Toby's Journal

For the next hour or so mom and I examined all the ceiling fans that Ted had replaced in the house (it was more like I examined, and mom sat down and drank her Vodka tonics) but the search came up nil.  Once we here done, I said to my mom that wasn’t lying and that he just wanted to make sure I was not on drugs.  

She just took long sip of her drink and said, “maybe it was to watch you do something else?”  

I said, “like what all I do in my room is homework, change clothes, watch tv, play video games, and sleep.” I kind of know where mom was going but I wanted to make sure by saying “like what mom, I don’t have much time for anything.”  

Mom just said, “you know what I mean Sean Tobias, that thing boys you age do either early in the morning or late at night with a flashlight and a girlie magazine under the covers.”

I just said, “Jesus mom. That’s not a conversation a mother should have with her son, his dad maybe, but definitely not with my mother and if you must know I never had that conversation with Ted.  I learned all about it at that all-male Catholic school you sent me to.  Horny hormonal adolescents going through puberty and all.”

Mom just said “ok.  I need another drink and a smoke.  Come join me, Sean Tobias.”

I said to her that the hour was late, and we both have an early day at the school tomorrow.  She just said “have one drink with your mom.”

We went into dad’s old office that Ted occupies and she poured herself a drink and me as well.  We raised our glasses and said “sláinte” and mom lit up a smoke.  I asked her for one and she gave me one.

We drank and smoked in the office, and she said “you know Ted is gay? Right.”

I took a sip of my drink as I thought, then a puff of mine and said, “I have had my suspicions about him for a very long time in that you and him never make love to one another, I don’t have any siblings, so either his is sterile, had your tubes tied, or something else, and I don’t see you as the lesbian type mom but if you are then I am totally cool with that.”

Mom laughs a bit and said to me, “I did raise a very smart and yet very stubborn boy and you are right the hour is late.  Have a good night, Toby, see you tomorrow.”

Mom and I hugged and went to our rooms to get ready for bed and I was about to leave I turned around and asked her, “so why did you marry him?”

Mom just said coldly, “good night Sean Tobias, I’ll see you tomorrow.”

I took that she did not want to talk about it and went up to my room and got ready for bed. 

The next morning, I was up at 5:30 am as usual but this time I skipped out on my morning run and just got dressed for school, packed my lacrosse gear as well as my book bag and the paperwork needed to clear me to play lacrosse, and ate breakfast.  

Around six in the morning mom came down as well looking all fit and proper as if she is not a woman to be trifled with.  She asked me to make a strong black coffee for her, which I did.  We ate breakfast together and when the time came, she drove us to school.

We went in and headed immediacy went to the school’s admin office where I gave them my paperwork and requested a decal for my car so I could park it on campus.  

The snooty receptionist told me that it would cost me two hundred dollars for me to park in the lot.  I tried to debate with here in that the school year ends in a few weeks and that it should be pro-rated but the mindless bureaucrat just said to me $200.00 or that they will have it towed away.

I got in her face and said “I looked it up and it costs $200 for my car to park on campus for a full school year, and after that it is prorated and since it is after Spring Break it only costs $25.00 so here is an Andrew Jackson and an Abe Lincoln for my car fee”, and as I passed the cash to her I added “I want a receipt for that as well”.

I watched as ‘Miss Snooty McSnootypants’ take my cash, issued a parking sticker and a receipt, and once the cash transaction was done, mom and I went to the school’s nurses office and gave the other mindless school bureaucrat my medical clearance paperwork to clear me to play lacrosse.  She just stared at me blankly said “the nurse is out sick today, give it to her tomorrow.”

Now I was getting really upset and said, “no, her illness is not my personal problem and it's not like you all cared a lot about mine either when I was in the hospital last week, I never got a fruit basket or flowers from you all, but now you have signed documentation from my doctor and my mother to say I am medically fit to play lacrosse and my mother is right here to attest to it so you could either accept them, date and time stamp them, give me a receipt that you accepted them or should I have my mother call our lawyer about it."

The mindless school bureaucrat just said “there is no need for that Sean.  I’ll time stamp it and give you a receipt that we received it, and sorry about not sending you a fruit basket, it because off . . ”

I just said "fucking budget cuts I know.  Maybe if I took up football instead things would be different" and as she passed me the receipt I corrected her and said “Toby, I go by Toby and thank you ma’am.”

After the paperwork was done mom and I went to school’s admin offices where at Coach Wilson told me to go.  Mom and I take a seat outside of it and when we get there we hear a lot of yelling from behind the door and I swear it was Jake’s voice that was doing the yelling as well another voice.

I could not make out much of the conversation but I could tell it was pretty intense and after a few minutes of hearing it, the office door quickly opened up and Jake barged out of it and being followed my an elderly gentleman that I could only guess was his dad.

I stood and said “hey Jake, what up?  I heard all the shouting in there.  What’s going on?”

Jake just looked at me with anger and had tears in his eyes and said “I’m being fucking suspended Toby, that’s what up and off the lacrosse team.  The fucking interim coach jacks off right in front of me while he thought I’m sleeping so I punched him in his nads and in the eye and ran like hell out of the room that we were bunked together in. . . “

Coach Wilson came out and said, “that’s enough Jake, you can’t talk about it.”

The elderly man who is Jake with on his cell phone says “my ass he can’t.  You have some homo pervo coach working here that likes to jack off in front of the male athletes he is supposed to coach and . . “

Coach Wilson yelled out “that’s enough Mister Smith, this issue is still under investigation.”

Jake’s dad said “my ass it is, it just means you all bury it and reassign the pervert.  Come on Jake, let’s go.  And Coach Wilson, expect to hear from my lawyer soon.”

Jake and his dad left while mom and I just silently looked at one another before Coach Wilson said, Toby. Mrs. O’Malley we are ready for you.”  Mom just stared at him and said, “it’s Mrs. Williams, I am remarried now and are you the son-of-a-bitch that made my son run lapses around the field in almost 100-degree heat in full athletic gear because my son was thirty seconds late to catch the team bus back home and because of that it put him in the hospital?”

Coach Wilson stammered a bit before saying, “I expect punctuality from all my players and that includes your son.”

Mom wasn’t having any of Coach Wilson’s excuse by saying, “and the boy who saved my son’s life, the one you just suspended and took off the team, was he on time?”

Coach Wilson got a bit nervous “he was ma’am” but mom interjected to say “It’s Mrs. Williams to you Coach Wilson.” Coach apologized and said, “yes Mrs. Williams. And yes Jake was on time but since I expect my players to look out after their roommate on the road, so yes I gave Jake the same punishment as well just to make sure that it never happens again.”

Mom got a bit irate and quickly slapped Coach Wilson on the cheek and said “then you are not responsible for the actions of your underling regardless if you were present or not?"

Coach Wilson had no immediate answer to mom's question and just stammered a bit like an idiot until  mom said "now I am going to have a quick cigarette before this inquisition of my son begins unless I can smoke in the building?”

Mom quickly got up to leave when Coach Wilson said while rubbing his reddening cheek and said “ma’am, I mean Mrs. Williams, this is a smoke-free campus and the AD’s and the school principal’s time is limited as we are still conducting interviews of the players so can you wait ‘til afterwards?”

Mom went all Irish on Coach Wilson’s ass and said “and my time is limited as Mr. Wilson but for right fucking now they can wait five fucking minutes.  Sean Tobias, stay here and speak to no one until I return” and then went off outside to light one up to smoke.

I sat outside the room and ten minutes later mom returns.  I opened the door for her, and we sat in the principal’s office.  Coach Wilson was there along with school’s principal, the athletic director, and some other school official that I do not recognize.

The principal started off my saying “Toby, Mrs. O'Malley hopefully this will not take long, and we are running a bit behind schedule as it is” and I swore mom uttered silently to herself “cunt”.

The principal and the AD asked me some questions about now former Coach Morrow and if in any way did he act inappropriately towards me or any other player.  I told them that not to my knowledge.

They went on to ask some other questions for which I had no real answers to because I wasn’t on the away game trip and wasn’t allowed to go because of budget cuts.

The AD said that we were done and that we could go.

I stood and said “is it school policy to have coach share the same room with a player and they said not usually.  I then asked who makes the arrangements.  Coach Wilson said “it’s usually the coach’s choice at check in time and we tend to put players who have a good partnership with one another.

I then said to Coach Wilson, “I see just like you paired Jake and I up, because we are the newbies and all.  So why wasn’t Jake paired up with another player then and with Morrow?  Isn’t that against school policy and if not, it should be?”

Coach Wilson just said, “I don’t know.  That was Coach Morrow’s choice.  I wasn’t there, Toby, Mrs. Williams, so I don’t know.  We are still looking into it.  Is there anything else?”

I got irate in that I am not buying their weak answers “so what of Jake, is it true that he was suspended, off the team?  

“He probably saved my life last week and now you are now fucking suspending him for racking a pervert coach in the balls who was jacking off in front of him!

"And why the fuck not was a police report filed?  The adult pervert coach was caught beating off in front of an underaged student!”

The principal got irate and said, “in these type of matters it was decided that it should be dealt with in-house and not get the authorities involved but do mind your tongue Mr. O’Malley, we are trying to get to the bottom of this as well but for right now it’s Jake’s word against Coach Morrow’s.”

I get pissed off some more by saying, “and what fucking happens to Morrow?  Is he going to be reassigned to another school in the district where he can do the same thing again to another player? Or maybe something more?”

The principal now got really irate with me again and said, “I warned you before about your language Mr. O’Malley so watch your mouth or I’ll suspend you as well for insubordination.  I cannot comment on Coach Morrow because it is a private matter with this board as well as . . .”

I got sarcastic and said, “yeah, yeah, it’s still under investigation and by the way I’m medically cleared to play lacrosse, here is the receipt that I submitted” as I waved the paper in their faces and added, “but if Jake is not on the team then neither and I.  I quit it and I am sure there may be a few players who will as well.”

Coach Wilson then said, “this a confidential meeting Toby, you can’t talk about it.”

Mom then chimed and said “my fucking ass he can’t.  This is not a court of law, and no judge has issued a gag order so my son can talk about what happened here if he wishes, that is his constitutional right to do so and if he won’t I sure a fuck will and sue your asses for infringing on them.  You all are trying to keep this under the rug, aren’t you.”

The principal then said, “we are done here Mrs. O'Malley, Mr. O’Malley, classes are staring soon so it’s better if you get to them.”

Mom said, “my ass he is going to classes today, he recently experienced a medical issue with his heart.”

I took mom’s signal and added, “yeah I feel my pulse racing right now, and I forgot to take my meds this morning so who knows what my BP is right now and feeling a bit light headed.”

The AD said “of course, we’ll get the school nurse in here right now to check him out.”

Mom said “my fucking ass she will, I’ll take him to his doctor right now and maybe tomorrow he’ll be back at school or should I sue you asses for that as well.”

The principal said, “of course Mrs. O’Malley, Toby is excused for the rest of the day now if that is all?”

Mom then got irate again and said to the DEI hire of a principal, “it’s Mrs. Williams.  I remarried so please don’t fucking forget that the next time I must be dragged into another meeting with you when it pertains to my son.” 

After I heard that I just got up and said “yup. Mom we are done here. Thanks for nothing except suspending my teammate and friend for something that I would have done in his place in that if I saw some homo perv coach jacking off inches from my face I would have punched him in the balls as well, but I would have torn them off, and crammed them down his throat but that’s just me. Good day.”

Mom and I left the offices and she said to me “very impressive Sean Tobias, you can hold your own in tough situations.”

I just said “I learned from the best teacher now mind holding on some, I need to clean out by gym locker.  I’m not playing until Jake is allowed to. Period.”

Mom said “if that is what you want Toby.  I admire your loyalty to your friend, and I stand by your decision.  I know how much it means to you.  I’ll be outside waiting.”

I just said back to her “he saved my life mom, so I owe him.  It wouldn’t be right if I kept playing lacrosse but not him, the Irish Catholic guilt would be too much for me to enjoy the game. I’ll be right back.”

I went to my gym locker and emptied it out.  As I was leaving it, I grabbed my lacrosse bag and saw that Jake’s was still there.  I guessed that he was in a hurry to leave the school after being suspended so he left it behind.  I gave him a call, but he didn’t answer so I shot him a text message to say that I’ll bring his bag to his home and that I quit the team in protest.

I lugged the lacrosse gear bags and my book bag to mom’s car.  She was on the phone with Ted smoking a cigarette telling him about the whole situation and how well I handled myself and what the school did to Jake.  I loaded Jake’s and my gear in the car and we drove home.

As we were driving my mom said as she was lighting up a cigarette and said, “and I thought the Church was bad about dealing with pervert priests but public schools do take the cake on that Sean Tobias.  It’s like every other week I am reading about on the news about a public-school teacher either molesting or raping a student.  I hope that one has not done that to you Sean Tobias.”

I just said, “no mom, no coach, teacher or priest molested me.”  She just said, “thank god they haven’t.”

As we drove to the house, mom and I saw that Ted’s car was parked in the garage, he was back from spending the night at his lake house.  Mom just said, “what the fuck is he here doing here especially after the shit he pulled with you Toby.”

Both mom and I went to the house and mom shouted, “Ted where the hell are you!”

I heard Ted’s voice say “I’m in the office.  I can’t do my work from the lake house, and if I can’t work the mortgage cannot be paid.”

Mom and I went into dad’s old office that Ted now “occupies”.  He got up from dad’s desk, a family heirloom that has been passed down to the eldest male that was handmade in County Cork, but Ted didn’t care much for it in that he just saw it a piece of furniture.

Ted apologized to mom and I for having a hidden camera in my room and stated again that he just wanted to make sure that I wasn’t doing drugs considering it is the most common death for men of my age.”

Mom got pissed off when she heard that and started to say something but I just interjected and said in our native tongue and one that Ted would not understand “’mháthair Déileálfaidh mé leis seo’” and I did by getting right in front of Ted’s face, and since I stood a good five inches taller than him I just coldly and angrily said “what other videos do you have recorded of me Ted?!  Of me showering!?  Of me jacking off to porn in my room?!, What fucking other video Ted?

"Mom call the cops and your lawyer and get them here now.  After what I tell them about the hidden camera in my room, I am sure they will want to have a look at what files Ted has on his computer.  Do it now mom!!”

I stared down Ted to see that he was getting very nervous and sweating some and said “ok Toby you win, I’ll delete them now.”

I just said “no you won’t I will, just sign on to your computer and I know under which file you have it under or does mom call the cops?  We are family Ted and like to keep these sorts of matters in-house and deal with them a private matter so now log the fuck on to it.”

Ted did and I stood over him while mom poured herself a drink and lit up a cigarette in the office.

Ted was about to tell her not to but the look that mom gave him made him back off and just continued to log on to his computer first by saying “Hello Mother” and then punching in six-digit pin number and then saying to me, “ok Toby go ahead and delete the files.”

I did the file search of Ted’s computer and all the video files that he had on there were gone.  A million thoughts went through my head and he just to put this issue behind us all for now “they are gone mom.  Ted must have deleted them while we were at the school.”

Mom just said, “how does Sean Tobias know Ted, you could have backed them up elsewhere.”

Ted said, “no more. I swear Kathleen and there is no back up.  All files are gone.  I swear to God and my mother there is no other copy.”

Mom just said, “you better be right about that Ted so if what you said is true” as she got close to him and slapped him hard in the face and said, “you sleep either in the office or in the basement for now” and quickly departed to her bedroom.

Ted and I just stood in his office silently for a moment until I said “you better be telling the truth Ted that the video files are deleted because now I know that you had them on me, mom, Jim Pedersen, and of my dad, am I right?

 
“With me being ‘STO’ or Sean Tobias O’Malley, my mother Kathleen Ryan O’Malley whose initials are ‘KRO’, James Mads Pedersen who is my Godfather and initials are ‘JMP’ and then was is the one file labeled ‘PSO’? I was probably after my dead father Patrick Sean O’Malley? So fucking tell me Ted why do or now did have video files of them?”

Ted then got really nervous and said “it doesn’t matter now Toby.  They are gone, deleted, so you will never know.”

I just said angrily to Ted, “a man like you Ted always has a backup but you swore on your dead mother that they are gone and for us O’Malley’s a man’s word is his bond or there will be consequences if it is broken especially by a ‘Sassenach’ like you  but now I need to attend to other matters.”

As I was leaving Ted’s office he just shouted “I really fucking hate it when you and your mother use that ‘Mick’ language in front of me.”

I just coldly said “it is because of people like you that are the reason why I keep my mother’s, my late father’s, and my native language alive so maybe you should fucking attempt to learn our ‘Mick Language’ Ted.”

I then went to mom’s car and grabbed both Jake’s and mine lacrosse bag from it and put them in mine, then drove off to his house.  He had an address tag on it so I punched it in on the council in the car and drove to his house.

I just waited in my car, checking my cell phone and saw a text message  from Jeff, the lacrosse team captain and he was asking that was it true that I quit the team and why? Was it my medical issue?

I just replied to back no. I have been cleared to play but because Jake got suspended and was kicked off the team so if he doesn’t play then I don’t play.

He texted back saying that he didn’t know that Jake was suspended and kicked off the team and later added “I was there.  He knocked on my door first and then he, Brett and I went around and knocked on the other guys doors.  Jake did the right thing.”

I just replied, “the word will get out:  Jake is suspended and off the team.  I will not play unless he is reinstated.  I owe him my life.”

The lacrosse team captain texted back: “we were on that trip as well and the word is out. Hang tight brother we will get Jake back on the team one way or another.” 

I just replied “thanks”.

I sat in my car, and it was not until an hour later that I saw Jake’s car drive up into his driveway.  He got out and was about to head into his house when I got out of mine and as he was about to enter it, I shouted “hey ‘Scoundrel’ did you leave something behind at school today?” as I went to the trunk of my car and pulled his gear bag from it.

Jake just looked around at me and said “nice ride ‘Crop-Boy’, is it your mom’s?”

I just said “nope. Mine. An early birthday present from my stepdad.  Is it true what you said happened on the trip?”

He just said “it’s been a bitch of a past few days Toby and I am so fucking glad to see you now.  You should have been on that trip in that then none of this would have happened to me” as he approached me with tears in his eyes and hugged me. 

I deeply hugged Jake back and said “I know Jake.  Same for me” and started to tear up as well as we gave one another one long hug . .

Eventually Jake broke off our hug and he just said “I just spent the past few hours talking to my dad’s lawyers, the local cops and talking to the cops in the away team’s town about what happened in the hotel room.  I just don’t want to talk or can’t about it anymore.”

I just said, “I understand Jake but if you are not on the team, then I’m not playing either even though I medically cleared to do so.”

Jake asked me “why’s that? This is when colleges are scouting players Toby, you shouldn’t have done that.”

I just said to Jake “It would not be the right thing to me Jake, you are my teammate and also my friend, and God hope that you consider me one as well but I am not worried about lacrosse scholarships, my dad made sure I was set up so to me it’s a sacrifice worth making.

“And the way the Coach Wilson, the AD, and that idiot DEI hire of a principal were this morning I could tell they want to keep the situation quiet and goddammit Jake I am not.  I owe you my life an see you as a brother so if you don’t play then I don’t either.”
I looked at Jake and all he could say was “you are my friend Toby and thanks for having my back Crop-Boy.”

I said “always Scoundrel” as we both stood and hugged one another.
As we were hugging my cell went off and I saw that it was Jeff, the lacrosse team captain calling me.

 
I answered it.  

He told me that he held a “Player’s Only” meeting with the team that Coach Wilson was not a part of and in light of Jake’s predicament and the “situation” that occurred with Jake on the road trip, they all decided to resign from the team as well in protest but that they are still practicing after school but in a public park close by.

I told Jeff that I was with Jake now and that I will pass on the news to him and hung up the call.
I then relayed the message to Jake and he was a bit shocked by the news that his other teammates did that for him and he teared up some.

I just said “so do you want to sit on your ass playing video games and jerking off to  BustyAsianBeauties.com and wallow in misery or do want to go out and let off some steam with your brothers?”

I saw Jake smile for once and said “let’s get geared up.”. .