Pushi plumbing - Coffee and puked chocolates.

See the beauty of life in the hardest conditions with the story of eight happy beggars in my blog: www.luces-delatierra.blogspot.com.es in Spanish or www.lightsoftheearth.blogspot.com.es in English.

The ringing of the phone startled me when I was happily in one of my usual pig masturbations. My name is Patrick Duckling, 28 years old. I am gay and a real pig. I often wank at home stark naked and sniffing my own dirty body. I don’t have showers more often than once a month or less. I take my clothes off at home and spend hours jerking off as I sniff my feet or pits, and I bring an empty glass and piss in there and drink my pee from time to time. I like shitting on the floor and smell my own shit and I often taste it. And when I am on the edge of orgasm, I even puke a little and eat something more of my own digestion. That day I had shat but not puked yet when the phone rang. I have a plumbing company called Pushi and I was my own boss and the only employee. When people asked me about the name, I lied and told them Pushi was a Japanese heroine and they asked no further questions. Now one Mr. Wayne Roberts was calling. He said that his toilet was clogged. I had unclogged toilets many times. I enjoyed touching and smelling some other guy’s shit so I hope I could see some shit. But this Mr. Roberts could be married. It would not be right to have a hard on when I got to his house if his wife was there. He could also be somebody I didn’t fancy at all. All the time I was talking on the phone I was picking my nose. I like the smell of my nose too and somehow wanted to turn his masculine voice into smell. He told me his address and I had to go to his house two hours later. I still had some time to enjoy my masturbation. Customers did not mind I stank. They only wanted a skilful worker who took their problems away. I had more than one hour ahead yet. I had had a tiring morning and after lunch I like having at least two hours’ masturbation before I return to work. I puked a little. Now I enjoyed more the smell my dining-room was getting, though my smell of sweat was all over the house. Finally after an hour and a half jacking off, I needed to cum. I only needed to raise my arms and sniff a bit my ripe armpits. I came enjoying the orgasm as every day and continued jacking off awhile for I knew what pleasure my cock got by wanking after I have shot my load and cumming a second time. I would leave my cum on the floor in order to see it again when I come back. I put my clothes back on and left, but I still had some time to have a coffee in a bar, which I did have hoping Mr. Roberts was at least a kind man. I arrived to his address very early cause he lived very close. I was talking to him on the intercom and he told me he lived on the first floor, with only one flat. When I went up the stairs I could notice a strong smell of sweat. It aroused me. It was a man’s smell. “But don’t get aroused too soon”, I thought. Somebody may have been here recently. The smell was stronger when I reached the first floor. I rang the bell. Soon Mr. Roberts opened the door.

I was received then by the cutest and dirtiest of men. He smiled and soon I saw he had a big erection. He had nothing on but his shorts and his t-shirt. He was barefoot, and his feet stank, though it was hard to perceive any smell, the stench of shit being so heavy filling the entire house. For a moment I thought it was like entering a sewer. Later I could see his toe nails were black. He had blonde, short, curly hair. It was dirty too. Stains of sweat filled his face. He had a white t-shirt with sweat stains all over, but something more. It seemed as if this gentleman liked wiping his fingers in the t-shirt when eating and I could even smell food on it, mostly cheese. And some stains reminded me of snot, as if he wiped his nose there after blowing it instead as on a handkerchief. But I think I even saw a rot black booger there. His shorts had huge dark yellow stains as if he only changed his shorts once a month.

-Pushi plumbing? –He asked.

-Pushi plumbing is only me, Patrick Duckling.

-Wayne Roberts here. You can call me Wayne. What does Pushi mean?

-It is a Japanese heroine –I said as usual-. I hope I have all necessary things here. I have more things in my van on the street. What’s the matter?

-My toilet has been clogged for a week. I didn’t know how to unclog it. I sometimes had to shit. It was inevitable, though many times I entered a bar to shit. But suddenly I needed to take a dump in the morning hours and I am afraid the toilet is full of shit –I loved listening to his shitting routines.

-I am used to shit –I hoped all my words had a double meaning then. This gentleman was the man I most wanted to hook up. Never before had I had such an erection or seen such a dirty man. I didn’t care I had a boner. He had a hard on too. But I hope I am not disillusioned later. He could talk to me about his wife next.

-Will you please come to the bathroom? This house is very small and the bathroom is on the right as you must have noticed by the stench.

Hardly had I walked a few steps when I saw the bathroom, on the right, where the smell of shit came from. My eyes also saw that there was a very dirty bathtub, clearly unused. But it was a show to see his toilet. It was absolutely overstuffed with shit, all he had shat this week. Any other man could not stand that stench, but I loved it and even felt like touching it and eating it. There was a bucket inside the bathtub and I asked him to approach it so I could first remove the shit and fill the bucket with it. I started to take his stinking shit into the bucket with my own hands.

-Do you not use gloves? –He asked. He did not seem disgusted.

-I prefer not to use them. It is impossible later to take shit stains off a glove. It is easier with your own hands. Finally you wash your hands and that’s all.

-Do you not feel disgust?

-I have touched shit a lot of times. Something common in my job. I don’t mind.

-I should have removed the shit before.

“You certainly should” I thought “It’s strange. Any other customer would have. Why didn’t you?” But I was glad he hadn’t.

Suddenly he asked.

-Is it not too hot?

-It is.

And then he took off his t-shirt. Now he was only in shorts. My God. That was dirt. His sweat had shaped dirty streets all over his chest. There was something more and it was clearly rotten snot. “Do you blow your nose in your chest?” I wondered. Then I noticed for the first time he smelled of something else. I perceived a clear smell of garbage. His dirty shorts kept his huge erection. How I wish you took off the only thing you are wearing now. I thought it was too hot for me too and I also took my shirt off. Maybe it was just my imagination, but I think I saw him looking at my naked chest and even his cock went harder. I continued touching his shit; it was wonderful to be allowed to touch what your stomach has produced for a week. Then he suddenly asked.

-Would you like a beer?

-Yes, thank you.

He was absent then for some minutes. I awaited this man who turned me on so much, but in three minutes he was back. He handed me the bottle of beer. I did it on purpose. My hands were already very dirty with shit. I grasped the bottle neck with my shitted hands wanting to stain it with shit so I could taste his shit later. I also wanted to try to hook up this sexy man, and I had to show him how I really was. I took the bottle and I started to drink, of course with some shit in the neck. The taste of this guy’s shit was delicious. I did not want to leave his sewer, I mean his house. I drank and drank with the mixed tastes of beer and shit. I had to ask him.

-Do you have no girlfriend?

-No, I live on my own. I used to have a boyfriend once, but well he fell in love with another guy and left me. One question, don’t you really feel any disgust?

He was gay and he must have noticed I was having some shit of his with every sip of beer!

-I don’t feel any disgust, but sometimes customers do. Once I was working for a cute guy –I had to inform him- and he also watched me picking his shit. He suddenly puked. But he was so close to me that he puked on my t-shirt.

-What did you do?

-Nothing. I did not want him to feel uncomfortable and asked him to leave the bathroom. I did not change my t-shirt or take it off. I went home with this guy’s puke on my t-shirt. When I got home, I couldn’t help it and had to jack off smelling his puke. It is still in my wardrobe. I never washed it and sometimes I jack off with it.

-Good, it’s nice to know you don’t mind that which is not important.

I had finished removing his shit. I continued drinking the shitted beer, sometimes staining the bottle neck with more shit. He said he was gonna take the bucket to the dining-room. “Why are you doing that?” I thought. It was easy what I had to do next. The toilet was clogged with some toilet paper. I pulled it and pretended to do more things later but I was sure his toilet would work again when I flushed. In fact, I could perfectly flush. Now it was faultless. I feared to leave this house and say goodbye to this sexy dirty man. Now we would talk about the price, I thought. I went to the washbasin to wash my hand. He told me there was a soap dish close to the tap which I could use. The soap dish was as dirty as everything in his house, clearly stained. But I didn’t use it. I would wash them but nothing else. I wanted the smell of his shit to still be in my hands when I got home. Time had come. Could I tell him something like “you’re hot, man. I would do anything you wanted to please you.” But suddenly he asked me.

-Would you like a coffee now, Patrick? Can I call you Patrick? Of course you can call me Wayne.

-I love coffee, Wayne –coffee was the same to me. I couldn’t believe this sexy man was inviting me to a coffee. I did not have to leave yet and I could think things twice so as to check if I could after all have some sex with him.

-I think I have a box of chocolates somewhere. Do you like chocolates?

-I love them.

-So come to the dining room, please and wait for me.

There was a big couch in there and a small armchair on the right close to the bucket of shit. Of course I sat where I could smell his shit better. But he also told me.

-You can say of course not now. But I am usually totally nude at home when I am alone and I would like to be naked when we are having coffee and chocolates. So would you mind if I took off my shorts?

-Make yourself at home –I said, eager to see his complete nudity. His cock was not so big, but I don’t care about size. Then when he was walking to the kitchen I could see his ass. It was a hot ass and oh how I would desire to fuck it.

So I sat down close to the bucket of shit and awaited his return. I would like to take my clothes off too, but I preferred waiting to see what could happen now. I was not at home and he could feel upset. But suddenly I perceived a sound I knew very well and always aroused me. This guy was puking somewhere. I felt like going to the kitchen to see and enjoy, but also because I was worried about him, for he could be choking. The sound soon ended. He came first to bring both coffees and I could see again his hot cock moving freely despite the erection. He turned to the kitchen and soon approached the box of chocolates. I could not believe it. He had puked on the box. Vomits covered half of the box. I would be sitting smelling his shit in the bucket, his puke on the chocolates and his sweated naked body.

-I have nothing more to accompany the coffee. I couldn’t help but puke and I thought I would bring the box nevertheless. There are many chocolates with no puke on them. You can choose them and eat them.

He put the puked box of chocolates on the table. I loved the smell of his puke. I drank a bit of my coffee and then I chose one of the chocolates with puke on them, in fact one of the most puked ones. I picked it up with no disgust and ate it, celebrating the taste.

-A perfect combination of tastes, thank you.

He smiled and picked a new puked chocolate and ate it looking at me with no disgust.

-We can have our coffees now and our chocolates, puke or not. I like that you are not disgusted at anything, Patrick. By the way, I also want to know if you have a boyfriend.

-I have never had one. I have never fallen in love. Meanwhile I don’t need one. I want to enjoy sex.

-You could have the man you liked. You are very attractive.

-Thanks, Wayne. So are you.

I liked our conversation now.

-Well, I am a garbage collector and I must soon go to work. I don’t work on Tuesdays but a coworker has a temperature and has asked me to make his shift today. I have to start at five and I will return at nine. I wonder, would you like to stay here tonight?

I couldn’t believe he was asking me to stay with him. He stood up and started to put on his garbage collector uniform. It was on a nearby wardrobe in the dining room. If I had enjoyed seeing him naked, I really enjoyed watching him now as he was putting his uniform on. It couldn’t be dirtier or smellier. Stains of garbage filled it completely. He wore no shorts now. He would go commando. Dark garbage stains embellished more the dirt of this dirty man. The smell was intoxicating, combined with the smells of puke and shit there were in his dining room. I want a Mr. Roberts in my life, I thought. But I had not answered yet.

-I have nothing to do tonight. Why not? I might like to spend the night here.

-I only have a bed, but if you don’t like sleeping with me, I can sleep on the couch. Or we could sleep together. My bed is very narrow but I think there is room for both. I go to sleep naked as I spend all day at home. I won’t have any clothes on unless you ask me. I don’t think I need a shower soon. But you tell me.

-I will spend the night with you and you won’t have to sleep on the couch. I think neither of us needs a shower so soon. I am not used to sleeping naked but I could even try how I like to sleep naked beside you.

-Good, Patrick. Look, can you see this key? I will come back at about nine. You can go out for a walk and come back and open, or you can wait for me comfortably here in this sewer of mine, I mean house. But please all the time make yourself at home. There is nothing you can do in your own house that you can’t do here. In this wardrobe I have some porn movies in case you want to have that fun. Move freely through the house and do whatever comes to your mind.

-Thanks, Wayne. I will wait for you here.

Then we shook hands and he left, reminding me he would be back soon. I liked his smell trail as he was leaving. Now I was alone in this sewer of his and could have some fun.


Daniel Berasaluce

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