Irish Point of view

I look around the room and take it all in. It's clean, the clutter, dirty cloths, and dust are gone. The trash bags and the trash for that matter are all gone. This is a different blanket to. I hear the slight sounds of snoring and wincing; I look down and see Aiden laying on my chest, from under the blanket I see dark black bruises all along his back and the muscles of his shoulders and upper arms look angry, sore, and slightly bruised. I don't remember anything after we made love, how long had it been. I glance at the clock 1:02pm. I groan deeply and then feel Aiden's shifting weight. He sits up with a grimace of pain on his face, as he turns around I can see that his whole back is black blue and the crimson color of dried blood. He stands up and limps to the window, opens it and begins to take a much needed piss. I focus on trying to move my body and get up; every time I move I can feel the effects of the withdrawal on my body: fatigue, pain, raw. But I know I've made it through the worst one, the rest would still be bad, but not this bad, and most importantly they wouldn't take this big of a toll on Aiden. Aiden, I had to help him. I struggle to sit up and sit on the edge of my bed only to feel him sit next to me and I give in, I'm not strong enough yet to help him, but I will, I will make this up to him.

"Stop it." I look over into his eyes, "I can see you beating yourself up about this, but it's ok." Looking into his face all I can remember is hearing -Please don't go-. I lean over into him and before I knew it we were asleep again. The rest of the day passes like this sleep, wake, piss, me throwing up, us eating crackers he brought, and me wondering is there anything he didn't bring. The next time I can coherently look at the clock its 11:37pm and Aiden is sending a text.

"Your dad?"

"No that one was to Naomi, letting her know we were ok. She was about to call the cops over here cause I hadn't texted her all day.

"Wait, what?"

Aiden proceeded to tell me how he sped to her shop and how she helped him pack this bag and get ready to voyage to this side of town, he explained everything that had happened up till now and the lies he had formed to cover his absence from school, home, and popularity; mostly with the help of his friend Craig. Man what a hell of a 36 hours. We talked a little longer and explained that my brothers worked a 4 day on 3 day off schedule and rarely made the trip back during the week unless the Ocean wasn't accommodating to them which was hardly ever. Since having my brothers gone meant Da being stuck at home with me he often spent that part of the week or the majority of it shacked up with one of his wenches when he wasn't at work or at the bar. He might come home to pass out or beat me or eat and then leave, but besides that I was alone from Sunday night / Monday morning till Thursday afternoon.

We just laid there and looked at each other, not believing we had made it through last night, not believing we were both still alive or mostly that I was still alive. The days passed. Da came home twice Tuesday and once Wednesday, but after banging on my door repeatedly Tuesday the first time he came home he must have figured I wasn't home and left us alone. The rest of Monday was spent with me either sleep or continuing the withdrawals. I was still feeling the effects Tuesday but I was strong enough to use the bathroom and shower as was Aiden. The warm water felt so good and I found myself just sitting in the chair he placed in the shower with me. I don't know how but while I showered he found the strength to not only change my bed and wipe the blood off the wall, but make us some sandwiches. I tended his wounds Tuesday when I felt the steadiest after he had his shower; his body was a wreck, but his back. My god it looked like an animal attacked him, bruised and caked with dried blood from his skin being peeled off after hitting the wall repeatedly. We made quite the unsightly pair.

By Wednesday I had moved on to the puking phase, the tremors were fast hitting and short lived but I spent the majority of the day in the bathroom or out the window while Da was home for a few minutes. The day was mostly spent with Aiden sleeping though. I had slipped a xanax from my stash of pills into his soda that I got from the fridge while he was in the bathroom. He needed to sleep, he had probably slept all of 7 maybe 8 hours since Monday morning and was well beyond the point of burning yourself at both ends. I swear he was going to rub the wood off my desk if he cleaned it one more time, and has progressed to cleaning up the kitchen and living room in my house to boot. While he slept I puked and curled up with him on the bed, then puked and got up to move around slowly so as to shake off the stiffness, then puked some more and repeat. I was glad when I finally gave in to exhaustion and joined him in sleep with my arm draped over his waist and my chest pressed against his back: the big spoon position I believe.

He woke up Thursday morning to me wrapped around him looking down at him. I had actually slept about 6 hours straight before I had to puke again and had then laid there and watched him for what I suspected couldn't have been more than 30 minutes.

"What the hell time of day is it? I feel like I fell into a coma."

"It's 7am Thursday morning. -chuckle- I hope you slept well, you needed the sleep so I just helped you take it."

"Huh?" He said groggily.

"You needed help sleeping and I was worried about you so I helped you sleep."

The wheels began to turn in his mind as he registered what I had said, and watching the look on his face morph in slow motion was something I hope I never to have to see again.

"You drugged me?!"

I realized a second to late that I shouldn't have told him or maybe told him in a more graceful way, but let's be honest it would be a while before I was back to having in semblance of cleverness. "I'm sorry." His anger was so thick you could touch it, and I couldn't meet his eyes. I scooted away from him on the bed and I felt like I might puke again as my mind went from 0 to 60 in about a second. -That was a stupid thing to do, you idiot Irish now he's gonna leave and never come back, why would he, this is too much to go through when you're the only reward.-

The warmth was incredible. A kiss that set my soul ablaze with happiness. "Shhh. I know why you did it, and it's ok. Just don't do it again. -Chuckle- But I do feel a lot better and my body doesn't feel like I'm turning into a rock anymore." I make a contented sound and slide down into his arms, then I drift off to sleep in the arms of the boy I love more than I've ever loved anyone before.

We wake up, first me, groaning as I move then him jumping up with a fright thinking something is wrong with me. When he realizes I'm ok he just smiles and gives me a gentle kiss. I breathe out a sigh and thank God that I made it. The next few days will still be rough, but I can handle it as long as I have him by my side.



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