Hedevils

ONCE UPON A TIME THERE WERE 3 GAY GUYS one black, Asian, white an they work regular administrative jobs in the FBI building knowing they can solve the cases just as good but the director is fickle.....so a rich private investigator Micheal (who never shows his face) finds out bout the three boys an recruits them to be THE HEDEVILS!

Its the morning of October 20th, 2019 in Arlington, VA just outside Washington. And Jason LaCrosse is getting ready for another work day at the FBI. 

Jason always wanted to fight ever since growing up, his dad was a cop an his grandparents was in the military so a career in national defense was destined for him! He went thru FBI boot camp an showed impressive skills with weapons, graduating at the top of the class.....but there was also something about Jason that made him stand out, HES GAY! Jason never told many people during training that he was gay cause he didn't want to be ridiculed. It was back in 2006 an "don't ask don't tell" was still in effect, but Jason held his own and kicked ass just as better any straight guy! Jason was also a hopeless romantic, he been looking Mister right it seems like forever! He joined a dating app called "GuysMeetGuy" hoping his cute looks would find him a wonderful, mature,  understanding man.....

"Oooop I got a notification, I wonder who this is"

But to Jason's disgust, it was a middle aged crusty dude in his 50s talkin bout he likes twinks.....AN HE WASNT EVEN CUTE!

"An old ass man ewwww! (sigh) been on this dating service for 3 months an got nothing but old men an guys that look like serial killers! I hate my life...but then again Kaleem an Lee cant get a man either so, I feel a little better!" Said Jason to himself as got his bag and left out to work 

Meanwhile not far on the other side of town, was Jason best friend.....Kaleem Hawkins! 

They met in boot camp kinda on accident and Kaleem was cool with Jason because, HE WAS GAY TOO! Kaleem came from a rough area of Norfolk, Virginia called "Riverside Gardens", but he was different from most kids, he was into tech and software and even made his own computers an shit, impressing the hell out his teachers! When Kaleem couldn't get into college he instead used those skills in the FBI training camp (where he met Jason) and he was on his way to Silicon Valley but.....his mom Lucille (along with many others in their neighborhood) strangely caught this aggressive form of asbestos an he decided to stay back east, get a job with Jason at the FBI an be his moms caretaker. 

"Ok mama im off to another boring day at work! You sure you gon be fine here all by yourself?" Kaleem asked 

"Oh baby (cough) dont worry bout me I'll be fine, an by the way thank you for lettin me stay in yo house, you really didn't have to," Lucille Said 

"Mom how did you get asbestos anyway, it's like a coincidence other folks in the complex have it too," 

Honey I had no idea, I turned on my AC unit which I asked them to fix a million damn times an I started coughing for a week, an it was so bad I went to the doctor but he never seen asbestos so aggressive, he gave me all these damn pills," Said Lucile 

"Look you're stayin here with me okay! Listen I got a fridge full of food, TV unlimited cable and my laptop so knock yourself out!"

"You must be awfully lonesome in here, havin this big place to yoself, when you gon bring home a man?" Lucille asked gettin all in Kaleem business 

"Mom! (chuckles) thats kinda personal..." Kaleem Said 

"I just thought I ask, you know I'm alright wit you being gay an everything it's not like I'll run him off...is that why you aint found nobody?" 

"Its Kinda complicated, but look I gotta go! Bye mama!"  Said Kaleem as he kisses his mom on the cheek, then goes out the door 

Meanwhile at the silver spring metro station, there was Lee Yang Jamison, Jason's an Kaleem other friend! 

Lee was sitting by himself during lunch break at the FBI building when Kaleem an Jason sat near him and overhead him talkin bout this cute guy he saw.....and as fellow gay men they joined the convo and realized that had so much in common! And they been close friends with Lee ever since!

Lee was slightly older but he was FINE asf and he actually had some combat experience being that he was in army briefly. He wanted to be an agent but there was one big insecurity he had.....he couldn't drive! It was something he didn't tell the other boys, so he took train to work. While on the train he saw a cute guy he was talkin to at work.....Kendrick, who he wanted to go out with an Lee was kinda nervous but he approached him an sat next to him.

"Hey Kendrick...."

"Hey, dont you work in the office on the 4th floor? Lee right?" Kendrick asked 

"Yeah thats me! Me an my 2 other friends got security experience and we can kick ass but those assholes in management ugh, they dont believe in us, they say the big job is "too tough" for us so we crunch numbers an file paystubs everyday! Like they think cause we're gay we cant shoot a gun or cant do dirty work fuck outta here wit that!" Said Lee 

"Man thats fucked up! They always treat us gays like shit! Like its almost 2020 you think they be more liberal an not so archaic!" Said Kendrick

"Listen Kendrick, um, (chuckles) I dont know how to say this but i'm like totally crushing on you and I was wondering if you would like to..I dont know get some Starbucks!" Lee said nervously 

"No offense but, I'm not into Asian guys, I MEAN YOU COOL AN ALL BUT..." Kendrick Said 

"Yeah I know, its just a "preference"....Lee said as he was offended 

Lee was so upset, he coulda mopped the floor with his racist ass, but he decided to walk away instead.....the train arrived at capitol hill an as Lee got off the train, in the midst of the crowd, a guy in all black hat, coat an shades, was watching him. 

"Did you get all that Micheal....." the man said as he made a call 

"Yes I did Gordon, now go inside an see what his friends are like, if they have crime fighting experience like they said then they'll be perfect for the job..

"Yes sir!" Gordon said he went inside the FBI building

Its debate night, and there are two candidates for president, O'Chelle Mobama wife of New York senator Jharell Mobama, who was at one point a Vice President for Bill Clifton! He along with O'Chelle a political strategist, had a prestige an were big players in congress for the Liberation Party, so running for President as the first black woman elected wasn't a hard sell! But her opponent on the other hand, was famous billionaire Ronald Frump.....Frump was a crass, blunt, hedge fund manager from Philly an he was once friends with the Cliftons but when Frump saw the direction the liberation party was going, he didn't like it an decided to go on the conservative side an run as candidate for the Old American Values party (or also known as the Bulldogs since their party's symbol was a bulldog) 

The presenters, Megan Felly an Shucker Talson reporters from Wolf News, goes to their stations, and the debate begins

"GOOD EVENING AMERICA, WE ARE LIVE FROM MIAMI, FLORIDA FOR THE MOST ANTICIPATED DEBATE OF THE CENTURY! LIBERATION PARTY NOMINEE O'CHELLE MOBAMA AND AMERICAN VALUES NOMINEE RONALD FRUMP!" Said Megyn 

"We start off the debate with Mobama, miss Mobama, what are your views on President Romney an the US involvement in the South African civil war?" Asked Shucker 

In my honest opinion, I believe we have no business getting involved in such a conflict, South Africa is in turmoil, an we welcome the poor refugees like the innocent men, women an children that need asylum,and pursue their dreams of education an economic stability without worrying about a bomb dropping in the night! But do I think America has no right to intervene ABSOLUTELY AN AS YOUR PRESIDENT I WILL GET OUR TROOPS OUT OF THERE!" Said O'Chelle as The crowd cheers

Okay mister Frump, what is your view on the South African crisis?" Asked Megyn 

Its a disaster, its really really sad what they are doing there! At first I was kinda apprehensive bout sending troops to Africa cause I been over there an I gotta tell ya those soldiers are some really tough guys! But what miss Mobama fails to mention is that they're funded by CHINA, the Chinese actually meddle in the South African governments ear an tell them to DELIBERATELY, attack the US bases these are really bad guys! An if i'm your president, we're goin to BOMB THE HELL OUT OF THAT MILITIA!" Said Frump as the crowd claps 

"Miss Mobama, since we're on the topic of refugees we now come to this touchy subject....there are 20 million undocumented migrants in America today, many cities are saying our immigration system is terribly broken, and the refugees coming aren't really helping, what are your plans to solve this?" Shucker asked 

"Immigration is what makes this nation great, after all mister Frumps wife is an immigrant! People from all nations coming to share their cultures an talents and they do the dirty work we domestics overlook with pride! The process for the right to be an American is out of range of many migrants an explains the illegal immigration issue! But as your president, I promise to make immigration better, less process more results, abolish ICE, grant people asylum if they need it an make the migrants who are already here citizens!" Said O'Chelle as the crowd cheers

"Mister Frump what is your plan?" Asked Megyn 

"Get, them, the hell, OUT!! GET THEM ALL OUT, the Mexicans, the Haitians, the Central Americans all of them leeches to our society bringing crime an rape to our cities, so we're gonna get them out don't worry. And to all the corporations stop hiring these sons of bitches THATS LIKE THE ONLY REASON WHY MIGRANTS COME HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE, THESE COMPANIES COMPLAIN ABOUT LACK OF LABOR, they just want cheap workers! An the LIBERATION party, feed them this image of all of us in unity an the American dream but immigrants are like ants to our American picnic, AN IT NEEDS TO END!" Said Frump as the crowd cheers, but O'chelle gives Frump a serious side eye for his comments

The debate was over and people mingle with each other in the reception hall, Ochelle is at the bar getting much needed cocktail when her hubby Jharell meets up with her 

"Hey madam president! (kisses O'chelle)"

"Oh hey, I think I did good up there! Dont you?"

"You kiddin you did great!"

"Can you believe the mess Frump is saying ugh, I really question America's intelligence sometimes! Said OCHELLE 

"Thats why you need to win this! There's a little black girl out there counting on you, America is counting on you! You made it this far now we just wait till November an hope for the best" days Jharell 

"I guess you're right...let's go back to the hotel I'm like so tired"

But then Frump and his wife Maria Sharapova, walk over to the Mobamas, Maria was like a trophy wife, an deep down only wanted Frump for his money but he was too naive to see it! For the cameras she was his arm piece but.....she had something else up her satin sleeve!

"That was a rather great debate!" Said Frump 

"Oh save it! What were you thinking saying those things about immigrants!" OCHELLE said 

"Just speaking the truth, you liberators just pander an cater to the minorities just to get votes."

"Oh like how you bulldogs pander to upper middle class whites an anybody with a blank check..." Said Jharell 

"(Chuckling) Ah senator Mobama, oh how I wish you had that same energy when it comes to lawmaking! But I didnt come here to play tit for tat, I just want to say job well done an hopefully the voters will agree in the polls." Said Frump 

"Ronald, when are we going home? I have a manicure appointment at 8:30!" Said Maria 

"You must be Maria, I heard a lot about you, some good an some I shouldn't mention in front of your husband." Said OCHELLE 

"Thank you my dear! You know, if you're going to be madam president...may I suggest a stylist! America needs a good looking leader not a potato in a skirt...and Nine West pumps!" Maria Said as she threw shade 

"An might I suggest gettin that blueberry that's right there between your teeth!" Said OCHELLE 

"THERES A BLUEBERRY BETWEEN MY TEETH!!"  shouted Maria grabs a spoon an runs out the room

"(Chuckling) good night Mister Frump!" Said OCHELLE 

"This isn't over, enjoy the spotlight while you can, but I watch my constituents if I were you," Said Frump as he walks away

"You handled that with class baby!" Said Jharell 

"The same way I'll handle the Oval Office!" 

The Mobamas soon left in their Escalade, but in the limo was Frump.....an two strange men who have a shocking surprise for OCHELLE!

Kaleem, Lee and Jason decided after a long week they go out on the town, they went to the gayborhood walking down the street goin to the hottest new bar, and then Lee told them bout his racial encounter, 

"We goin to this new bar called Trade an I heard this bar is like super litt!" Said kaleem 

"An the bartenders are meals!," Jason Said 

"Yeah that's nice..." Said Lee all Said 

"Lee what's wrong with you boo?" Kaleem asked 

"You know Kendrick from the other department?" 

"Oooh you mean his fine ass! He thick like a marshmallow!" Jason says 

"An he smells so fuckin good!" Says kaleem 

"Well y'all can have him! I sat next to him on the metro an I asked him out...an he told me straight to my face he don't like Asians!" Said an upset Lee

"HIS BITCH ASS!" Jason shouted 

"He basically just said what the white gays on Grindr an Tinder say everyday, but when they say it to your face it's like....damn that's what you think about me huh! Man fuck preference that's just flat out racist!" Said kaleem 

"See Jason you have an advantage in this world, you don't get strange looks, profiled, an you what LOGO calls the perfect gay guy!" Lee Said 

"I feel so bad tho, like I'm ashamed to be white sometimes! The fact it's almost 2020 an there's so much racism with gay guys got me fucked up!" 

"Don't beat yourself up Jason! We know you ain't down with that shit!" Said Kaleem

"Plus we stick together!" Said Lee 

The boys pass by a parked car, but inside the car was Gordon, who was still keeping tabs on these men..The boys come to the club, an Kaleem tried to get in line but a guy an his group of his white butch friends cuts in front of him!

"Um excuse me, I was here first!" Kaleem stated

"MAN SHUT THE FUCK UP! Why don't you go to the black club across the street we don't want you here!" One of the guys Said

"HEY LEAVE HIM ALONE! " Jason shouted

"Is there a problem here?" Lee asked

"(chuckles) YOU HANGIN A WIT A CHINK AND A MONKEY, AINT THIS SOME SHIT!" One of the guys mocked

"FUCK YOU!! YO BOY TOY PROBABLY BLACK!" Jason Shouted

"NAH I AINT INTO MONKEYS!" the Guy said being racist

"BOY YOU GOT ONE MORE TIME TO CALL ME THAT!!" Kaleem shouted as he got in this guys face

"WHAT ARE YOU GONNA DO BOUT IT!"

Then Kaleem punches the guy in his face, and was about to brawl but suddenly 4 more guys come and its was like a gang!

"You gon wish you hadn't done that.." the guy said as he got up

The gang tries to fight Kaleem, Lee an Jason! One of the men tries to punch Lee but Lee blocks his punch and kicks him in the crotch then punches him to the ground leaving him injured! Kaleem pushes the bully down an beat him repeatedly, got in that racist ass! Two guys try to beat up Jason but Jason throws an object an knocks the man out! But One of the men has a GUN and tries to reach for it but Lee comes from behind an snatches it!

"DONT MAKE ME SHOOT!!" Lee shouted as the gang, all beaten up, finally run away!

"Are you guys okay?" Jason as they were regaining their breath from fighting

"Yeah just a lil shaken up, can you believe the shit he said! Callin me a monkey an shit like...IM SO MAD WHATS THE FUCKIN ISSUE WE ALL GAY AN WERE ALL HUMAN!" Kaleem shouted as he got emotional 

"Since when did gay guys form gangs?" Lee asked

"But the way you snatched his gun tho!" Jason said 

"YASSS! Okaaay Jackie Chan!" Kaleem said 

"The fuck! THIS GUN IS FAKE!" Lee said as he tampered with it

"Wowww you serious! Well we kicked they asses either way!" said  Kaleem 

"Right! An were bottoms..." Jason shouted

"Well we fight dirty, so technically were messy bottoms!" said Lee

All the boys laughing then go inside the club, but in the black car Gordon watches them an phones Michael..

"I just watched them fight this gang, they have skills." Gordon said 

"Oh really, hmm maybe they are exactly what we need! Keep a tab on them Gordon." said Michael

"Yes sir! (Hangs up phone)"

IN FRUMP TOWER MANHATTAN THE NEXT MORNING...The elevator opens to the top floor an Frump walks through the hallway to his office, He goes inside an closes the door, then he picks up his newspaper)

 "New polls are showing that miss Mobama is using her minority magic an gains in the polls.... a load of bullshit from this phony news!" said Frump lookin at the paper

Then Two Ukrainian men in suits, Vladimir an Boris, come out the elevator an the receptionist sees them,

"Hi um, can I help you?"

"Yes, we here for mister Frump" said Boris

"Yes its important business, we want to negotiate a contract to build some property in southern Ukraine." said Vladimir

"Ok let me get him on the line hold on..."

(Frump is at his desk when his phone rings)

"Yes Angie what is it?"

"You have two contractors, Vladimir and Boris, from Ukraine, they want to discuss some business with you." she said

"Yes send them in!"

Then Vladimir an Boris come into Frump's office...and they locked the door!

"Ah I see you got some....dirty information on my opponent." said Frump

"Yes, we did lots of research on many of miss Mobamas background, she's not who I think the American people would want leading the nation.." said Boris

"Tell me what you know." said Frump as he gives $5000 in cash in exchange for the information

"Miss O'chelle gave $200,000 to senator Eleanor Simpson to help her get elected in both her terms. And miss O'CHELLE also supports giving some American weapons to South African rebel's to fight the terrorism!" said Vladimir

"Interesting, and all the politicians knew it was dangerous but they went along with it!" said Frump

"Our agents also discovered, that her husband Jharell, who is also a senator, voted to close down all the border detention camps, an give immigrants a 5 day process, to be an automatic citizen!" Boris said

"The American people can't handle another Liberator, seriously this is why I need to be president!" said Frump as he banged his fist on the table

An if you do become president, there's also a little bit of a loophole for your business, since you are the commander in chief, you have access to the treasury, which means you can use those resources to build new properties such as Florida or California, never have to pay it back!" said Vladimir

"(Chuckling) I like the sound of that, but I need to become president, I can't lose to this communist broad.... there has to be a way" 

Actually there is, according to American law, if anything tragic were to happen unexpectedly to your opponent, such as a plane crash, an abduction, a shot to the chest..All of which can be arranged. Then you automatically become the president!" said Boris

"You know I can't be connected to this in any way, the phony media are like bed bugs...."

"Oh trust us mister Frump, (Chuckling) you'll wont even draw attention, so you keep campaigning acting like you care, while me an my associates will get rid of the trash." 

"Our virtual agents have found out where Miss Mobama is going, a private retreat for democratic women senators in Rehoboth Beach, Delaware.....she leaves tomorrow afternoon!" said Vladimir

"We can fool the media and get her out the way! If she wants to put up a fight....that's her choice." said Boris

"And they said Ukrainians an Americans hate each other...(Laughing)" 

The just like that, Frump shakes Boris and Vladimir's hands in agreement and they got in a big black Cadillac, and drove to O'chelles adress, she was bout to have a vacation from hell!!

At THE CIA OFFICE ADMINISTRATIVE SECTION.....Kaleem is at his desk, he an the other boys had dreams of being FBI agents but whatever reason the head of the organization didn't believe  in 3 skinny lil guys....compared to the brawny (and straight) agents, so the boys were put in the administrative section, in the wonderful world of government mail sorting and faxing! Kaleem was in the mailroom when Sheela, a coworker and his friend, goes over to him.

"You got mail, you got mail (Chuckling) hey baby how you doin!" Sheela said

"Ugh  I hate this job, always crunching numbers, it's like these people here never take me or Jason or Lee serious!" Said Kaleem

"They just hatin on y'all! Besides y'all got black belts an can whoop any homophobic ass I seen ya do it!"

"Even other gay guys, me an the guys were on our way to this club or whatever when these group of big masculine white gay guys try to beat us up! Callin me a monkey all that shit!" said Kaleem

“So gay guys forming gangs now? What's next Bloods an Crips gon wear crop tops! Sheela Laughed”

"But we kicked they ass! One try to even tried to pull out a gun but Lee was like the fucking matrix just kicked the gun out the guys hand! Oh my gosh I still can't belive that happened!"

“Chile...all y'all need is some breasts an some blonde wigs an y'all be Charlie's Angels! But I wanted to know if you heard the news..”

“Why what's the matter....."

"They knockin down a lot of apartments near our old neighborhood back in Richmond, including Southeast Gardens!"

“That's my old house! And that's where my mom an aunts still live! FUCK THIS!!

“Guess who behind it tho..read it!”

(Reading the phone) the city of Richmond is building a new mixed income neighborhood in the old dilapidated area, with Mayor Bob Webster along with the housing authority and representatives Tim Cott and John McBain....what the fuck! An they won't even fix the air condition but they sure as hell will knock  down? Kaleem said

“You know they even claimed that because of the pollutants in the air, a lot of people gotten sick! Hey didn't your mama say she got some type of infection like a month ago? Sheela asked

"Oh my gosh yess that's why she's living with me, an Frump just endorsed Tim Cott like a month ago knowing damn well his fertilizer company he sponsors is spewing that shit in the air.... I need to tell the director this, this is fuckin crazy!" Kaleem shouted

“Look here boo, I know you mad an everything but unless you in the inner circle the director aint gon listen to you! I say you look into this yourself....you got yo .45 in the car!" Sheela said

"This is just too much, I need a frap! I'll be right back.." Said Kaleem as he storms out the office

Meanwhile on the road, Ochelle, came over to Hillary's townhouse in her convertible ready to pick her up for the girls trip.....

"HEYYYY GIRL!!!" Hillary shouted

'YOU READY TO HIT THE ROAD!' Ochelle asked

Yes I am! 5 days of no work, no politics and no Bill! I Even brought the toys!" said Hillary as she got in the car

"No you didn't!"

"Yes I did!"

The girls then drove off on the 3 hour trip through the backroads of Maryland, O'chelle then stopped at this gas station halfway there an talked with the owner was a hardcore liberator! 

"I'm voting for you! This country needs you" he said

"Aww thank you, you are exactly what America embodies, hard working small business owners making an honest living!" said Ochelle

"CMON OCHELLE LETS GO BEFORE IT GETS TOO DARK!" hillary shouted

"Im sorry.....Here's the moon pies you wanted, Hillary fat ass Clifton!" 

"Why thank you O'chelle bitch Mobama!"

"Hillary, I don't know if I can do this..." Ochelle revealed

"What are you talking about, you're an amazing woman you were destined to win!"

"But this is such a big job!"

"Look! You need to win this shit! Look at your opponent, Ronald Frump the obnoxious pig in a Hugo boss suit, sitting up there in his 5th Avenue penthouse acting like he understands the struggles Americans face! You really want THAT for America!" Hillary protested

"I suppose you're right, but he's doing better in the polls I thought America was better than this!" said Ochelle

"Blame those fear mongering bulldogs they have people convinced that America is this hell hole which was all our fault! (Sigh) But honey, this trip is our chance to get away from all that, don't worry  you'll be fine!" said Hillary

An they continued on their journey, but soon a black Cadillac turned onto the same road an followed them....it was Boris an Vladimir.

"There they are. Go slow, we don't want to attract attention." said Boris

"You got the guns?" Vladimir asked

"As the Americans say, I'm locked an loaded!" said Boris as he loaded up his weapons

Ochelle an Hillary finally arrived at the beachouse, where two liberator senators Nancy Piloni an Eliza Warren greeted them, they planned on a fun weekend but.....it was about to go south real quick!

"Hello hello, Ochelle dear its so wonderful to see you!" said Eliza

"Yess im so glad to be away from the political world an some fun times with my girls!"

"You're goin to love the house, its beautiful an we have champagne chilling a waiting for you girls, you need a drink dealing with that brash ignorant fool, but don't you worry bout the polls the super donors kicking the anti-Frump ads into high gear! said Nancy

"It really is a fight an a test of our party's will, but I dont want to think about that I wanna have some fun!" Ochelle said

Then another car pulled up, it was Sheila Johnson Lee....

"Oh my gosh! Its Shelia Jackson Lee, hey sweetie!" Greeted Nancy

Hey gurl how you doin, oooh honey I had to woo sah for a minute I was bout to kick somebody ass, did you know what that lil cuban sandwich wit eyeballs Marco Rubio said to me!

"What he say?"

"He said that O'chelle is using race like a crutch, and that she only goes to black an hispanic neighborhoods for votes, acting like the those white men didnt try to run her out of town when she was in Daytona!" said Sheila

Soon another car pulls up, its senators Maxine Walters and Karen Harris...

"Oh my gosh! Its Maxine an Karen my Cali girls!" shouted Nancy as she hugged them

"Hello ladies!" said Maxine

"Ugh its so beautiful here! When Eliza called me on the phone an told me about this retreat I packed my bag with the quickness!" said Karen

The women went inside and sat on the couch drinking champagne, while Shelia was gossiping...

"Chile this man from the east wing tried to get fresh wit me, talkin bout he gon help get my bill passed an buy me a Bloody Mary! I was like boo boo....I just had a Bloody Mary earlier it's called a PERIOD, OKAY! I don't want no more blood I just want me lemonade an some vodka!" She said

"Honey I hadn't had a period in 45 years!" Nancy said 

"You also never had a man in 45 years..." said Maxine as she sips her drink

"Ooooh Maxine no you didn't!"

"Oh yes I did!"

"You know, I met this guy, real cute, but when it came to Sex, he had no idea what he was doing down there!" said Karen

"Just like a bulldog down at the border!" said Sheila 

(All the ladies are laughing)

"Okay ladies, we got a special lunch tray over it the kitchen made by Wolfgang Puck! An then Miss Beyonce is gonna perform for us in the living room later on!" said Eliza

Meanwhile down the street, Boris an Vladimir park near the house, waiting to strike...

"So how are we going to ambush them?" Boris asked

"We're blow them all away!" Vladimir said he loaded his gun

"I was thinking we be more...discreet about it"

Boris points to a pizza delivery guy coming through, and Vladimir had a evil plan, but soon they got a call from a mysterious woman.....Lady Red

(Phone ringing)

"Privet moda Madam krasnaya, we have arrived at the beach house, ready to fulfill our duties," said Vladimir

"Ha haaaa, da oshen khorosho, I got the address for the secret lair I sent to your GPS," she said

"And how is it going on your end?' Boris asked

"He doesnt suspect a thing, he's a real tupitsa, but not to worry darling, he's too entrenched about the White House.....he inst watching his own house, (laughter) eto budet veselo, teper prodozhalay!" she said as she hung up

Meanwhile in the house, Nancy got all the women together to make a toast, but Maxine sneaks off into the kitchen...

"I would just like to say thank you to miss Eliza Warren for putting together this excellent retreat for us, the leading women of the Liberation Party! We are so hopeful that our friend miss Mobama will capture the heart of the American people and be the first woman president (Chuckle) No offense Hillary! Let's toast to O'chelle Mobama....our next president of the United States!" said Nancy as they toasted

"OKAY GIRLS BEFORE BEYONCE COMES I WANT US ALL TO TALE A GROUP PICTURE!" said Eliza

"Wait y'all, where Maxine at? MAXINE! CMON ON BACK HERE WE BOUT TO TAKE A PICTURE!"

But in the kitchen Maxine opens the back door an let's in some fine ass male strippers!

"Oooh I can't wait to see the girls faces! Follow me boys..."

Maxine comes back into the living room with a bottle of olive oil, and some desert....

"There you are Max! What are you doing with that bottle of olive oil?"

"Well I figured, our husbands aren't here an it's just us girls, so we gon have some fun...HIT THE MUSIC

THEN THE MEN STARTED DANCING AN GRINDING, AND SUDDENLY TOOK OFF THOSE SHIRTS SHOWING THEIR CHOCOLATE BODIES, IT HAD THE WOMEN SPEAKING IN TONGUES..

"DEAR JESUS HOLY GHOST! AND I THOUGHT HOUSTON HAD BIG ROCKETS!!" Shelia shouted

Then Hillary got herself a lap dance with "mister caramel" giving her a RUSH! Shocking Ochelle

"Hillary!!!!"

"WHAT? If Bill did it why can I?"

"The president gets to rub oil first!" said Maxine

"I am so not doing this!! I can't!" 

"Well if you won't then honey I gladly will!" said Nancy as she rubbed down "mista vanilla" an his bubble booty. But somebody was at the door...

"You ready?" said Boris

"Gotov....." said Vladimir

"Ooooh lemme tap that ass one more time! Baby If you ever in Houston...call me!" Shelia said

(The doorbell rings again)

"Hold on I think I hear someone at the door?" said Eliza

"Hello you have a pizza delivery for O'chelle Mobama!" said Boris

Oh I didn't know O'chelle ordered pizza?

"Yes it's baked fresh, wanna look an see if you got your order right.."

THEN SUDDENLY TEAR GAS CAME OUT THE BOX AN VLADIMIR THREW IT! THEN BORIS AN VLADIMIR PULLED OUT THEIR GUNS! HILLARY TRIED TO CALL THE POLICE BUT THE GAS BEGAN TO PERMEATE THE ROOM AN EVERYBODY PASSED OUT.....INCLUDING OCHELLE! THEY TIED HER UP, TAPED HER MOUTH, AN THREW HER INTO THE TRUNK!

"Did you dismantle all the cameras?" asked Vladimir

"Yes I did, now the federal agents have their work cut out for them.." said Boris AS THEY DROVE OFF!

Ochelle was now being held hostage! There was no telling what would happen to her, but little did she know 3 skilled men would save her!