Public Exposure: Nudity Eclipse

Posted 24 Aug 2017

You're going to want to get special glasses to safely view naked men in public. Otherwise you'll burn out your sexual retinas. Luckily these special glasses are widely available.

And they're called eyelids and neck muscles. Basically just close your eyes and turn away as needed so as not to fill your pants with ejaculate. Unless you're into that. Then stare away.

In the scale of bravery, from parroting horrendous statements of the patriarchy being of zero bravery to performing live at the Super Bowl halftime show, staring a naked guy is not the most brave thing but it's in that direction. 

Confession: I kept trying to spell it Superbowl because football is a mystery. I do know it causes a lot of head injuries and generates a lot of dirty laundry.

So really the risk of staring at the naked guy is not from the naked guy but of people staring at you staring at the naked guy. So probably the best thing to do is for you to also be naked, so then the person watching you is at risk of being caught staring at a naked guy.

Until there's nobody left to be pissed off by it all and you end up with that mass of naked people. Though it can look more exciting if there are clothed people nearby. Otherwise naked is just naked. 

And naked motorcycle riding is naked motorcycle riding. I think Gandhi said that. He wasn't good at punchlines. Just massive political change. Something you may be in the mood for right now yourself. But let's keep the naked men in public thing.