Toby's Journal

Dr. Jim and I talked for an hour or so, I know because I was getting text messages, and then calls from my mom asking me when I would be done with Dr. Jim in that Ted needs to get back home to be on a conference call soon.  Dr. Jim asked me if that was Kathy on the phone and I said yeah.  He then goes on to tell me that they used to date at one time, before she met my father and yeah, she could be a pistol at times.

Dr. Jim went on to tell me what my options were for treatments as well as testing such as having a stress test done, seeing a sports cardiologist, as well as prescribing medications to control my heart beat, lay off the Red Bulls, and then offered to email my mom and Ted on the information.

I asked if he could just email me instead, and while he had reservations by keeping my mom and Ted out of the loop, he agreed in that is just looking out for his Godson and that is something Patrick would expect him to do.  I said thank.

 Dr. Jim and I just chatted for a few more minutes where he told a quick story about my parents met.  I was shocked when I heard it and then excused myself, gave my Godfather a hug, and as I was leaving his office, he said to me “let’s just hope that you have AHS because I’m looking forward to seeing you back on the lacrosse field soon Toby.”

As I left Dr. Jim’s office, mom being my mom was all in my face about what we talked about in there alone.  I just said in a cold hard stare to her “I was a private conversation between a physician and his patient and a chat with my Godfather as well.

 I didn’t know you dated Dr. Jim. Did you Ted?”

That comment shut her up really quick.  I then asked if we could get lunch at ‘O’Malley’s’.  Ted agreed and mom was silent and just nodded her head while smoking a cigarette.

Once we at the restaurant, we were stated immediately and greeted by our server Mallory.  Mom ordered a Vodka Tonic with lime, Ted got a Bourbon, and when it came to me, I asked for a beer.

 My mom’s eyes lit up and said “absolutely not Sean Tobias.  Not here, do you want this place to lose its Liquor license.

I just said, “excuse us Mallory for a moment” and Mallory went away.

I then went reminded my mother that it is our family name on this restaurant and that, as I pointed to the photo of my deceased dad with brass plate below that has “Patrick Sean O’Malley.  Our Founder.” with dad’s birth and death year etched on it.

I also my mother of her own underaged drinking by saying “you, Aunt Maureen, and Aunt Margaret were going to dive bars in SoHo when you were minors with fake ID’s.  Might I add as well that every time a Ryan or an O’Malley member either marries or dies, you and Ted didn’t mind if I had a beer or two since I was thirteen.  All I am asking for is just one mom.  I’ve had a bitch of the past few days.”

My mom just stares in me in shock and then said, “Just one Sean Tobias.  I’ll be outside for a moment because I can’t fucking smoke in here anymore.”

Once Kathleen left Ted said to me “you should be easier on you mom Toby, she just worries about you, that all.”  I just replied back “yeah right Ted.  So can I get a fucking beer in the restaurant that has my family name on the outside, the business you now run, and maybe one day inherit or not?”

Ted then said to me, “if you get me fined by an undercover cop and loose my pouring license Toby, that money is coming out of college fund, now call Mallory over.”  

I smiled and called Mallory over and Ted asks for a beer chaser as well to go along with his Bourbon.

Once mom returned from her “break”, Ted was sipping on his Bourbon, and I was halfway done with the twelve ounce pour of very weak beer, but it didn’t matter to me.  She just said to me “just this one Sean Tobias.”

As we ordered our meals and I was on my second beer, “so I think today went well considering my diagnosis.  I’m good enough to go back to school and rejoin the team.”

Mom just dropped her fork and said “didn’t you hear what Doctors Pedersen and Rosenberg told you, you can’t play lacrosse Sean Tobias.  That was our deal.”

I just took a second sip of my beer, stared Kathleen in the face and said coldly “Dr. Jim and Dr. Rosenberg don’t know what I have.  You were in the room when they gave us the news, and I must add rather rudely dismissive of Dr. Jim as well.  He has been a family friend for years as well as my Godfather.

I got a bit louder and braver from the beer and said “Dr. Jim gave me the ok to participate in team practices and trips just not in the games until I am reevaluated in six months, and by then mother I will be eighteen and can make my own medical decisions. Ted tell her!!”

At that point Ted went from being a cool stepdad in that he risked the business to get me beer to say to the ultimate one by saying, “Toby’s right Kathleen.  He can participate with the team but just can’t play lacrosse.”

Mom got all huffy and said “my men.  I lost my appetite, get my food to go.  You boys have fun bonding.  I’ll catch a ride home.”

Once my mom stormed out Ted just said to me “fucking finally I can have a peaceful lunch in here.  You want another one Toby?”

I said, “sure Ted, and thanks.”

Ted and I talked for a bit while I had my third beer and he a second Bourbon while we ate our lunch.  I was feeling it and so was he.

I then just asked Ted bluntly “she doesn’t want me playing sports, why that Ted.”

Ted just replied “she loves you Toby in her own way, and doesn’t want anything to happen to you, that’s all.”

I then added my buddy Jake, you know the one that saved my life, drives a car to school.  We are the same age and actually I’m older than him by a few months, so while I have a driver’s license, how come I don’t have one.  You never offered me one.  I still walk to and back from school and have to either Uber or get rides from friends, why is that?  It’s not you or mom who cannot afford to get me one.  Both the house we live in, and your lake house are fully paid for by the businesses you run. ”

When I asked that question, I saw that Ted got a bit apprehensive in that he took the last sip of his drink said to me, “look Toby.  You and Kathleen were not the only ones hurt by Patrick’s passing.  

“I helped carry his casket to his gravesite as I did so I saw a young widow crying and a little boy asking where his daddy was in that he wanted to play ball with him again.  It wasn’t until some old ‘Mick’ came up to you and said something in Irish to you at first, and then in English ‘your Da in in that box boy and aint coming back ever.’

Ted went on to say as I tear up some, “when I saw how this old fossil of a man treated the son of my late business partner and friend, I got in his face and told him to fuck off.”    

“Not only was your dad a visionary but while I was more the business aspect of this restaurant chain, but he was a good friend as well.  Would do anything for anyone, a bit reckless at times but yeah, we were a good team.  Now I have to try to find additional business partners with Patrick’s vision and they are hard to come by these days.  

“Finish high school Toby, then college, and if you wish to be a part of your legacy that Patrick built up you can.  I have no one to pass this business on to but just investors that want to make a quick buck and sell everything Patrick and I built to some suit type in New York, London, or Tokyo but never in Shanghi.”

I listened to what Ted just said to me and said “one day Ted I hope to take over the business that you and dad built up but first I have to make sure that I’m up to it.”

Ted just added “word of advice Toby.  Limit your drink and never pick up smoking.”

I just stared at him and said “yessir.”

Once Ted and I got home, mom was on the porch, with her usual Vodka Tonic and a cigarette and on her cellphone and probably talking to Aunt Maureen.  She said, “finally they are here” and hangs up the call.

Yeah, she looked pissed at the both of us and as we walked by mom said to the both of us “where the hell have both of you been?”

Ted just replied “it was about time that Toby and I had a true stepfather to stepson moment.  We never really had one before today.”

I added in “it was finally good to know Ted as a person for once mom, we never really get to talk much, he even cancelled his conference calls so we could just hang out with one another, alone, for once.  We had good man-to-man chat.”

I mom, with her still pissed of look on her face said to me “ok, fine.  It was time you both finally bonded after having Ted as your stepfather for eleven years.  Now get inside the both of you.”

As I walked by her, I said, yeah just to get her goat “so mom am I an O’Malley or a Pedersen because I look a lot like Dr. Jim?  Dad was a Ginger with green eyes, while I have blond hair and blue eyes, just like Dr. Jim so maybe you and him did more than just ‘date’.”

I could see that I upset Kathleen enough in that she was at a loss for words, so just lit up yet another cigarette and took a sip of her usual Vodka Tonic and said to me “you had a lot to drink Sean Tobias today.  Be sober for school tomorrow.”

I just replied back, “yes mom, and it wouldn’t kill you if you laid off the smokes and drinks either” as I walked up the stairs to my room and took a nap.

Well, I attempted to, but I heard Kathleen and Ted fight, and boy was mom pissed off at the both of us.  

Even when I put on my noise canceling headphones and listening Finnish Hard Rock, I could still hear them both going at it.

I then took them off because I wanted to hear what Ted was saying to my mom as well, so I got up out of bed and stood by their bedroom door to eavesdrop on the whole “discussion” about me.
He shouted at her and said “if it wasn’t for me, you and Toby would probably be destitute and living with either friends, family members or on the street Kathleen.

“We both married one another out of convenience and that’s all because at the time I took pity on you and Toby but now as look at the spiteful and control freak that you have become over him, then I’m cheering for him.

 
“He has no one to be a proper father figure to him, I sure as fuck haven’t been one until now.
While you haven’t exactly been a great loving model as a motherly type for him either in that you will not let go and let Toby to be own man and the longer you cling on to him like is a child, he will resent you even more.  I know because I have seen his behavior change dramatically over the past few days.

“So while I am just his step-father and wished to adopt Toby as my own but you were dead against it, I highly recommend Kathleen that you change course when it comes to your son and soon or you are going to do some real emotional harm to the boy, that’s if watching his father drop dead and die right in front of him wasn’t enough.

“It's your choice Kathleen but I’m sure you need another fucking Vodka Tonic, cigarette, and a call to Maureen to decide what is the best for Toby.  She did have five children, three boys and two girls while you opted for a tubal ligation shortly after Toby was born and that broke Patrick’s heart when you had it done because he wanted to have a big Irish family, but he caved to your demand.

Then I just heard mom go off on Ted by yelling “how fucking dare you speak to me like that Ted, in my house!!  It’s bad enough my son is giving me shit for trying to be a good mother to him and now you are giving me lectures on how to be a good parent, so fuck the both of you!!

“Okay goddammit, I’ll sign what ever papers he fucking wants me to so that he can play that fucking game, but he stays on IR until he is given the medical clearance to do so but goddamn it Ted, if he does has HCM he gives it up and that’s final Ted!!

Ted then said in a soft yet firm voice “I know it’s hard to let go of Toby but you are making the right choice in this Kathleen.  He’ll be eighteen soon so legally he can make his own medical decisions then and there is not a goddamn thing you can do about it.”

My mom just shouted at him “get the fuck out Ted!”, for which he said “gladly, I’ll be sleeping in my office for the next few nights until you come to your senses woman!”

I saw their bedroom door open up and Ted said to me “you heard all that?”  I nodded yes.  He said good, I need a drink after that son, how about you?”  I nodded again and said “sure thing dad.”

Ted poured us two large and neat shots of his favorite and very expensive bourbon that costs $200 a bottle so he tells me and asks me how I like it.  I said it was smooth as I sipped on it.  We both sat in silence for a bit enjoying our stepdad to stepson moment in silence.  We hear my mom come down the stairs, open the front door and slam it loudly behind her.  Ted says “finally having a peaceful moment for the first time today.  I smiled back at him.

I then said “look Ted, thank you for all of that, what you said to mom.  I do appreciate you standing up for me.”  Ted just replied back, “it had to be said to her eventually Toby, and if it wasn’t today then it was bound to happen.  You are going off to college soon and she needs to be ready for that unless she plans to move into your dorm room and give you instructions on how to fuck a sorority babe.”

I was sipping on my bourbon when Ted said that and I nearly spat it out of my mouth because what Ted said was so funny and knowing Kathleen probably very true of her.

I stood up, and then did Ted.  We approached one another and gave each other a big hug and several pats on the back.  He said to me “I meant what I said earlier, while I haven’t been the most attentive stepfather to you.  I let Kathleen make those decisions about what was best for you, but I made the wrong call, so I am sorry about that, but I am here for you now so if there are specialists you need to see or tests to be done, I know of some great doctors.  I just said “thanks Ted” and we hugged again. 

As we were hugging, mom came into the office, and yet again reeked of a Vodka Tonic and cigarette smoke to say “Ted, no reason to sleep in here tonight, and as for you Sean Tobias O’Malley, who is as stubborn a County Kerry mule, I’ll sign whatever paperwork that needs my signature.  We’ll see about you going to a heart specialist soon.”

My eyes lit up and said “thanks mom, that means a lot to me. I’ll bring the paperwork from the school tomorrow after practice” as I gave her a hug and a kiss on the cheek.

She just replied back “my baby boy is now a man, it’s time I start to treat him like one, just be more goddamn more respectful of me Toby.”

I said “sure thing mom” as I finished my drink and got ready for bed.  I have an early day tomorrow.  As I raced up the stairs and into my room (and feeling the effects of the bourbon), I wanted to give Jake a call with the good news, but I said “shit, I don’t have his phone number”, but I’m sure I’ll see him in the gym before class.

Tomorrow could not get here soon enough. . .