"Blake, I really don't think we should be doing this..." is what I tried to say, but my mouth wouldn't let me. Blake wouldn't have heard me anyways, the music from two doors down was too loud. It was the graduation party for Blake's undergraduate acting class, and I was his date. A party made up of drunk, young actors; the music could only get louder. The beat pounded in my ears and the alcohol pounded in Blake's head. I could see it in his eyes, an energy within that made them seem to glow in the dark. Blake roamed the hallway looking for the nearest, unlocked door. I continually looked back, fearing the mob of people just down the hall. Then as I imagined someone running after us Blake pulled me into the public washroom, the only room unlocked. Probably because its the only room without a lock...
My nose sours at the familiar smell of old toilets and terrible soap. I look around and see the porcelain urinals and decrepit stalls, the broken mirror and missing sink. As my eye's wander I see that Blake's eyes are locked on me. Without missing a heartbeat Blake steps forward and kisses me, breaking my reprieve. I try to step back, to escape but my mind melts. My thoughts are thrown out of my head as he pushes me up against the wall and I can go back no further. His lips burn against mine and I taste the alcohol on his breath. Slowly I get hooked on him, his breath goes in and then out of my lungs and I can't breath without it. It's like a fire making my heart race and my blood pump hot in my veins. He's forceful, but gentle at the same time, how does that work? Then Blake pulls back and looks me in the eye. His hair slightly curved at the top falling on his face. Seeing me confused and flustered, he chuckles. I can't help but grab him and pull him in for another kiss. Then I turn around and force him up against the wall. With my hips I pin him there. With my arms I hold him close. With my teeth I nibble his ear.
"So, what happens if someone walks in?" I whisper, my breath in his ear. Blake pushes back against me and before I know what has happened, we are lying on the ground. One of his hands is under my shirt, the other unbuttoning my pants.
"We let them see a show. It's free admission." And by the end of his sentence my shirt is off. I slowly take off his, not wasting any second I get to examine him. His abs, perfectly sculpted, tense under my touch. His smooth skin, already beginning to shine with a thin layer of sweat. His eyes focus again on mine, an intense hunger within them, and an impatience that matches the growing tent in my pants. I rip off what was left of his clothes, and he jumps at the chance to take off mine. We wrestle with the fabric, his hands all over me just I am all over him. My body burns wherever he touches like a disease transmitted by touch. It crawls along my skin without resistance, marking me as his, and I savor every second of it. We stand to remove the final barriers of cloth and I stop to stare. How could I not? I look him up and down, then my eyes stop in the middle. There he is, all of him, just for me.
Blake is looking at my face, but I can't meet his eye's. He walks up to me, so close that I can feel the heat coming off of him, I look further down at the ground. Embarrassment has me firm in it's grip, staining my cheeks red. But it's not nearly as strong as Blake's grip on my chin. He lifts up my head and kisses me. His tongue begging for passage into my mouth breaks all of my will to resist and I am his again. I taste his tongue and can feel his passion. He pulls back and slowly his mouth advances down. His hand stroking my dick in preparation for what is to come. I couldn't stop him if I tried, the pleasure clouded my mind. Blake's slow advance was torture. As he played with me I could only watch. He kissed my neck and moved down to my nipple. He teased it with his tongue and I thought I would die. Never has he made me feel so good. He stroked my cock faster and continued his slow decent. It was incredible, but would he ever get down there? The anticipation had me squirming under his touch.
Then he kissed the head. I nearly came from the sudden sensation that enveloped me. The moisture and warmth of his mouth suddenly there. Slowly he went up and down and my hips were drawn in to follow. He massaged my dick with his tongue, touching all the most sensitive spots one by one. He serviced the head first, slowly and carefully licking and kissing it, playing with it in his mouth. Then the at base of the head he did something that had me thrusting into his mouth before I could figure out what he did. I could hear the slap of my balls on his chin as I went deeper and deeper down his throat. He was incredible and I was in ecstasy. Then as he felt me tense up before I came, he stopped. I moaned, but it sounded more like whining. I played with his hair, hoping he would continue and bring me to my peak. But he came up to eye level and kissed me, pre-cum still on his lips. His eyes were wild and animalistic. He knew what he wanted and he would take it, take me.
"Your not getting out of this that easy." Blake said, taunting me with that seductive tone of voice only I have heard. He kissed me again, his hands sliding down my back. My fingers were still locked in his hair, messing it up to match his eyes. Then he grabbed my ass and squeezed. The slight pain was exciting and new. I could see that Blake liked it too. His fingers stretched further and further into the crack. Slowly he was opening up my ass and before I knew it he had me up against the counter rimming my hole with his tongue. My heart kept beating faster with its motion. It felt so powerful, like he was altering me to suit his needs. It sent shivers down my spine. Both the sensation of his tongue in my ass and the idea of this unstoppable part of him. He was focused on one thing only, the sex and how to make it better. That has plenty of advantages... but was just making it scarier. It's like there are two Blake's; the one who loves me and the one who loves sex.
"Blake, stop. I'm not ready to go all the way yet." I spoke out between the moans and the labored breathing. Blake pulled out his tongue, and just as I was about to stand and face him, he stuck in his finger. He pushed down on my back and increased his exploration of my ass. I felt the pain and pleasure swirl in my mind like bright reds and blues flashing in front of my eyes. His finger prodded me inside and it was incredible. Then he stuck in another finger. More pain shot through me like a zap of electricity. I couldn't retreat, Blake still had me pinned, and the pain was becoming worse than the pleasure. He massaged my ass inside and out with an almost feverish intent on it.
"Blake, please stop it. It hurts!" I almost yelled, but he still didn't stop. My heart raced and I looked up in the broken mirror. Blake's eyes were staring back at me. He could see the pain on my face, and I could see the ecstasy on his, burning bright with the power of alcohol. Then he stuck in a third finger. I cried out. Tears began to stream down my face and the world blurred out of focus. But Blake was still looking at me with those eyes that I love, that face that I adore, that hair that I affectionately pet when we're alone. His fingers still explored me, mapping out a territory for him. There was a tickle in the base of my abdomen and all of a sudden it hit me. A wave of feeling that made me shake. It was like having cum ten times, without actually doing anything. I moaned and it echoed in the bathroom, but to my ears they were the sound of screams coming from the walls.
"There it is..." Blake whispered right in my ear, his breath warm against my cheek as he slowly removed his fingers. "I will make you feel amazing tonight, Jason. You know that your just being shy, when we're done, you'll be begging for more." I couldn't look up at the mirror, I was afraid to see what his face would look like. I know that he was looking down at mine, trying to catch my eyes, I could feel it. I tensed up, knowing where he was and what he was doing, anticipating the pain to reappear. I waited and waited on the counter. Fear trapped me there along with Blake's hand, wondering when I would feel his dick shoved up my ass. I waited, but still nothing. His hand crawled up my back, around my shoulder. His abs came up flat on my back. I waited, anticipating the pain. His legs bumped up against mine, and his cock poked my back.
Then Blake's fingers caressed my face and I flinched. A tear landed on my back, and it felt cold. I looked up at the mirror and he was crying. He stroked my hair and I winced. The wounded look on his face would have broken my heart any other day, maybe it still did. He tried to talk, but no words came out. He got off me and gently, as if carrying something fragile, helped me up off the counter. Setting me down and grabbing his stuff he walked out of the door, leaving me sitting there. Stunned and naked on the floor with music blaring down the hall. Alone and broken hearted at the loss of a person I knew so well.
I often dream of that night, but not always the same dream. Sometimes I wake up and think Blake will be there with me. Other times I wake up in a cold sweat with phantom pains in my ass... No matter how it happened though, I can always acknowledge that Blake was an idiot. I wasn't even given time to think, let alone talk to him. He was gone before my mind could comprehend what had happened. Out the door and out of my life without so much as a goodbye. What do you call that? One Night Stand, two years in the making. To Love or not to Love. Rape and Run. The Eye of the Boyfriend? I don't know, and I will never know. I was so confused, there is still one thing about that night that I can't differentiate between dream and reality. After Blake walked out the door, I thought I heard him say "I will always love you, I'm sorry..."