PRESENT DAY
“Tyler just phoned me, don’t worry, they have landed safely and are already on their way here. Oh Justin, thank God you’re here, please do your old mother a favour and boil the water for the coffee that it’s ready for when they get here? There just isn’t enough time for everything to be done this time of the year! It’s Christmas in two days!”
Justin Simmons smiled his classic, signature sexy grin that he knew he possessed and hugged his mother from behind in a pathetic attempt to calm her down.
Fuck knows, she ALWAYS gets like this around Christmas and New Year’s and no matter how much himself, his husband and their two kids, or even his brother Tyler and his family wanted to help, their mother had always insisted on doing all the preparations and the cooking herself.
“Hands off, this is my kitchen!” was heard at least three times a day in their household, but Justin knew it was her way of making sure she was still able to give her family a traditional Christmas lunch.
“Oh, give over!” Belinda Simmons laughed as she playfully pushed her youngest son away from her as she stormed off to somewhere in the house, and within seconds finding something else to do.
That was their mother alright, and quite frankly, neither himself or Tyler would have wanted it any other way.
“Dad, can you please talk to Gina, she refuses to share her sweets with me!” his thirteen-year-old son Matthew, or Matt for short, moaned as soon as he stepped into the room that the twins was sharing for the time they were back at home for the holidays.
The same room that Tyler and he used to share when they were kids.
“Gina, what did I say about sharing?” Justin sternly said towards his daughter, who rolled her eyes in complete and utter disgust.
“That is so unfair! Matt ate his yesterday, so why should I share mine with him? He SO wouldn’t have done it, if was the other way around!” she nastily lambasted her twin brother, who proceeded to pull several devilish faces towards his sister the moment that he thought Justin couldn’t see.
Justin sighed and rubbed the back of his neck.
He loved both of his children dearly, and holy shit knows, himself and his husband Jack went through mountains of paperwork and interviews to have finally adopted them years before, but sometimes…especially this time of the year to be precise, there was other things that was wracking his brain.
Things…that he couldn’t possibly talk about with Jack.
To be fair…things that he couldn’t possibly discuss with anyone.
Things that his family wouldn’t understand, even if they saw it with their own damn eyes.
“Gina, tell you what, why not share yours with your brother for now, and I’ll make sure to buy you some more when we get to the shops later okay? I’m sure Uncle Tyler, Aunt Yvonne and your nieces would love to go and see a movie or something tonight, so we’ll do it then. Okay?” he pleaded with his two children, before Matt smirked at his sister.
“See? They have always loved me more!”
“DAD!”
Justin begged for patience.
“Matt, I’m only going to say this once…stop that immediately, or I’m changing the WIFI password. Do we understand each other?”
Jesus.
Kids these days…threaten to take away their connections to the outside world and they are eating out the palm of your hand.
“Okay…sorry Dad. Just…anything but that, please!” Matt begged, his bright blue eyes perfectly complimenting his lavish, unblemished boyish face and his blond hair that was falling all over his forehead.
If not for his blond hair, to Tyler’s jet-black the two of them would have been twins.
Gina crossed her arms and stuck her tongue out at her brother.
“Oh yes, of course, we cannot have that! Otherwise, you cannot talk to ANDREA, now, can you?”
If looks could kill, we would have totally been digging Gina’s grave right now.
“Andrea?” Justin turned to his son, lifting his eyebrows in mocking level of shock.
Of course, he knew who Gina was talking about but he couldn’t resist in teasing his boy just a tad.
Matt’s face currently resembled what could only be described as an overripe tomato.
“I can’t believe you! This is WAR! You won’t be so smug when I put your passport photo on Tiktok!” he shouted back, followed by an incredibly hysterical Gina going after her brother, faster than Justin have ever seen her run before.
He knew Matt wouldn’t really go that far. The twins have always been tight, ever since their biological parents died in a car crash several years before Justin and Jack had adopted them, so he knew they loved each other…they just didn’t like to actually show it.
“Trouble in paradise?” he heard Jack whispered as he smiled, knowing what was coming.
Jack hugged his husband from behind and softly kissed his neck.
“Not here, not with my mother in the house, babe…” Justin whispered back, but also did nothing to stop his husband from showing affection as he always tended to do.
“Have I told you lately how much I love you?” Jack whimpered against his ear, sending several shivers across the levels of his skin.
“Uhm…lemme think…this morning in bed when you fucked me?” Justin smiled and leaned back into his husband.
“What time is your brother Tyler and his family going to be here?”
“Mom said they phoned earlier, and they will be here soon.”
Jack turned him around so that he was facing him, and planted a kiss on Justin’s lips, softly and tenderly as he always did.
“Enough time for us to be alone for a couple of minutes before the house REALLY gets crowded…” he said, kissing Justin deeply and lovingly.
Once he released the lips of his husband, he pressed their foreheads together in a total sign of unison.
“Babe…you know I don’t like it when you do that…makes it feel…weird as hell,” Justin sighed as he pulled away from Jack.
“Yeah, why is that? I love you, Justin…all I wanna do is show it,” Jack said, his voice quivering at the sound of Justin’s voice.
Justin took the sides of his husband’s face inside both of his hands.
He looked at him…REALLY looked at him.
His heart just wasn’t in it.
It never really had been, and he crusified himself for it every…single…God…damn…day.
And not for the first time since they had been married, Justin yearned for more.
Much, much more.
Unfortunately, what he needed, and what he craved especially this time of the year, was something that his husband would never, ever be able to give him.
Through no fault of his own.
He just…
…he just wasn’t Tyler.
**
FIFTEEN YEARS AGO
“Look kids, I know this has come as a massive shock…”
Eighteen-year-old Justin stood up and at that point and time REALLY wanted to pick something up and throw it against the expensive kitchen tiles, but having heard that they had to sell their house and move to a smaller suburb, and therefore also a smaller house, he had to do his best not to FREAK OUT more than he had already done.
“What the hell, Dad? What gives? I thought we were rich!” he screamed at his father, who was sitting at the kitchen table complete with his head in both of his hands.
“Dude! Fucking hell, give Dad a break! Didn’t you hear when he said that he was being let go from his job? That’s not his fault; he fucking did his best! Blame the idiot company that he’s been slaving all these years for! Everything ain’t always about you! Jesus!”
Justin snapped around and stared at his older brother in a mixture of hatred and disgust. His fists were balled next to his body and he shook his head, looking over towards their mother as he did so.
“Mom? Really? You’re just gonna stand there and allow this? This is the house me and Tyler grew up in! And now we have to sell it because Dad fucked up? How unfair is that? No, scratch that, it’s total BULL SHIT, that’s what it is!”
Their mother held up the palm of her right hand, and she stared at her youngest son in the way that only an angry mother could ever do.
“Justin, hear me out when I say, that I support your father in everything he does, and I have NO DOUBT that he will land back on his feet again and sooner than you and Tyler probably think…”
“Hey, why drag me into this? I told you I’m on Dad’s side?” came the scathing reply from Tyler.
Justin showed his brother the finger before he through his hands in the air as dramatically as he could.
“We have to leave all our friends here…and move to some God-awful little apartment building on the other side of town? And all because DAD says so?”
“JUSTIN!” thundered their father as he finally remembered he had a pulse, and stood up and placed both of his big hands on the shoulders of his youngest son, looking him straight in the eye.
“I didn’t plan this, you ungrateful little shit! I have always made it my life’s mission to take care of not only your ass, but your mother and your brother too! Forgive me that I never ONCE expected that I would lose my job after being the TOP SALESMAN for two decades straight! Do we understand each other!? DO YOU HEAR ME, JUSTIN?”
Justin shuddered as he felt the force of his father’s desperation, in his heart of hearts knowing that he had probably gone too far. He swallowed his pent-up saliva that had been accumulating inside his throat, before he sighed and stepped away from his dad.
“If we are going to be living in a smaller house…”
“Apartment, jackass. Keep up!” came the incessant taunt from Tyler.
Justin closed his eyes and prayed for peace.
“If we do this, Tyler is going to have to give me privacy. I’m used to my space and…”
“Oh brother, we all know you jack off; it’s really not a secret anymore…”
“OH MY GOD, TYLER! I’m gonna fucking kill you!”
That was the moment Belinda Simmons decided seemingly that enough was enough. She pulled both of her sons apart when Justin looked like he wanted to rip Tyler’s head from his body, before she stood firmly between them, trying to calm the situation the fuck down.
“That is it. I have had it! Justin…your father is absolutely right. You are indeed an ungrateful little shit! You have NEVER wanted for anything in this house and at the first sign of trouble, suddenly your father is the worst person on the face of this planet!”
“Tell him Mom!”
“And YOU are just as bad! Tyler, you’re supposed to be the older sibling, but instead you are actively taunting Justin at every turn, making everything that much worse than it already is! NO! this stops now!”
Belinda Simmons took a huge breath, before she nonchalantly continued.
“And by the way, Justin, you can forget about having any sort of privacy because the apartment we are moving to, only has two bedrooms, so that means you and Tyler are going to have to share.”
“WHAT?” came the outrage from both brothers and exactly the same time.
Justin’s brown, caramel coloured spiky hair was whipping all over the show with his anger, and for the first time that evening, even Tyler had lost his cool, with his jet-black hair flopping all over his forehead as he too, stared at their mother in sheer disbelief.
“Uhm…what the actual hell? I’m fucking nineteen years old! Mom, I have a girlfriend! I can’t…I can’t be sharing a room with this loser!” Tyler spat out as he pointed his finger shakingly at his younger brother.
“Who the fuck are you calling a loser? And as for Lauren, she obviously hasn’t seen your manky ass cock yet because she would run a mile…”
“Better than fucking a DUDE, you fucking homo!”
“FUCK YOU!”
“BACK AT YOU!”
“BOYS! ENOUGH!” their father proceeded to finally bring an end to things.
“I promise you, the moment that I’m back on my feet again, the very moment that we have enough funds to get us out of this predicament, I will look at a better home for us, even better than this one…but for now, I’m afraid that we have to make sacrifices. You are teenagers for heaven’s sake! You want to tell me that you aren’t grown up enough to each share a room with your own blood brother?”
Justin crossed his arms and gave Tyler yet another one of his death stares, where as Tyler himself sighed and shook his head.
“Can’t I just sleep on the couch at least if it’s only for a couple of months…?”
“No, Tyler. Now you two boys be grown up about this, and learn the reality of how the world really works. I have every faith in your dad that he will get us back on track in the end. I’m going to bed. Remember to switch the TV and the air con off before you two go to bed. And that is the end of this!” Belinda warned as it seemed that Justin wanted to protest against the move to a smaller apartment once more.
Their dad patted their shoulders one by one, before suddenly the two brothers were all alone in the huge ass kitchen that they had grown up in from before they could remember.
“I fucking hate you, you know that?” Justin whispered.
Tyler smirked.
“Whatever, loser…” he taunted back before he sighed and walked slowly up to his room.
**
TWO MONTHS LATER
“Oh my God…he’s really sending me his…”
Justin breathed out loud as the picture finally popped up on his phone’s screen.
Jesus.
He licked his lips as he stared at the photo of the Eighteen-year-old cock that he had just been sent by the hottest boy in school. Kyle Richards was so fucking hot, and sometimes Justin still couldn’t believe that he was actually into him.
Into him…Justin of all boys.
He licked his lips as he recognized the veins and curves of Kyle’s dick, having become quite fond of the phallus over the past few weeks. It tasted even better than it looked, and he knew that all too well.
Of course, Kyle had to hide himself being into guys as well, and therefore he had a steady girlfriend, but of course he had given Justin more than reassurances that it was only just for show. The captain of the school’s first rugby team couldn’t afford not to have a girlfriend and all that malarky.
God, he wished he could jack off, but these days you never knew who might walk in on you.
That, Justin learned the hard way about a week after they had moved into the very, very small apartment thanks to his father losing his job. He was sure…fuck man, he was SO SURE that there was no one home that afternoon when he decided to jack off yet to another picture of the popular Kyle…
…and in walked his mother.
Of all fucking people.
Justin sighed.
His entire world has been knocked sideways. The sharing of the room didn’t work, it was never going to work, not with Tyler.
Where as Justin himself was tidy and neat and liked to keep his things orderly in a certain place, Tyler was the exact opposite. He tended to leave every nook and cranny that he wore on the floor, or on his bed and after a whole day of wearing said clothes, you can think how it smelled.
Numerous times Tyler and himself had been at each others throats because of petty things like Tyler randomly farting just as Justin felt himself drifting away to sleep, the fact that they always had to watch what Tyler wanted to on the TV in their room, because Tyler was adamant that the older brother should always get preference.
Fuck that.
On one of the nights when Tyler was out with his girlfriend Lauren, Justin super glued all of Tyler’s underwear together in one big pile, claiming innocence when Tyler eventually found out. The outcome meant two bloody noses and both of the boys being grounded for two weeks.
“And what do we have here?”
FUCK!
Justin sprung upwards and tried his best to get his phone away from his brother, but Tyler unfortunately was older and much stronger, and more muscled than he was, and snatched the phone away from his younger sibling quicker than that Justin could react, laughing pushing Justin backwards as he tried to get his phone back, the younger boy landed smack bang on his back, onto the floor.
“Jesus, Tyler! Grow the fuck up!” Justin yelled as he got up in record time and once more tried to get his phone back, but Tyler was relentless.
“Nah uh! Not until I see who you are talking to…ah I see. Fuck man, when I said you were gay, I was JOKING! What the actual hell is this?” he demanded, all laughter now disappearing from his boyish face faster than you could say busted.
Justin was really panicking now.
There were times that Tyler had called him homophobic names before, but there was never really proof that he was gay. And in all those times, even with all the animosity between the brothers, he never really thought that Tyler meant what he said…it was more shooting the shit than anything else.
But that picture of Kyle’s dick on his phone.
You couldn’t possibly get more evidence that Justin was gay, than that.
“Tyler…come on man, just give it back…” he started to say, before Tyler surprised him by throwing his phone back to him, catching it before it dropped onto the floor, just in time.
“Bro…what the hell? Kyle, of all people? You do realise that he’s hella straight with a girlfriend, right?” Tyler grimaced, and sat down on his filthy bed to try and find something clean to wear.
Justin frowned and placed his phone back onto his desk at the side of his own bed.
“What? No snarky comments about me having a picture of a guy’s dick and balls on my phone? No calling me a homo? Are you gonna tell Mom and Dad now? Should I fucking pack my bags?” he ranted on and on, as he normally did when he was nervous as hell.
Tyler smiled and his eyes lit up the moment that he found a t-shirt that vaguely didn’t smell like body odour, before he took off his school shirt and replaced it with the aforementioned t-shirt. Picking up his Axe body spray he proceeded to douse himself with the stuff, before he winked at his brother.
“That’s more like it! Now why should I tell Mom and Dad that their youngest boy is gay? I’ve known it for years! I bet they know it too! Dude, you’re Eighteen and you’ve never had a girlfriend, that’s normally a dead giveaway. There’s nothing wrong with it, chill the fuck out, brother! So, you like guys instead of girls. So, you like dick instead of pussy. Fuck me how the hell that happens, but we all know it does and it’s okay. I ain’t judging.”
Justin nearly swallowed his chewing gum as Tyler finished his sentence.
“You really…you don’t care that I’m…a faggot, as you always call me?” he whispered.
“Hey, you’re still my brother, even though sometimes I can’t actually stand you, right? YOU are the one who always says how much you hate me. Have I ever told you that I hate you back?”
Justin wanted to open his mouth to respond, but now that he thought about it…yes, they were like cats and dogs, well some days more like oil and water some days but suddenly he couldn’t think of a single time that Tyler actually said in so many words, that he hated him.
Because he never did? Or because he just couldn’t remember?
“I’m not as bad as you maybe think I am, Justin…” came the tepid response from Tyler, before he reached for his cap and placed it on his head with the back facing front, smiling his signature handsome grin straight at Justin.
“Gotta go and tell the parents not to wait up, okay? Got a hot date with Jenny tonight. Taking her to the ice rink where it’s nice and cold, and hopefully she’ll allow me to warm her up, if you know what I mean. Later, loser!”
Justin turned away for a few seconds, before a shattering thought ripped the corners of his mind.
“Wait what? Who the hell is Jenny? Your girlfriend’s name is LAUREN, you man whore!”
Tyler turned around and looked down at Justin as if he was simply a stone in his way.
“Met her at Lauren’s birthday party last week and decided to shoot my shot. And by the way, Lauren doesn’t know any of this, so if she finds out, I’m gonna know exactly who told her. You don’t wanna be near me when that happens, okay?” Tyler said menacingly.
Justin’s anger got the better of him.
Lauren was in his grade, and she was such a gentle, beautiful soul. It wrecked him when she and Tyler started dating because there was a part of him, right from the very beginning that knew, if Tyler would ever fuck this up, Lauren wouldn’t want anything to do with him ever again either.
“You’re a real piece of shit! You’re actually cheating on Lauren!” he yelled out loud, but Tyler was simply unphased.
“I ain’t gonna feel guilty, brother. I’m nineteen, I can’t hitch my wagon to just one girl at this point and time. Like I said, later loser!”
Justin picked up the closest thing that he could reach, the can of Axe spray that Tyler had used before HURLING it towards his brother, missing him by mere centimetres. Tyler doubled over in laughter of his pathetic attempt to actually hurt him.
“Dude! I should teach you how to throw because GOD that was embarrassing…”
“FUCK YOU! I hate you so fucking much, you literally have NO idea! I wish you were DEAD!”
Tyler smirked before he picked up the bottle of Axe and tossed it over towards Justin.
“Hey, at least I don’t get off about having a cock in my mouth, do I?” he sneered before he threw Justin a thumbs up, and left the room.
Justin could hear his incessant laughter all the way to the family car, before Tyler drove off to his date.
He paced up and down in their shared room. He was seething…God, he was so angry.
At Tyler for always getting the better of him. At Tyler for clearly being his parents’ favourite child. At Tyler, who would clearly have to bring all their grandkids into this world, because Justin himself was gay and would probably never have the guts to sleep with a girl.
He had never hated Tyler as much as he did then.
He honestly hoped he crashed the car and burned in hell.
Tyler would more than fucking deserve that.
**
He was asleep when the home phone rang.
Sad and angry because of the limited WIFI they were forced to endure because they no longer had uncapped internet and therefore, he couldn’t afford to stream anything on Netflix in glorious 480p quality, because that was the cheapest package.
He hated what his life had become. He wished at that point and time that he could just fall asleep and never wake up.
He also heard his mother scream and sat up quickly.
He heard his father speaking over the phone, as his mother had probably stepped away.
Or perhaps it was still her volatile screams that he could hear across the apartment.
Of what happened next, Justin wasn’t quite sure over the years that would follow.
He barely seemed to remember that his father, as white as he has never seen him, had walked into his room…slowly as he had ever done, sat next to Justin on the side of his bed, and calmly explained to him that he had sad news.
That Tyler had been in a car accident.
A drunk driver had rammed into him, just when he was on his way home from his date with Jenny.
It took a few seconds for Justin to register what had happened, but once he finally did, his brain worked overtime.
The guilt was already eating him up, over what he had said to Tyler before he had driven off earlier that night. He told his brother that he had wished he was dead.
And now, hours later, Tyler was laying flat on his back inside a hospital bed, and the doctors said that it was touch and go where survival was concerned at that point.
As himself, and his parents finally were given permission to enter the hospital room where Tyler was being treated, he felt a sharp pain inside the corners of his heart, as he saw his brother…as vulnerable and as shattered as he had never seen him before.
All their lives, Tyler had always been the brave one of the two. The stronger one. The more muscled. The more popular. If there was ever a crisis, Tyler would be the one everyone would expect Justin to turn to. He was the older brother, after all.
Right now…that image was well and truly shattered.
He was currently being kept alive by some machine that made a ghoulish noise every few seconds, there were numerous lights and numbers and computer screens just about everywhere that you looked.
Justin swallowed slowly. His parents were still talking to the doctors about Tyler’s condition so it seemed that he had a few minutes alone with his older brother.
He was shaking. His chest was heaving and he struggled to talk.
He told Tyler that he wished he was dead.
Jesus Christ.
Slowly, as if he was in some kind of living fucking nightmare, he reached out with his left hand and softly took Tyler’s inside of his own, gently squeezing it as he did so.
His eyes fluttered over Tyler’s handsome features. His brother was good looking, that was no secret, even as his sibling, he wasn’t blind by any means. He just never realised how…how beautiful he really was, until this very moment.
This was his brother.
Times when they would fight to the death over stupid ass things like clothes on the floor or being forced to share a room FLOODED through Justin’s brain as the first tear trinkled across his cheeks.
When he told Tyler he hated him, he meant it. Oh God, he meant it.
But he didn’t want him to die.
That part was said in anger, that he knew.
But the point was…he had SAID it.
It was the final thing that Tyler had heard him say before…
…before all of this.
“I’m…I’m sorry…” he croaked out quietly before he was rejoined by his parents.
**
In the days that followed, Tyler continued to get stronger and stronger. It seems like the accident had not damaged his brain as much as they had previously feared and was scheduled to eventually make a complete recovery.
To this day, Justin had refused to visit Tyler at the hospital, and try as they have might, his parents couldn’t get him to change his mind.
Justin was scared. Scared to face his brother and to man up about his last words to him before he almost died.
He was too scared to look Tyler in the eye and apologise for what was said. If his parents ever knew what the real reason was that he refused to even as much say Tyler’s name, they would have kicked him out of the house yonks ago.
About five and a half weeks after that terrible night, Tyler was ready to be released from hospital.
Justin’s heart fluttered as he realised that there was no hiding anymore. His parents told him often that Tyler asked after him, but he always clammed up when he was questioned. It must have been so weird to both of them…the mere fact that Tyler almost died and Justin had flat up refused to even see him.
To his credit, he made sure their room was in perfect condition for Tyler’s return. He had even gone to the trouble to make sure there was Coke Zero in the fridge, knowing that Tyler didn’t drink anything with sugar. By the time that his parents wheeled Tyler into the house, he was a nervous wreck.
He stood aside in the living room, as their dad wheeled Tyler into the area, and he froze as he felt his brother’s eyes directly on his own.
It was like his eyes held those of Justin hostage, as if it never wanted to let them go.
The first chance that he had gotten to actually talk to Tyler alone, was later on that night, after all the kids from school that had come over to greet Tyler back from the hospital had gone home. By the time that he had brushed his teeth and finished his shower, and slowly entered the room that they both shared, his parents had already made sure that Tyler was safely tucked in bed, ready for the night.
His tablets and a glass of water as at his side table, ready for him to have when the pain became worse.
“Mom said you should help me with that…I mean if you want to. I can’t take them myself; my leg and my arm is still fucked. I’m sorry,” Tyler said after a few awkward moments of silence between the two brothers, before he sighed and tried to turn on his side, but his arm in the sling was given him more trouble than it was worth.
“Dude, the doctor said that you should sleep on your back…”
“Yes, thank you, Justin I fucking know what the damn doctor said, okay?”
Silence.
Total and utter silence.
Justin swallowed slowly and gently climbed into bed, as to not…what was the word…disturb Tyler by any means. He turned on his side and grabbed his phone, and saw that Kyle was online, before he started to type the boy a message.
“That Kyle you’re chatting to?”
Sigh.
“Yeah,” Justin answered.
More silence.
“Bro, he’s never gonna leave her for you…”
“Jesus, Tyler, could you just…SHUT UP? Please?”
Silence.
Justin heard the bed next to his squeak before he heard Tyler clear his throat.
“I’m just looking out for you. You’re my little brother after all.”
“Screw you. There’s nothing little about me.”
“Well, your dick comes to mind.”
“Jesus, you’re such a fucking asshole! Shouldn’t those pills have knocked you out by now?”
He heard Tyler giggle as he locked his phone and proceeded to turn around and face his brother.
“Wow, didn’t know you cared.”
“I fucking don’t.”
“Oh, I know you don’t. You wished I was dead and it very nearly happened.”
Fuck.
That was a low blow.
One that knowing Tyler, Justin knew was coming sooner or later.
More silence.
“Tyler?”
“Yeah?”
Silence.
“Dude! I’m pumped full of pain meds and I’m seriously going to fall asleep any moment, so if you have something to say, you better fucking say it,” Tyler murmured.
Justin licked nervously over his dry lips, before he cleared his throat.
“I just…I just want to say how…fuck man, you nearly died and that last thing I told you was…”
Tyler turned his head as much as he could towards his brother and his heart flipped as he realised that Justin was crying.
Justin never cries.
Tyler couldn’t remember the last time he had seen his younger sibling shed any tears. For all of his dramatic antics over the years, and for all the times they had fought like ancient warriors, Justin was a tough little kid. He was strong and cunning. Just like Tyler himself.
To see him cry and break down like this…
“Hey…heeeey! Come on man, you’re making me feel awkward here. How can I be angry at your ass if you fucking do that?” Tyler said, trying to make light of the situation.
That didn’t help much.
Tyler sighed.
Okay. Just…just leave it.
Let Justin get it all out.
Let him, as his mother always said…cleanse his soul. Apparently crying always cleanses the soul.
Justin angrily wiped away his tears, lambasting himself for crying in front of his older brother.
“I’m sorry…”
“It’s okay, bro…”
“No, it isn’t! I tell you I wish that you were dead and then…and then…”
“Wait, hold up, you didn’t know that that fucker was gonna drive straight into me! Or are you telepathic now?”
“FUCK YOU!”
“I thought you were sorry?”
Justin laid back down and his eyes flickered over his brother.
“I don’t want you to die…” he whispered, after what felt like literal ages.
Tyler looked back at him as best he could, and he winked and grinned.
“That’s a fucking relief…” he whispered.
“You’re such an asshole…” Justin smiled, before he reached over and switched off the bed light.
Both the Simmonds siblings were asleep in minutes.
**
“Hell no.”
Tyler threw his arm upwards, the one that wasn’t broken, as he stared at his brother in sheer disbelief.
“Look here, Mom TOLD you to help me if it was needed and FUCKING HELL I NEED IT!”
Justin rolled his eyes.
“I ain’t fucking helping you to piss, Tyler! That wasn’t part of the deal!”
“Listen here, you fuck face, if you don’t fucking help me, I’m gonna flood the floor and my bed and I’ll tell Mom and Dad that you refused to help me, so what’s your poison, brother?”
Fucking hell!
Justin groaned out loud as he sighed and placed both of his hands inside the pockets of his jeans.
“What do I need to do? FINE, I’ll help you! Once, nothing more!” he blasted as he frantically looked around the room at literally anything that wasn’t called Tyler.
Tyler winced as the pressure to relieve his bladder was probably getting worse by the passing second, before he quickly and sharply pointed to a plastic bottle standing on the side table next to his bed.
“Will you stop freaking out and just listen, it’s fucking easy enough!”
Justin gave his brother the finger, before grabbing the bottle and standing next to his bed.
“Okay, what now?”
Tyler looked like he might explode at any given second.
“What do you think? You need to take my trousers off, I can’t do it myself! HURRY!”
Jesus Christ.
Justin sighed, but he knew his brother needed him. It was true…throughout this entire ordeal, Tyler hadn’t asked anything of him, even once. Just his God damn luck, the one fucking afternoon that their mother had to go in to see a client, and his father had to attend a work interview, THIS happens.
Carefully, Justin reached out and grabbed the sides of the trousers that Tyler was wearing and he quickly and efficiently managed to lower it, until Tyler’s boxer briefs were exposed.
“That too?” he asked.
“No shit, that too!” came the reply.
“Gross, hold on,” Justin said before he took a huge breath, and grabbed the sides of the boxers and managed to lower them as well, exposing his brother’s limp teenage penis to himself and the rest of the room.
“Take a picture gay boy, it will last longer,” Tyler taunted him.
Justin scowled.
“Keep that up, I’ll walk away and let you rot in your own fucking piss.”
“You love me too much. HURRY UP!”
Wincing as he did so, Justin grabbed hold of his brother’s limp dick and his eyes widened as he realised how warm it was.
Wow.
He just realised what he was actually doing.
He was holding…his brother’s cock in his hands.
Jesus Christ, of course he had seen Tyler’s dick before…how can he not? They were brothers and they shared a room, and even before that, when they still had their huge house back in Houghton…as brothers it was inevitable that it would happen.
But to feel it’s warmth…to feel it’s girth…almost as if it was alive in the palm of his hands…
…his chest tightened to the point where he didn’t know if he could take his next breath.
“That’s it…now put the head in the bottle…that’s it…okay…oh my fucking god…” Tyler groaned as he finally allowed his bladder to empty itself.
The warm, yellowish urine flowed freely and without prejudice into the bottle that Justin was holding at every passing second. The relief, the sheer utter relief on Tyler’s face, was one that Justin would never forget.
His ripped stomach, barely visible under the duvet, tensed as he continued to take his piss. Soon, the bottle was nearly half full and with a sigh and a burp, the flow of urine finally stopped.
“Dude…thanks. Thanks so much, I was gonna burst soon…” Tyler whispered and grabbed Justin’s arm as he did so.
The warmth of his brother’s skin onto his own…another male…another boy…touching him so softly…so…so incredibly intimate at that…
Justin gasped for breath and immediately turned away from his brother. He ran to the toilet on the other side of the house, emptying the bottle and washing it out, before slowly walking back to the room that they both shared.
“You good?” he dared to ask…his voice shaking.
Tyler smirked at him, and laid back against the multiple of cushions their mother had packed on the bed for him.
“I’m great,” he softly replied.
**
“Justin! Justin!”
“Wh…wha…Tyler? TYLER? Is everything okay? Are you hurt, do you need your meds?”
“No, I just…Mom and Dad are asleep by now…can you help me again? Like we did the other day?”
Justin froze…and immediately felt goosebumps spread across the entirety of his skin.
This whole past week had been nothing but a sheer fucking nightmare. Ever since he had Tyler’s dick in his hands, and felt the powerful teenage organ relieve itself into that motherfucking jug, he hadn’t been able to think of anything else.
He even broke things off with Kyle, because he couldn’t figure out what the hell was happening, why he was feeling what he was feeling. Not that Kyle seemed to mind, and that hurt more than anything else.
He had a nagging feeling that Tyler had been right. That Kyle had just been using him for sex, when he couldn’t get it from his girlfriend.
But it still stung like a mother fucker.
But that was the least of his worries right now…more to the point, why did he desperately want to have another feel of his big brother’s cock in his hands…in his mouth…
“Justin, sorry, but I really need your help, brother…”
“I’ll do it, okay? Just wait a second!”
Justin grabbed the now infamous plastic bottle that he so hoped he would never have to use again for this sort of purpose, before he approached Tyler’s bed. With his healthy arm, Tyler barely managed to lower the trousers of the pyjamas that he was wearing, leaving only his boxers for Justin.
“Sorry, brother…” he whispered, looking straight at Justin as he said it.
Justin swallowed.
His brother’s eyes were blue, just like his own. Unlike his caramel brown hair, Tyler’s were jet-black and were falling over his eyes.
He looked vulnerable as shit.
He looked embarrassed as anything.
He looked sexy as hell.
They went through the entire ritual just as they did the last time, and this time, Justin remembered to grab some tissues to clean the final drops of Tyler’s dick as he finished his piss.
Justin shuddered as the smell infiltrated his nostrils, before he rushed across the hallway to empty and wash said bottle, before swiftly returning to their room.
“Tyler, what the hell?” he breathed as he realised that his brother was trying his best to jerk himself off with his left hand, which of course wasn’t working out so well as we all know it tended to do.
Tyler groaned out loud and Justin quickly closed the bedroom door before he woke their parents because if they were to come in here and see THIS…
…he didn’t even wanna think about it.
Tyler looked at him with desperate eyes.
“Justin, for fuck sake, it’s been eight weeks…” he uttered.
“You’re not jacking off with me right here, brother!” Justin hissed.
Tyler slumped against his pillows, before he sighed and looked slowly down from his rapidly softening dick, towards Justin, in sheer expectation.
“Please, Justin…” he whispered.
“Please Justin what…oh hell no, FORGET IT! NO! I ain’t jacking off my own brother!” Justin hissed towards Tyler.
Tyler sighed and rolled his eyes.
“Dude, be real, will you? Look, we both have dicks, right? Just pretend it’s yours.”
“Are you insane? I’m not jacking you off! Get Lauren to do it!”
“But you’re here now and Lauren is asleep at home…”
Justin hovered.
His eyes, whether he wanted to or not, flickered once more towards Tyler’s penis.
Jesus.
Will…will it really be so bad?
And then Tyler played his trump card.
“Don’t be mad at me for saying this but…you’re gay, right? It ain’t supposed to freak you out touching a dick, bro!”
“YOU’RE NOT ANYONE, YOU’RE MY BROTHER!”
“A dick is a dick, Justin, please! My balls are literally aching here!”
“FINE! FUCK!”
Justin walked over towards Tyler’s bed as fast as he could, before he sat down. He grabbed Tyler’s limp nineteen-year-old dick and once more, he felt elated at feeling the warm appendage in his hand. He lightly squeezed the phallus, eliciting a giant groan from his brother.
“Shut up! You want Mom and Dad to see this?”
“That’s kinda kinky…”
“You’re such an asshole! Just keep quiet and let me fucking do this!”
Tyler smiled and laid back, exposing his lower half of his body totally towards his younger brother. Justin swallowed some pent-up saliva and began his job…proceeding to draw back the lose foreskin around the head of his brother’s cock.
“Holy shit…been so long…” Tyler murmured as if in sheer ecstasy.
Like a marionet puppet attached to a string, both brothers watched as if in awe, how the limp teenaged cock evolved, transformed…from a raw noodle to a steel hard seven incher ready and able for action after weeks of inactivity.
Oh my God, Tyler was so hard.
His cock was SO hard.
It was much like jerking himself off, Justin thought, apart from being about two inches longer than his own, their dicks looked very much the same.
He gripped Tyler’s dick tighter, and he felt a sense of pride…yes, that’s what it was, when he saw how much Tyler was enjoying what he as doing.
Up…down…up…down…
As if in a dream, Justin revelled in seeing Tyler’s cockhead appear, only to disappear every few seconds as he continued to masturbate his brother the best that he could. Tyler’s eyes by now were rolling back in their sockets as his dick finally got some action after more than two months of nothingness.
As if in sheer instinct, Justin’s hand caressed Tyler’s rock-hard cock, and in the same breath, allowed it to wander down to his balls, feeling the two egg shaped baby makers in their full and utter capacity, alert at how full they were.
He was amazed that Tyler was actually allowing this. He must have been horny as hell.
Making his way back upwards to Tyler’s stiff phallus, he continued with his sexual manipulations of the steel hard teenage cock, by now dripping, drowning his fingers with the pre cummy goodness that seemed to just OOZE with his flaring piss slit.
“Brother, I’m close…I’m really, really close…” Tyler whispered and Justin blinked a couple of times, as if he was being forced to remember who he was and just WHAT he was busy doing.
Tyler was so hot…at last he was able to admit it, after all these weeks.
His brother was so God damn handsome that it literally killed him.
Is that why he was so hateful towards him all these years?
Is that why they could never see eye to eye?
Because of some deep level shit, he knew that he found Tyler attractive and fighting with him, was the only way that he could deal with it?
Was that it?
Up…down…up…down…
“Gonna cum, Justin. Fucking hell, Justin…oh my god, oh my GOD!”
Justin gasped as Tyler arched his back deep into the mattress, before sheer globules and globules of potent pent-up teenage sperm volleyed themselves out of Tyler’s cock. Two months of sheer and utter stress gone and relief in a fucking instant.
His fingers were drenched with the stuff. It felt it was all over the place. The smell was intense, really intense, so much so that his mouth started to water, wanting to see what Tyler’s cum tasted like.
It scared the shit out of him; just how eager he was to put his mouth over that cockhead and suck it all out.
He continued to milk his brother’s dick until there was nothing more left to give, before he stood up and grabbed the nearest box of tissues that he could find, wiping his brother’s sperm from the entirety of his fingers.
Neither brother spoke.
It was like not one of the two suddenly knew what to say.
It felt like this was the most awkward exchange of passage that either had never encountered.
Justin cleared his throat and dumped the used tissues in the bin, placing some before Tyler to clean up the rest of the mess, before he slowly made his way over towards his own bed.
The silence was deafening.
“Justin?”
Silence.
“Justin?”
“What?”
Silence.
He then heard Tyler sigh, the sound eliciting fear across his young teenaged heart.
“Nothing. Sleep well,” was all that his brother said.
Justin’s heartbeat was on sudden full red alert, if it wasn’t before.
God…he had just jerked off his own brother.
It was wrong…Jesus, it was SO wrong, on SO many levels, it wasn’t even funny.
But as he closed his eyes, one thing was for damn sure.
He would do it again, in a heartbeat.
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