A Family Affair

The next week was rough, as it was every year. Milo stood over the grave at the bronze plaque. He knew John would be at work to distract himself, but Milo couldn’t bring himself to do the same. Despite the cooler weather, the sun was shining brightly, casting dark shadows over the small area. Milo looked around at the bright landscape, the flowers dotting each grave that stretched for yards on both sides of him. It was a huge cemetery, but Milo was glad it was relatively empty today. It was a scene he could imagine his mother painting.

He placed the yellow daffodils in the bronze vase above her name. He only had a few memories of her, as she died when he was still a young child. But one memory he had was of her painting a field of yellow daffodils. “They symbolizing new beginnings,” she told him. Unfortunately, he couldn’t remember what happened to it. It wasn’t in his closet with the rest of her works, nor in the attic with the rest of her belongings that his father couldn’t part with. 

He stared at the dates. He remembered her warm smile and laugh, her playing with him and his brothers. They both used to call her mom, even though Ryan and Tyler had different mothers. But once she passed away, Ryan started calling her Melissa. No one brought it up, but Milo noticed it.

Speaking of his brothers, a part of him wondered what would happen if she were still alive. Would she know the true nature of the boys’ relationship? Would she be disgusted in them? A part of him was glad she wasn’t around to guess anything of the sorts with them. John still seemed to not know. Maybe Ryan was correct, it was time for them to live a “normal” life.

Just then, his phone alarm went off. Milo sighed and headed back to his car. The last place he wanted to be was school, but he was taking an exam today and would need to be there. He drove home to retrieve his backpack, having forgot to grab it before he went to buy flowers. However, as he pulled into the driveway, he noticed John’s car was still in the driveway. He should have left for work by now. Plus, Ryan was back at his own house, so no one should had been home.

He looked check the garage and backyard, not seeing John anywhere. He passed by the bedroom and heard the TV still on. There he was, still under the covers.

“You not going to work today?”

John cleared his throat. “Naw, don’t feel well.”

The room was dark, the windows not open to let any sunlight in. There were no lamps on. It wasn’t like him to just sit in a room in total darkness, even if he was sick. Even if he stayed home, he would have been in the garden, perhaps tended to the yellow daffodils he planted a few years ago.

“Do you need anything? Medicine?”

John was quiet and he seemed to rub his eyes. “No, I’m good. Do you have class today?”

“Yeah in a few minutes.”

Milo stood in the doorway, barely able to see John’s face in the pale light from the tv screen. He took a step forward into the room. It was an old movie, perhaps one from the 70s. He couldn’t recall what it was, but it was possible John just had it on for noise.

“You sure you’re okay?”

This time he was much closer, and John stared at him. The same deep look in his eyes that Milo was noticing more lately. He couldn’t tell if it was adoration or worry.

“Yeah,” he whispered. But Milo could tell he wasn’t. In fact, his whole demeanor was similar to that dark period right after his mother died. He had become despondent and withdrawn, barely speaking to any of the boys. That’s when their grandfather, Gerald, came to take care of them for a while.

Milo retreated from the room and headed to the kitchen. Perhaps a beer would cheer John up, or at least make him a bit more responsive. He opened the fridge and paused. He thought about staying home, too. Sure, he needed to go to class and do his exam, but this seemed more important. Besides, biology was the last place he wanted to be right now. He quickly sent off an email claiming he was sick and shut his phone off. He then grabbed two beers and headed back to his father’s room.

He knocked on the door and crossed over to the bed. “Here, this might help.” He then kicked off his shoes and climbed into the bed beside him. But his father simply stared at him.

“You’re gonna be late,” was all he said.

“It’s okay. I can miss today.” It was a lie, but he couldn't care less at the moment. When his father still didn’t move, Milo got a cold feeling in his stomach. “I’m sorry, I’ll leave you alone.”

His father reached out to him. “No, no, stay.” He pulled Milo back against him, an arm around his shoulders. Milo opened his beer and snuggle against him. He could see the outline of his cock  underneath the sheets, and Milo thought about getting undressed as well.

“I’ll never do anything to hurt you.”

The words were softly spoken and Milo raised his head to see that intense stare again.

“I know,” he said. The men stared at each other, Milo looking from his father’s lips back to his eyes. Finally, his father opened his beer and took a sip, holding Milo close to his side. Milo followed suit and laid his head on his chest, listening to his soft breathing. A few minutes went by before his father spoke again.

“If you want to get comfortable, you can.”

Milo sat up and sat his can on the side table. He quickly undressed, wearing only his underwear, this time tight blue briefs. He hooked his thumbs in the waistband and debated for a few seconds before he took them off. Might as well match his father’s state of undress. He climbed back in bed and resumed his position. His father placed a pillow on his lap and then tightened his squeeze around Milo. He placed a kiss on his temple and took another sip of his beer.

Milo felt more comfortable and at peace than he had for a while.

One beer turned into three, then four and soon the men were laughing and reminiscing over fond memories. Some were embarrassing stories of Milo’s childhood. Milo would hid his face with a pillow as his dad teased him. But soon, both men fell asleep in each other’s arms.

Milo woke up hours later, the TV still on. He looked around and realized he was alone but still on his father’s bed. It took him a few minutes to remember all the beers they shared. He tried to remember if anything transpired between them, if Milo had made any wrong move. But all he could remember were feeling strong arms around him and feeling at peace. It was a warm feeling and he could smell his father’s scent on the pillows beside him. The sheets smelled like him and he breathed deeply, letting it envelop him. He slowly rose from the bed and went to the kitchen, his stomach grumbling halfway there.

He found his father in the kitchen cleaning up, but this time back in his usual underwear. Milo was still nude but he figured it didn’t matter. He opened the fridge and began pulling out left overs.

“How you feel?”

“I’m feel great. Well, I’m hungry and drank too much, but besides that I feel fine. What about you?” He popped a plate in the microwave.

His father didn’t turn around but had paused in his dish washing. “I’m alright. If you’re alright.”

He looked over his shoulder. Milo crossed over to him.

“Yeah, I’m fine. What’s wrong?”

His father looked him up and down, his eyes slowly roaming over Milo’s body. The overhead light made his blond hair even lighter. Milo looked up at him and thought his father looked almost ethereal.

“Nothing. I just want to make sure you don’t think I…that you still feel safe.”

“Why wouldn’t I?”

His father shook his head. “I’m glad you're feeling better.”

The microwave rang, and Milo retrieved his food.

“Maybe we can do it again one day?”

His father slowly turned around. The sinking feeling returned and Milo opened his mouth to apologize. But his father grabbed him into a tight hug. Milo hugged him back and breathed in the warm scent he woke up to just minutes before.

“Of course we can.”