First Time I was Called “Faggot”

This was around 2010 and I was living in Amsterdam on a 3-year assignment. I had met this British guy online, Kevin, who owned a shop in the city. He was in his upper 40’s, I was upper 30’s. He was tall, like 6’5”, and stocky, around 210#, thick legs, thick pecs, hairy, buzzed dark hair, dark eyes. We chatted online for awhile and he liked I was passive and he was active, or dominant. We chatted about our likes and dislikes, and ultimately, he invited me to his shop and wanted to fuck me in the back room after hours.

I showed up very nervous. In person he looked intimidating and overpowering. He was a big man with a deep voice. I was slender and meek. When the shop closed he locked the door, and we walked to the back room where he had a mattress on the floor. He also had a paddle and a strap, and cuffs. He saw me looking around and he commanded, “pull down your pants, I want to see that ass”. I timidly pulled down my jeans and they fell to the floor. He walked over and felt my ass, smacked it, and then said, “bend over”. He reached over for the strap and gave it a few hard whacks. The sound of the leather cracking against my flesh resonated the store room. When my ass had a nice burn going, he stopped, and he pushed his finger in my mouth, then added 2 more, and he shoved them into my tight ass.  I was still bent over, hands on my knees.

Then Kevin shoved me down on the mattress, and I was in my hands and knees. He pulled off his pants and said, “I’m gonna fuck that ass, faggot”. And, for the first time, that word struck a chord in me. I liked it. It fit. And as I was thinking these thoughts, Kevin spit on his hand and lubed his cock, and pushed it inside. He was maybe 6”, but very thick. What he lacked in length, he more than made up for in width. His balls were big and hairy. He began to fuck me rapidly, smacking my ass, “take that cock faggot”, he screamed. I was wailing like a tramp, begging him to fuck me harder, and within 20 minutes or so, he creamed my insides. He smacked my ass and ordered me to “clean up this mess”. And I sucked his cock until it was sparkling.

So here it is all these years later, and I think about what it means to be a faggot. To me, a true faggot seeks out bareback tops. A true faggot’s purpose is to service and bring pleasure to men. There is nothing more pleasurable than a man seeding an ass. That is the ultimate for a bareback alpha top. Another quality of a true faggot is to prioritize service; it’s not a choice, a faggot has no “free time”, if called to service, you go unquestionably. Serving cock is not a side show, it’s the main event. It’s what we live for.

I’m a faggot that sets goals. I chose quantity over quality. I take any and all loads. Goals are usually about how many loads I strive for in a day, or a week, or a month. A faggot always wants more cock, and more cum. This why a true faggot never says “no”. A faggot finds a way to be available, to be of service. Faggots are cock and cum addicts. It’s never enough, and when not sucking on a cock or taking a cock up the ass, we feel empty.

So back to Kevin, when he first called me “faggot”, he knew these things about me before I knew them myself. He helped me explore my faggotry over the 3 years. There were many times he brought his buddies to the store room. They would cuff me or tie me to the stairs taking turns with my mouth and ass, using the paddle, strap, or even whip me. They did whatever they needed to do, and I let them because they wanted to. You suffer through to get the cock and the cum, that is a sign of a true faggot.

Kevin brought me a few times to the gay bars with play spaces. He would have me strip down to my jockstrap and hold my clothes, and either find me tops to load me up or order me to get them. He wouldn’t let me have my clothes back until I had a certain number of loads taken. We went initially for only 3, but worked up to 15 sometimes. He loved to watch me get loaded up and then he’d fuck me and add his load. It would always be the last load of the night.

There were a few times when the weather was nice he’d take me to an outdoor cruising place. At night it would get busy. I recall a few times being the center of gamgbangs. He would take my clothes and stand just far enough to see what was happening but not participate until the action was over, then he’d bend me over a tree trunk and finish me off.

There was also a time he brought me to the sauna in Amsterdam. He had me hop into the sling and blindfold me. I took many loads in the sling, then he brought me to the dark room, more loads. Then we went into a room with a door, and he’d be the final fuck.

Coincidentally, Kevin moved back to the Uk around the same time i returned to the US. We had some awesome times together. I am forever grateful to Kevin for challenging me, and teaching me what it really means to be a faggot. With his guidance over the 3 years, I was well on my way to the faggot I have become now, and when I service cock, I feel fulfilled, but one cock, one load, is never enough!