Chapter 1 of the fiction I’ve been writing.
1st chapter might be slow, and its my first time writing something like this.
18+ readers only please.
Do not read if gay themes offend you.
Morning of 27th July 2015 – it’s the peak of winter in Australia.
I awaken to the alarming sound of my tacky watch. My train leaves in 15 minutes. Fuck. Yet again I have no time for breakfast.
Inflicted with a nasty case of 2nd year syndrome, I grudgingly drag myself out of bed to face the first day of 2nd semester.
As with my normal morning routine I have time for a quick shower where I almost always end up contemplating my entire life.
Will it ever end? Nope
Do I have what it takes when it does? Nope
Am I ready to face the real world? I don’t know.
I find myself trapped between the safe & stressful world of study and the impending doom awaiting me after graduation.
I reluctantly drive myself to the train station in my 2000 Holden Commodore boganwagon… Realizing the train leaves in 1 minute I clumsily jog to the platform with my insanely heavy backpack weighing me down, barely catching the train in time.
I start listening to some music to relax myself and stare out the rain wet window of the train. Approaching the next platform, the train slows to a halt. My attention is captured by a bright red flicker against the pale-grey, mid-winter sky out the window. It is a man, around 6 feet tall rushing past to catch the train, jogging in sync with the bounce of his dark grey backpack. With his back facing me my eyes are drawn down to his crisp white and velvet red shoes. White anklets flashing as his charcoal slimfit jeans lift above ankle height with each stride. His legs are seamlessly contoured by the jeans – exposing a subtly cute bubble butt. My heart skips a beat as flush of desire intoxicates my body. I force my mind back into realism before I give myself the chance to imagine him in nothing but tighty whities. I take note of his torso; the red I initially noticed was his bright-red nylon vest covering his grey casual winter hoodie.
As he boards the train via the closest door I see him entirely for the first time.
Instant attraction – light brown hair with a slightly messy angular fringe style cut. Brown eyes, cute button nose, clean shaven with a slim, yet marginally muscular build. Looks to be early 20s – possibly a peer, also studying.
Time seems to slow down whilst I continue to gaze helplessly into his perfection, I am totally mesmerized by his good looks. My drugged and drained mind has lost track of time. His eyes lock with mine as he approaches me. Fuck. I’ve been staring for WAY too long. Continuing past me to the seats behind, I notice a faintly awkward smile. I’m stunned, completely frozen, wondering if he thought I was some pervert or deluded idiot. I must have been staring for at least 20 seconds.
“This train terminates at the City station”. The PA system announcement breaks me out of my panicked state. My cheeks are a shade brighter than the guy’s winter vest as I speed out of the station and toward my first class.
In attempt to distract myself and to partially wake me up, I decide to grab a coffee on the way to class. I figure a regular latte will be enough to wake me up and prepare me for the day.
I arrive at my first Monday class some 20 minutes later, dreading having to sit through a 3 hour practical. The demonstrator announces it will be a partnered practical – asking us to pair up.
Partner work….. great! I don’t have any friends in this class and they are asking us to pair up. I hate asking people to pair with me. I always make a fool of myself. Not the best start to the semester.
I helplessly do a once over glance of the room to find someone who looks as lonely as me… Everyone is already paired up and chatting like they are besties. Cool. I’ll just be over here.
In the corner of my vision I notice a familiar flash of red through the glass walls of the laboratory.
Books under one arm and carrying a grey backpack in the other hand, he clumsily bursts through the glass door with an excessive amount of force.
The guy in the red vest.
“Sorry for my lateness”
“No problem, find a partner for the first task” replies the demonstrator.
He looks straight to me – the only one in the class standing alone.
Approaching me I begin to panic – my mind is in a million places:
What do I say? Fuck all these people with partners. Damn, he is hot. That latte was bad.
What is he thinking? Does he think I’m a stalker? Why did I pick a class with no friends?
“Hey you were on this morning’s BEL train right?” Breaks the silence
“Uuuh yuuuh” I reply, trying to say yup and yeh at the same time.
Disconcerted by my panic and misspoken response I quickly blurt out exactly what was on my mind: “and you were the guy I stared at for too long”
I’ve finally done it, I’ve made myself look like a total and complete idiot.
“Yeh you really looked out of it” he replied, laughing slightly.
Maybe he thought I was tired and just staring into space?
“Yup a late night and shitty morning will do that to me”
“That’s what I have this for” he said, lifting up his take-away cup.
I recognise the label – its my favourite café! A good 30 minute walk from Uni.
“Steam Beans – that explains why you were late”
“Yeah I needed to grab a bite and caffeine boost” he replied, smiling.
“What’s your name by the way? I’m Billy”
“Tom, nice to meet you” I reply, passing a slight smile
A brief awkward silence follows as he awkwardly nods his head and smiles.
“Shall we find a work station and get this shit done as soon as possible?”
“Sounds good to me” he replied.
It takes me a few moments to realise he didn’t ask to partner with me. Ah well. I kind of asked him.
As we make our way to the workbench I begin to relax and forget about my awkward staring.
The following 2 hours consisted of us chatting to each other about our interests, coursework and how shit being a 2nd year student really is.
We discovered that we shared a lot in common – in a completely non-cliché way.
He lives in the same suburb, is enrolled in 3 of my classes for the semester and plays Aussie rules football, just as I do.
Anyway, to cut a long story short we completed the practical in good time and departed with a casual ‘see you next Monday’.
My mood was much optimistic after leaving that morning. I got through the day with a (mostly) positive attitude, which was welcome refreshment in comparison to last semester.
I board one of the many evening trains at 6:15pm to be home by around 7. Routinely I take time on the trip home to reflect on the day and explore what might come tomorrow. At this point of the year I am easily stressed… this morning on the train, I probably made a big deal out of nothing. It’s easy for me to lose context of a situation, especially in the morning, when I’m tired and strained by conflicting emotions; stress and fear combined with lust, impulsivity and excitement. I need to relax.
Pouring with rain, I dash from the platform back to my car to drive a 5 minute trip home. I notice the navy blue of my roommates Lancer light up as lightning strikes nearby. That means my roommates, Jessie and Steve are already home (hopefully cooking) 1…2…3… I begin counting the seconds until the thunder reaches my ears. CRACK. Followed by a loud rolling rumble. 4 seconds, I quickly calculate that’s around 1 and a half kilometres away.
As I open the door I am welcomed by the distinctive smell of chicken soup.
“Hi guys im back!” I call out
“Helloooo” I hear Jess call back followed by a loud sound of metal on metal “Damn”.
Holding back my laughter I ask “Steve here too?”
“Yeh he is out back taking photos, some storm isn’t it?”
“It sure is!”
Steve and Jessie are a couple of 4 years and have been my close friends since freshman year of High School. They love having me as a third wheel and token gay friend even if it makes me feel uncomfortable at times. I walk into the kitchen to find Jess working frantically preparing what appears to be a risotto. Jess is a great all-round cook but her risotto is by far her best dish, worthy of a nice restaurant in the Eastern districts. She also knows how to budget food, along with utilities and rent for 3 people and still make it taste amazing.
I lay in bed struggling to sleep my mind begins to drift as it does every night. My slight healthy obsession gets me thinking about my previous relationships. I’ve only been involved with 2 guys before, during senior year in High School I had Elliot – that ended because I had to move 2 hours drive away to the City for Uni study and he wanted to start his own business locally with a friend.
Tom during first year Uni was great, he was cheerful, incredibly bright and had pretty sizable package. Unfortunately we shared very little in common (excluding the same name)… it was more of a fun fling than anything serious.
I’ve been craving attention for a while now, but I don’t have time to put the effort in. It’s difficult for members of the gay community to flirt and find someone. You can offend people easily and there is only so much a gaydar can do. Not to mention the low % of people who actually might be interested. With only around 2% of the male population in Australia identifying as homosexual, looking for a date is a full time task. Trans people have it much worse though… there is a lot of negative stigma, and not enough people willing to just love. I count my blessings – guys are great, its 2015 and I’m lucky to be gay.
I awaken the next day buzzing with energy. I must have slept early last night. Maybe dreaming about Billy allowed me to sleep extra well. Maybe I was hit by lightning and I’m on cloud nine? Nah.
With a full hour to prepare for the day, I might enjoy a long, warm and soothing shower.
I step into the shower and pull the door closed. I close my eyes and feel the warm water trickle over my naked body. I bring myself back to the dream I was having the night before. Billy, fully naked, pushing himself up against my rock hard cock as I grind my hips up against his lightly toned body. His hand reaches down to rub the full length of my meat.
I feel the excitement building in me and begin to stroke my 7 inch shaft slowly to the thought of Billy bouncing his bubble butt on my rod. I picture him flawless; 6 foot with lush brown hair, neat pubes, 7inch cock with tight nips I can play with.
The thought of pounding my stiff member into him makes me so horny I speed up and in a matter a seconds I’m cumming. Long gushes of hot white liquid shoot out and land on the shower wall opposite. I slump back against the shower tiles and breathe heavily. The warm water keeps me relaxed. It’s lucky that I have my own shower attached to my room… I wouldn’t want to shower where Steve and Jessie have sex… that would be totally weird.
Far out, I’ve known this guy for 2 hours and I’m already fantasizing about him?
That’s a little creepy. Eh. Lucky it’s just in my mind and not written down anywhere… ;)
Who hasn’t had an immature crush?
Needing to recoup my energy and prepare for the day to come, I prepare a generous breakfast of weetbix, oats and a banana. I am not enthused, it’s only Tuesday. Why can’t it just be Monday?
In preparation to leave I pack my lunch and footy gear as I have mandatory evening practice at 5. Our team is top of the table at 10-1 with only 11 rounds to go. Our finals spot is basically already locked in but I don’t want to be the guy who brings the team down in our dominant period.
At 6 foot 2, strong and quick, I play in the full back position – the key defensive role in an 18 man team. On paper, my job is to shut down the opposition’s full forward (key offensive). But I almost always end up floating between 2 or 3 players and coordinate our defensive structure on-field.
Half expecting to catch up with Billy at the next stop, I drive myself to the station and board the same train I caught on Monday. The train pulls up to the station. No Billy. I am slightly disappointed.
Maybe he is on a later train.