Flashback: Dirty Gay Magazines

Print gay porn is mostly dead I guess, though some titles are still around. Maybe it could be revived if people thought of each magazine as a tablet computer with extremely realistic page turning abilities, a convincing paper texture feel, and a massive bug that didn't allow the internet to load for some reason.

Basically, these are tablets stuck on an individual porn mag file, but with the benefits of infinite battery life and semen absorption. Just try to get some ejaculate on your tablet and it won't soak in at all. A tablet has zero ability to capture your DNA for decades like magazines can and there are no pages to stick together.

But if you find a porn shop (or someone online selling their collection, or their father's collection they found after he died) sometimes they may offer used mags including of-the-era stuck together pages. Classy!

You could Jurassic Park the situation, extract the DNA and build yourself a vintage gay 1970s clone, mustache and all, who had been enjoying the mag. As a bonus, he'd be quite satisfied to masturbate to the same magazine he had originally. Tastes don't tend to change when you've taken a break from existing.

Though I suppose that would possibly mean two of the same person being alive at the same time, one of them quite a bit older. Of all the potential disasters cloning could cause, I'm prepared to risk it if it means adding someone back to the mix of humanity who had purchased Muscles a Go-Go.