot body.

He call you a queer the next day?

No, it turned out I wasn't the first guy he'd given access to his cock. He told me his older cousin had seduced him when he was thirteen and was still giving him head now and then. He was surprised to find out I liked sucking dick, but it was cool with him because his cousin had taught him to enjoy a good BJ. So it became a sort of regular thing. Not as often as with Luke, but at least a couple of times a month. I was happy, he was a jock and pretty beefy for a high school kid. And I know I just said I wasn’t all that into cocks themselves but his was a work of art: fat -- tumescent -- with a big head and maybe a full eight inches. But, he had a pretty hot and heavy girl friend at that time, so he was getting plenty in the pussy department, but she wouldn't suck his dick.

Did Luke know you were servicing him too?

Not at first, but he found out a couple of months later.

Did you tell him?

No. I always made a point of keeping the various parts of my sex life completely separate. I never told Luke about my fooling around with the other queer guys, or even that those guys were queer. And I didn't tell him about sucking off Kyle.

How'd he find out?

[Laughs] That's a bit of a story. It was after school was out in our junior year and I had gone over to Luke’s house one morning to play tennis with him. His family had a court.

I guess his family was pretty well off.

Yeah, his father's a big-deal lawyer in the city. But we were all spoiled-rotten-rich-kids, I guess. My dad's a doctor, a cardiologist. Everyone in the neighborhood's pretty well off. Anyway, I walked into the house without knocking, like we always did. I walked into Luke’s bedroom, and found Luke still asleep, the lazy prick. I woke him up and he started stretching his arms and legs. God, he was so gorgeous when he did that. He looked at me and said, "How about a nice wake-up blow job, cocksucker?"

He called you "cocksucker?"

When we were alone he would sometimes. More often, he called me faggot But it was always meant--and taken--as a term of endearment. I was his faggot as well as his best friend, and he was my feeder as well as my best friend, and that fact meant a lot to both of us.

So you just blew him right there?

He stripped off his boxers and swung his legs off the side of the bed and I got down on my knees between them and started servicing him. We were really getting into it when the door to his bedroom suddenly opened. We both just about shat peach pits. Our little secret thing was going to be all over school! we were going to be revealed as queers! our lives were ruined!

But thank God it was Kyle. He didn't know I sucked off Luke, but he already knew I was a cocksucker and I knew he wouldn't tell anyone because he was sharing his dick with me too. Luke was frantically reaching for his boxers, but I told him to calm down, it was alright.

Kyle helped by saying "Don't stop, guys," and taking his own dick out of his tennis shorts and starting to stroke it. So I just went back down on Luke, who'd lost his hard-on to put it mildly--so had I, of course, but I still had my shorts on. Pretty soon he was back in business and I took his load for him. After Luke popped, Kyle said, "OK, it's my turn," and Luke got off the bed and he took his place and I sucked him while Luke went and took a shower and brushed his teeth and stuff.

Did you suck them off together after that?

Not as a usual thing, but several times.

Who had the nicer dick?

They were both real nice. Luke’s even a little longer, but Kylehas a nice fat one and low hangers that I loved to lick. But then Luke could shoot way more cum, which is after all what I was hungry for.

How did things change after you went to college?

In some ways not at all, in other ways a lot. Luke went to a different college so I didn't get to see him nearly as much as when we were in school together. But he still wanted to be serviced when we were home on vacation. The first day I was back for Christmas vacation our freshman year, he called and said to come on over. No one was there besides Luke and pretty soon he gave me that horny look of his and asked me, "are you still my faggot?"

I just said, "always, you know that."

"Then come and get it," he said, I stood up and walked over to where I was laying on his bed. I undid my belt, shook off my jeans, flipped my boxers off, and climbed onto his cock, after I took a nice red ribbon tied in a bow off him. "Merry Christmas, faggot," he said, laughing as I plunged down on his cock with a single take. He fucked me three or four times that morning. Luke is just the coolest straight guy I know.

How soon before you got some dick in college?

[Laughs] About a week. I guess it was instinct, but I found the john in the library that had a glory hole. I had never sucked dick through a glory hole, or ever sucked stranger dick for that matter. But I knew instantly what it was for and I just sat there for a while. Pretty soon someone came in and took the next stall and sat down on the john. I could see through the hole that he was playing with his meat and he could see me looking at him. So he just stood up and stuck it through and I serviced him. When he popped, he just said, "thanks, faggot," zipped up and left.

Didn’t you get upset by him calling you a faggot? It’s not like he was your friend, like Luke.

[Laughs] Hell, no. I am a faggot. And a damn good one at that. By the grace of God.

But isn’t that word demeaning?

For some gays. But a fag relishes words like that.

Why?

Because in a world filled with lies, deception, it tells the truth. I am a fucking faggot. Proud to be. A fag was created to lust after cocks and cum, to appreciate real men, in more carnal ways no woman ever could. Unlike most gays, a faggot lusts after straight men -- breeders -- precisely because they are straight, because they are the progenitors of the human race. Literally, “fuckers”. It’s their role in life to fuck holes, to penetrate, to hold bitches and fags down and to shoot their cum up into them. I know that sounds crude but where would the world be without them? A faggot submits to them because they are who they are and he is who he is. It’s the way of the world. Only then does a faggot fully accept his place. Only when he is on his knees taking cock, only when he is being fucked up his ass, is he whole.

You don’t feel shame?

Actually, yes, I feel quite a lot of shame. That is a core part of the thrill of it. Life as a faggot can be hard. I really do wish that I could be a straight stud like them - king of the hill - so to speak. Many times. But I am not. But if I let the shame of taking their cocks stop me, how would I ever get their cum? [Laugh] In fact, that is a basic reason a faggot prefers a straight dude - because there is shame in serving his needs, to being subservient. But any time I am feeling so much shame that I hesitate, I look at their balls and think of how much sperm I can get and that snaps me out of it. To exist for no reason other than to sexually pleasure another at their whim is shameful but it sure does have its benefits! After awhile, a faggot must learn to fetishize his shameful desire for a real man’s cum.

It sounds a bit unnatural, at least to some.

One thing I learned in my Introduction to Evolution class, is that homosexuality has to have some purpose, otherwise it would cease to exist. If it doesn’t further procreation, it isn’t tolerated.

And what’s the evolutionary purpose of homosexuality?

Well, there are many different theories about that, for sure. But a common one is that gays in general help provide release for straight men, a way of getting their rocks off without having to fight over women all the time. After all, how much conflict in human history has come from that? Another is that gay men provide extra brawn to work, to fight, to help the community, asking almost nothing in return - other than the chance to get fucked by a meaty cock [laughs]. If that means taking your cousin’s load so he doesn’t have to go without where’s the problem with that? Win-win.

So you’re saying, gays are an evolutionary response to this? But then why aren’t all homosexuals like you?

Like me?

You know, a cocksucker, a faggot?

Who knows for certain? Maybe most gays are defective versions of guys like me. Maybe they are supposed to be faggots too. Maybe they just need to learn to submit. In my opinion, if they try it, they’ll never be satisfied with a homo cock again.

Hmmmm. So you started going to the library regularly?

Sure did. [Laughs] And that's where I met the other faggots on campus. You'd be surprised how many guys like to take cock. Pretty soon I was friends with them. We formed a sort of secret underground sex club, taking care of each other and telling each other about hot cruisy spots. That's how I learned about Rick's.

What's Rick's?

Rick's was a gay bar downtown that had a backroom. I guess the owner was the police chief's brother-in-law or something because it was always full of college-age kids using fake ID's but there was never any trouble, even with all the sex going on, let alone the drinking.

What was the backroom like?

It was half open to the front, so you could see if there was any action going on. Dark, but not too dark to see. Along one side there was a built-in bench where the cocksuckers would sit and service the guys who came in needing blow jobs. On occasion, a guy wanted more and would pass a note through the hole asking if we could go to one of the side rooms with a cot. Some nights it could get wild with maybe twenty guys in there fucking and sucking at the same time.

You liked it?

I loved it. It was a faggy dream. I had no idea such a place existed. I mean I know whorehouses existed, that guys could pay for sex with women, but where guys would take cock -- for free? [Laughs] But Eddie, another cocksucker at college, took me there one night and we sat on the bench together and we each just did one guy after another and even shared a couple of nice cocks. I was hooked.

How'd you meet Eddie?

In the library john at school. We encountered each other there one night when we cruised each other. But it was soon obvious that we were both fags and we became friends. He was more experienced than I--he was a class ahead of me--and he showed me the hot spots and introduced me to some of the other faggots on campus. He introduced me to David.

Who was David?

He taught both Eddie and me how to be legitimate fags. Not just the physical act of bringing another guy to climax with your mouth or ass. Eddie and I were both pretty good at that by that point. But the psychological aspects of coveting not another man’s sperm but the load of a man otherwise straight looking and straight acting, to pine for such a stud’s load every moment outside of the ten seconds after receiving it. And all that comes with that. How to truly give service and submit to a man when he shares his dick with you, so the experience is at its best for both of you. As David told us, although taking cock is about a male giving sexual pleasure to another male, like all sex it's really about both guys getting mutual satisfaction.

Except there is something unique about one seeking cum as a purpose and the other just being horny and seeking to dominate another toward that end. David pointed out that the world could only be in harmony when both males were freely following their own nature, each to its appropriate conclusion: one being the aggressor, the penetrator, and the other submitting, being penetrated. One filling the other with his seed, the other wasting his into the air or on the floor, one’s load hitting the target and being taken in, the other blocked and destined to be wiped up and thrown away. You might say, one load treasured by both men as the highlight of both of their days while the other’s is shamefully removed as waste, almost impotent. Get it? One begged for and one discarded. In fact, some men are even repulsed by a fag’s cum although most take some pleasure in the consummate proof that the faggot is getting off by being dominated by a real man.

Most gays who aren’t faggots get a glimpse of this, maybe preferring one role over the other, but in some ways it’s more like play acting, not being prisoner to one’s created purpose, not seeking one’s actual sexual destiny in life to the exclusion of all other distractions. In fact, David claimed that all males were exclusively tops or bottoms. Those who claimed otherwise were just confused sexual tourists.

Why aren’t most straight men willing to make use of another man?

Hard to say. Maybe they’re not fully men. [Laughs] No real man would turn down taking advantage of an opportunity to unload, at least if he was horny. My guess is that society’s attitude of dismissal, its misunderstanding, is what leads most men to not consider it, or at least not act on it. They probably are just thinking of gays in general, that they’ll want a relationship or something. Faggots aren’t after that, at least a romantic attachment. [Laugh] There’s little romance in spreading your hole so a man can fuck it uncontrollably, or to line up his cock with your mouth to skull fuck you. Romance is the last thing on his mind but then again it isn’t for us fags either. To be sure, it can be great to find a guy like Luke, who you can be friends with -- when he’s not fucking you -- if only to increase the odds that he’ll fuck you again. Believe me, the first thought on a faggot’s mind after he takes a stud’s load is where and when he can find the next one.

But, trust me, after I’ve shown a stud the possibilities, I’ve never met one that didn’t go back for more, at least from time to time. After all, they’re focused on the jackpot - a woman to fuck - and for all but the real studs, that’s quite a lift. Life is more than the pursuit of a piece of fickle tail, a madonna. At least that's what David tended to think.

Was he another student?

No. He was older, about thirty. Really hot. He was a lawyer and a born top, just like Eddie and I are born fags.

Tell me some of the things he taught you.

I guess the most important was that if you're a faggot you have to learn to accept yourself as a faggot, accept your sexual destiny so to speak: That your sexual pleasure comes from the pleasure you can give other men, that it's their dick that's important not your own. I'll never forget the first thing he told Eddie and me when we went to his apartment that first time.

What was that?

That "most guys need only their own dick to get sexual pleasure. But a faggot needs someone else's dick and that has consequences."

Explain that a little.

What he meant was that the guy who owns the dick you're both enjoying is the guy who calls the shots, that he's the sexually superior of the two and what he says goes. You're on your knees to take care of him, not yourself.

Is that what you meant by being a faggot?

Hell, yes. A faggot by nature submits. He gets on his knees, or he bends over, or he spreads his legs wide to allow access to a man. You think most men want to waste time with some gay guy pretending he has any other purpose? [snort] In my experience, most men really appreciate a good fag.

Did that bother you at first?

Yeah, it did at first. I'm a faggot, but I'm still a man. I didn't like to think of myself as inferior to other men just because I want to suck their dicks. But he explained that it's only during sex that a faggot must accept, indeed he must learn to relish, his sexual inferiority to the man using him so they both can get the most out of it sexually. The rest of the time you can just be friends and equals, like Luke and I were equals as friends, even though I was his cocksucker. A faggot isn’t an inferior person. He is just created to be inferior sexually to a man, a heterosexual man. That’s the way both have been designed. It’s like questioning black and white, up and down. Any guy is designed so he could get physical pleasure from being fucked and homosexuals are designed to have the instinct to want that. A faggot is a special type of homo that bridges the gap and makes this design make sense.

I soon figured out that he was right. After all, I'm on my knees and the other guy is standing up, using me sexually because I'm a cocksucker and I want to be used. Of course I'm his sexual inferior in those circumstances. When I find a man who is receptive, I would say I hunger after him. Lust, to be sure, but it is stronger than that, almost painful. I would do almost anything to be able to touch him, to touch his cock, lick his balls, all in the service of getting his cum for myself, to giving him pleasure.

So you're content to be a faggot?

Totally. Enthusiastic, actually. I'm proud to be a faggot through and through. I relish elevating a virile man and his manhood, even if it is at my expense, whether he’s demanding, calls me a faggot, whatever, although the best is when they’re like Luke - confident, knows their role at the top of the sexual pecking order, appreciative of me, not so timid as to be too polite and avoid calling me as a cocksucker - even while I am sucking his cock![rolls eyes] - to tell the truth by naming me properly - faggot For a brief time, their faggot, born to give them pleasure and to let them fulfill their own evolutionary role. I'm proud I can give so much sexual pleasure to other guys while they give me the sexiest thing in the world in exchange.

What's that?

[He smiles] A dick swollen with cum.