The City of Rossford

“Are you really failing music theory?” Sean said. “I mean, it’s really not as hard as it sounds. All you had to do is show up. And we’re musicians for God’s sake.”

“Oh, my God,” Shelley sank lower in her seat in the van, “this is such a nightmare.”

“What’s a nightmare?” Sean said, beside her. “That your family cares about you? Or that after being in a family of musicians—”

“Jesus Christ—”

“Watch it, young lady,” said the old man beside Bryant who drove on in silence through the night.

“Excuse me Uncle Frank. Jiminy Cricket!”

“Silly, but better,” the old priest said.

“All I’m saying,” Shelley was saying, “is we’re not the effing Von Trappes.”

“We’re better than that,” Frank said. “We’re the Slaughters.”

“I’m so glad my last name is Babcock,” Sean reflected.

“I’m glad my name doesn’t have the word cock in it,” Shelley Latham said.

Chad North, on the far side of the car, snorted a laugh.

“And this is just the beginning. We’re not even in Erie yet,” Shelley told him.

Bryant turned to his uncle and said, as headlights zoomed by, “I get less and less excited to go back there every minute.”

“You can’t just not go back,” Sean told him.

“Actually you could,” Shelley said. “Aunt Anne never comes. She’s onto something.”

“And I’m not with my family,” Chad told him.

“Our family is your family,” Shelley said.

“No it isn’t,” Chad differed.

“He’s got a point,” Bryant reflected. “Our family is hardly even our family.”

“What I meant,” Shelley said, “is that us… we in this car, are your family.”

Chad gave her a small smile.

“Yes,” Sean, who sat between them, agreed. “Such as we are.”

“I thought Meredith and Mathan would be here,” Chay said.

“Nope,” Sheridan shook his head, putting the popcorn between them. “Are you disappointed?”

“You know I’m not,” Chay dug into the tub. “Do you remember when the dollar show used to have those bags instead of the buckets?”

“And we would save the bags,” Sheridan continued,

“cause popcorn cost so much. Take em home and keep them in your Dads’ fridge, and then come back to the movies—”

Chay was chuckling, “With pop stuffed in our coats, and Milk Duds. And you’d wait till the theatre was busy, and then bring out the old bags and ask for free refills.”

“Yeah,” Sheridan said, leaning back, wide legged and tossing popcorn in his mouth. “We can’t have been the only ones who did that.”

“I never met anyone else who did,” Chay said in the dark while the previews played overhead. “Whenever I tell that story, people look at me like I’m crazy.”

“So I guess it’s you who singlehandedly tipped the dollar show onto our scheme. It’s damn impossible to sneak in a tub of popcorn.”

“Oh, heck, the movie’s starting.”

“What is it Chay?”

“I can’t remember. Who cares, though? It’s a dollar, right?”

As the large scene opened up on a grey cityscape that was either New York or Chicago, Chay yawned and said, “I hope I can stay awake.”

“Yeah,” Sheridan murmured, trying to be mindful of the few people in the theatre. “I usually just watch stuff on DVD and then turn it off when I get tired and wait to see the rest tomorrow. It’s hard for me to do movies.”

Chay snorted.

“What?” Sheridan said.

“Why the hell are we here then?”

Sheridan cuffed him in the head.

“It’s our quality time. You’re supposed to be my best friend, and we haven’t hung out, you know, just the two of us, in a long time.”

Chay chuckled and leaned in close to Sheridan for a second, and then pulled away.

“What?” Sheridan said.

“I didn’t mean to crowd.”

“You don’t crowd me,” Sheridan said. He shoved his shoulder closer to Chay. “I’m not some homophobe. This is just like when we were kids.”

The next morning Layla closed her eyes tighter when she heard the knock at the front door and waited for someone else to get it. A few moments later the rapid approach of socked feet told her someone was about to knock at her own and then she grimaced when she heard Danasia tapping.

“Layla! Get up! Are you decent? Quit using that dildo, put a housecoat on and come out.”

Layla opened the door to her cousin and said, “Bitch?”

“It’s for you.”

When Layla entered her grandmother’s kitchen, she said, “Shit.”

“It’s good to see you too, Layla.”

“Will.”

He gave her a small bow, and his dark hair fell in his face.

“Happy Thanksgiving.”

“You came to wish me a happy Thanksgiving?” Layla Lawden said.

She turned to go to the counter and pour herself a cup of coffee. The kitchen was dark because it faced northwest.

“Yes, and other things.”

“Other things?”

“We haven’t talked in a long time.”

“Years in fact,” Layla said, pouring creamer into her cup.

“Surely not years.”

“Surely,” she said, mocking Will, “years.”

She frowned at the taste of the coffee and spooned in more sugar.

“Well, I don’t mean to be mean, William, but I still don’t get why you’re here.”

“Sheridan told me I should come by.”

“Sheridan?”

“And Bren.”

Layla looked at him and grimaced, and then she tried the coffee.

“Now, that’s better. Let’s sit down,” she said to Will.

He nodded and she sat down across from him.

“I just got up, Will. It’s Thanksgiving. I’m getting married in three days, and I haven’t seen you in about two years. So when you show up, I have to know what the hell is going on.”

Will looked at her.

“They said I should see you,” he began. Then he added. “And I agree. I mean, I should see you. I wanted to see you.”

He was quiet a moment, and then he added. “Before you get married. We needed to see each other.”

Layla nodded.

“Ghost of boyfriend’s past? Is Aidan coming too?”

“Look, Layla…”

“Yes.”

“I wanted to see you. A lot. I wanted to get a good look at you. As an unmarried woman.”

Layla threw back her head and laughed.

“Damn, you know what, Will? You are just as strange as you always were.”

When Will said nothing, Layla said, “Well, how do I look? Was the looking worth it?”

“It actually was,” Will said. “I…” he stood up.

“Where are you going?” Layla said.

“I just thought I’d better get going.”

“Well, you better get staying,” she said. “Because now you’re here.”

She yawned and pointed to the coffee pot. “Get yourself a cup of coffee and sit down with me.”

As Will got up she added, “I wish I had a cigarette.”

“Since when do you smoke?”

“Since never. But on a morning like this with a cup of coffee, I think, it sure does look fun.”

Will shook his head.

“I gotta disagree.”

“You don’t have to, but it’s natural that you would.”

“That I would not smoke?”

“No, that you would not agree with me.”

Will chuckled and stirred his coffee.

“Layla, do you remember why we didn’t work out?”

“Because you said you’d pick your school over me, and put us on the back burner.”

“Ouch. I’m sure I didn’t say it quite like that.”

“I’m sure you did. And then I’m sure I left you. Say,” Layla said, “you’ve already told me that Sheridan and Bren are all up in my business—”

“Actually, what I said was—”

“So what I want to know,” Layla continued, “is are they all talking behind my back? They all think I shouldn’t be with Kevin? They’d all think it would have been okay if I’d ended up with Aidan? But really, they want me to be with you? Don’t they?”

“Oh, Lay, I think that’s paranoid. Who is THEY?”

Layla sat back and listed off of her fingertips, “Dena, Milo, Brendan—obviously—, Claire. My brother. All those nosey bitches.”

“Look, Layla,” Will said. “I don’t know what… all of those nosey bitches had to say. All I know is that I really, really wanted to see you. And I wouldn’t have unless Brendan told me I had to see you one last time.”

Layla was about to say something sarcastic. But suddenly she realized she didn’t want to. She wasn’t feeling sarcastic. She wanted to say something to him about his hair, about his eyes, about how she’d forgotten certain parts of him, and other parts looked better than ever before. She wanted to wrestle with the hurt that came up at the same time the softness did. And then the phone rang.

“You’d better get that,” Will said.

Layla got up and answered.

“Hello? Yes. Yes.” She looked over at Will.

“I can come in an hour. You’re coming to dinner, right? Alright… Alright. See you then. I love you too. Bye now.”

Layla let the phone drop into its cradle and said, “That was the mistake our friends don’t want me to make. That was Kevin.”

When Sheridan and Chay reached the hospital room, Mathan and Meredith were standing outside. Chay stuck his head in. Mr. And Mrs. Netteson were sitting on either side of Robin who was turned away from the door, her face hidden in the pillow.

“She’s been like that since we got here,” Mathan said in a low voice. “She won’t see anyone.”

“We should tell her Chay’s here,” Meredith suggested.

“I don’t understand,” said Chay.

“I think she’ll make an exception for you. She always does.”

“I wish we had been there. I wish she hadn’t gone out,” Chay began.

Meredith went into the room and touched Mrs. Netteson’s shoulder. She said a few words to her, nodded, and came back out.

“Chay, she agrees with me.”

Chay looked at Sheridan and he said, touching him lightly on the cheek, “Nothing’s gonna happen to you. I wouldn’t let anything happen to you. Go on in there.”

Chay nodded and went in while Mathan said, “What would happen to him in there? And how would you stop it?”

Sheridan just looked after Chay and Mr. Netteson moved to let Chay sit down.

“Robin?”

The girl turned around. She wasn’t stellar. She wasn’t ugly. She looked, when not bruised, like any other girl. Now, having been beaten she looked like several other girls.

“Can you all go away?” she said to her parents.

“Well, honey, we don’t want to leave you,” her mother said. But Mr. Netteson said, “Sure. We’ll get you signed out so you can go home.”

“I don’t want to go home today. I don’t think I can look at all of them.”

“All of them won’t be there,” her mother said. “This will be a very small Thanksgiving.”

“Good,” Robin put on a smile. “I have very small thanks.”

Her parents left the room and Robin said to Chay, “You know what I think about God?”

He said, “Un unh.”

“He’s a real motherfucker.”

It would have been funny, but Robin Netteson didn’t laughter. It was a simple observation.

“When you were a kid, before Noah and James got you, what did they do to you? Those other people? Do you remember your parents?”

“I don’t remember my father,” Chay said. “Not my first father. I do remember my mom. She sold me to a junkie.”

“I had heard that,” Robin said slowly. “I never asked. I never really believed it.”

“Well…” Chay said, “it’s true. I have to be honest. The guy never did anything to me. Well, I mean, not what he wanted. I kicked him in his nuts. He beat the hell out of me. I tried to call the police. He tied me to a chair before I could call them. I was like that for a long time. Shit on myself and everything. It’s like a dream. It’s like something that happened to someone else. That’s why when the police got to me they made sure I never saw my mother again.”

“Did you miss that?” Robin said softly. “Did you miss her?”

“Hell no!” Chay said loudly, and then covered his mouth and grinned. Robin grinned as well. Her first grin.

“See, that’s what I mean. God is a motherfucker.”

“Oh, I don’t know about that,” Chay said. “I think people are the motherfuckers. If not for God I wouldn’t be here right now. That’s what I think. No offense.”

“Then why didn’t he help me?” Robin said. “And it’s no good saying he let me live. That’s… that’s some low level bullshit. I… Chay, can I ask you a question?”

“About God?”

“No,” Robin said. “I’m through with his ass. About Sheridan?”

Chay felt something in him tighten, but he said, “Ahhh…. Alright?”

“Do you love him?”

“I did,” Chay said. “I mean, I do. Of course. But… not like I did. I can’t want someone I can’t have.”

“See,” Robin said. “I used to think he was your boyfriend. Especially when you told us you were gay. Do you think that’s why your parents adopted you? They saw it in you?”

“They saw a lot in me. They saw themselves. Yeah. That’s probably it. I told Noah so much stuff he must have known. He must have seen himself in me.”

“You all look alike. That makes sense. But… I used to think Sheridan was too. I used to think he was your guy. He acts like it.”

“Yes,” Chay said slowly. “He does that.”

“How can you stand it?” Robin said, suddenly. “He touches you sometimes. Not… inappropriate. But just… he gets too close. Everybody says it. And then he goes off and fucks all these random girls. How can you take that?” she was speaking in a low voice, each sentence one rapid string after the other.

“Sometimes I can’t,” Chay said.

Robin nodded.

“I just wanted to know. There’s so much I want to know these days, Chay. You see?”

“I see,” Chay said.

“I want to talk to him.”

“Sheridan?”

“Yeah.”

“About me?”

“No,” Robin said, a small, tired smile on her face. “Me.”

Chay got up. He kissed her and she said, “I love you Chay.”

“I love you too,” he told her, and left the room. Her parents were about to come back in, but Chay said, “She has to say something to Sheridan.”

Sheridan blinked. He took off his ballcap and put his hands through his light colored hair, and then he nodded.

Beside the bed he looked up and said, “What’s going on?”

“Close the curtain,” she said. “We have to be really quiet for this.”

Sheridan frowned, but he nodded, stood up and, with an apologetic shrug, he closed the curtains hiding the two of them.

“I… Those guys did some horrible stuff to me.”

“Yes they did,” Sheridan said by way of validation.

“I was a virgin, Sheridan,” she said, urgently.

“I know. And one day, you don’t understand this, but one day you’ll meet a nice guy and you’ll have the experience you want and—”

“That’s bullshit,” she said. “I don’t want to meet the right guy or a nice guy. I was out there that night because I wanted a bad guy and an interesting guy. I wanted something fun. I didn’t expect what happened to happen, but I wanted something to happen. You know? I was feeling…. Real. For the first time. I was feeling dangerous. I was actually… a little horny before it happened. I think if someone had ASKED I would have wanted… something to happen.”

Sheridan kept nodding. He didn’t know where she was going with this, and finally he told her so.

“You…” Robin said, at last, “you’ve been with a lot of girls. Haven’t you?”

“I guess…”

“You know,” Robin said with some force.

“Okay,” Sheridan nodded. “Then yeah. What’s up, Robin?”

Her hooked finger beckoned to him. He knelt closer. She whispered:

“When I get back home… when I’m healed up, Sheridan…”

“Um hum?”

“I want you to fuck me.”