Paradise Lost

AUTHORS NOTE: Here's the new chapter. I hope you like. As always feel free to leave comments or suggestions.

CHAPTER 2

I was making my way to the last class of the day, chemistry. I hadn't seen Sam since 1st period and part of me was grateful for that, but there was also a part of me that was disappointed. When I walked into the chemistry room, the teacher, Ms. Slater, called me over to her desk.

'I hate to ask this of you Ryan, but would you mind staying a little while after class to help one of my other students with the new material? I know this is such short notice, but this is the only day he could stay after school and I have a faculty meeting.' she said, almost pleadingly.

I faked a smile and lied, 'Uh, sure I don't mind.'

'Thank you, Ryan' she said before going back to whatever she was working on.

I just gave another fake smile and went to my desk. The class was boring as usual and went by at glacial speeds, but finally the bell rang signaling the end of the day. I just kept my seat as everyone else left, waiting for the dumbass that was failing.

After about five minutes of waiting he finally showed up. Aiden walked into the room. Of all the people, why did it have to be him. He briefly looked at me before going over to the teacher.

Even though Aiden never said or did anything to me, I still hated him because he's the reason that everyone knows about me being gay. We had been best friends since before preschool. I loved him like a brother, until I got older and started loving him in a different way. I didn't want him knowing that I was gay because I was afraid that it might ruin our friendship. I resigned myself to the fact that he wasn't gay and that no matter what, I couldn't ever tell him how I felt about him. But those barriers that I put up for myself never lasted. There would always be something that he would say or do that would completely break my resolve to keep my secret from him. Like he would sometimes give me these sentimental, even loving, looks that made me want to just burst out and tell him how much I loved him. But no matter how much I wanted to, I was always able to control myself until two weekends ago, that last weekend that I would be able to call him a friend.

Long story short, I told him. I told him everything, about being gay and about being in love with him. He just stood there and looked at me before turning around, running out of the house and leaving. I was shattered, but deep down I knew it was my own fault. I knew not to tell him, but I did it anyway. I didn't hear from him all day Sunday and when I went in to school on Monday everybody knew what happened and I went from being mildly popular to being a bullied outcast.

He spoke with the teacher for a minute. He was probably trying to weasel his way out of having to work with me. She handed him some papers and gave instructions before leaving the room. He then made his way over to where I was sitting. Without a word he sat down and got his book and assignments situated. He didn't say anything to me and I didn't say anything to him. And so, without any hellos or even a nod, I began going over the last chapter which dealt with atomic half-life and decay.

I watched him as he worked on the assignments. He had light brown hair that was kept short and emerald green eyes. The sleeves of his shirt came up enough to show his slight farmer's tan and he was kind of stocky, but fit. This was the first guy I ever fell in love with, even if that love was completely one-sided. Now, however, that love has evaporated and has been replaced by resentment, not because he didn't love me back, but because he told everybody about me.

It took an hour, but he finally got the assignments done. As he was packing up his things he reached over to get the study guide that was on my desk. As he withdrew his hand it brushed against my own. When our hands made contact he jerked his back like he'd been burned. I looked at his face expecting anger, but instead I saw a hint of fear or maybe nervousness, I don't know it was hard to read. He quickly stood up and hurriedly left the room.

'Your welcome,' I said under my breath as I stood up to leave. I walked out of the room and headed for the exit when I realized I had to use the bathroom. When I got to the one near the main lobby I went inside. I was heading towards the nearest urinal when I heard something from one of the stalls. I stopped and listened and realized that there was a guy in there crying.

I walked over to the urinal and took a piss. He must've heard me because he stopped crying. I washed my hands, taking my time hoping he would come out so I could see who he was, but he stayed in there so I just left.

When I exited the building I made my way through the front pavilion towards the parking lot. I was brought out of my thoughts by a voice coming from one of the nearby benches.

'Hey, Ryan,' I turned around to see who it was before answering.

'H-hey, Sam,'

TO BE CONTINUED