Flashback: Naked for the Win

I have no idea what competition those guys are involved in on stage. Though I'd guess it's the "Stand There Goofily While Naked and Shiny Pageant 1975". In that sense, they are all winners.

And if you're into that kind of thing, you're a winner too.

While the guy at the bottom left is basically a knockoff of mainstream beefcake actor Robert Conrad, minus the acting abilities. It must have been strange to look like a celebrity but only be seen by folks seeking out porn.

Not exactly A List success, but I'd rather cuddle with the model than the egotistical actor. Or really both would have been good. And not cuddling so much as wrestling. And not so much wrestling as tongue wrestling. My dreams are classy.

Yikes, I just realized the guys on stage are in footwear and all wearing medals. Clearly this is the Nude Olympics. Or maybe a footwear modeling competition in which they didn't want the distraction of clothing. We will just never know for sure.

Now let us marvel at the lighting direction of the middle and bottom right photos. Somebody is talented. I think I need a lighting director to be with me at all times. And maybe I could always be in front of some artistic backdrop.

That would help me make more of an impact, like if I go out to naked coffee with someone, my team can come with me and display me at my best, of course including a medal around my neck and plenty of body oil. It's good to take inspiration from the naked past.

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