MY TWO UNCLES PART 1
by Robert Furlong
It was Uncle Brendan who saw me first.
I was trying to be sneaky but he must have spotted me peeping round the door.
At first I thought I'd be in it deep and was about to duck out of view and dash off back to bed. But I held his gaze just long enough to see his mouth break into a smile and then heard him say to Uncle Paul, "Looks like we've got ourselves an audience!"
Uncle Paul, who was sort of squatting bent over in front of him, looked over and laughed when he saw me hovering in the doorway.
That's when I figured they weren't gonna make a big deal and call my mom and dad.
The two of them grinned over at me like that, still sort of rocking back and forth and doing whatever it was they were doing, then I heard Uncle Paul say, "It's okay, Bren, Sandy's always said she wants him to grow up with a liberal view of sex."
Sandy's my mom. She's also Uncle Paul's older sister.
And it's true that she wants me to be 'sexually broad-minded' as she puts it. She and dad never close their bedroom door even when they're making love and they know I'm spying on them. She says it's good that I see how the birds and bees work, whatever that means, and dad always laughs when he's putting me back to bed and sees how my cannon's raised high and making my pyjama bottoms stick right out.
It's all about me growing up without any embarrassment or hang-ups, or at least that's what mom says. So that's why I'd crept along to see what my two uncles were doing when I heard sounds like they were making love too.
"But who could they be making love to?" I'd wondered as I'd listened to them panting and grunting from along the corridor. There weren't any other women staying with them in the house - neither of them had wives or girlfriends or anything like that - and in any case the two of them were sharing the one spare bed we've got in the house.
When I'd peeped around the door, I'd found the two of them were the only ones in the room. They were both in their nuddies, which was kind of weird, and Uncle Brendan was behind Uncle Paul with their bodies sort of writhing against each other, moving together with a steady, gentle rhythm. I couldn't tell if they were wrestling or playing piggy-back or just having some stupid joke, but I was amazed at how sweaty they were and how hot and stinky the room had got.
That's when Uncle Brendan saw me in the doorway and Uncle Paul, who was bending over in front of him, looked over and laughed.
"Pretty curious were you, Matthew?" Uncle Brendan chuckled.
He kept doing his thing against Uncle Paul's butt, his hips grinding away at it without missing a beat.
"If you want to see what we're doing, you should come right in," Uncle Paul called over. "You don't have to spy around the doorway like a peeping Tom!"
"Will his mom be okay with him seeing this?" Uncle Brendan asked him, still pumping his hips back and forth a bit like dad does when he's doing sex stuff with mom.
"She'd be more pissed off if we sent him away," my mom's brother replied, just sort of squatting there pushing his butt back to meet Uncle Brendan's hips. "She'd say it was teaching him that what we're doing is somehow dirty or nasty."
"Come on in, then, chief," Uncle Brendan chuckled over to me. "Get a good look at how it's done when it's two guys doing it!"
I walked into the room and over to the end of their bed.
From that angle I could see that Uncle Brendan's pecker was pushed between Uncle Paul's butt-cheeks and sort of moving in and out, the way dad's does when he's going at it with mom. It looked very thick and hard, really slippy from all the goo that was on it, and his nuts were enormous too and pressing against the backs of Uncle Paul's legs.
At first I couldn't help but burst out laughing. I mean, he couldn't have his big chub up there for real, could he?
"What are you laughing at?" Uncle Brendan asked me.
"The way you guys are pressing up against each other," I giggled, "makes it look like your wick's up Uncle Paul's pooper!"
The two of them laughed back and I was pleased they could see the funny side of it. Uncle Brendan didn't pull away, though, and from what I could see, it really did look like he had the massive thing plugged up Uncle Paul's butthole. It was wedged between his cheeks and the big fat shaft of it disappeared off into the furry crack.
"So... er... what are you doing?" I asked, still chuckling at the idea that one man might shove his beanstalk up another man's fudge tunnel.
"What do you think we're doing?" Uncle Paul grinned back, still squatting on all fours with his butt pushed right back against Uncle Brendan's bush.
I didn't know what to say - what I wanted to say sounded too silly - so I just giggled and said I didn't know.
"What's it called when your mom and dad do this?" Uncle Brendan asked.
"Do what?" I asked.
"When your dad pushes his stick up inside part of your mom's body."
"Making love," I told him.
"Well, that's what we're doing too."
"But you guys can't make love," I chortled, just about creasing up. "I mean, you're two men, aren't you?!"
"That's exactly what we're doing," Uncle Paul said, smiling at my amusement. "This is what it looks like when two men are making love."
"Yeah?" I grinned hardly able to believe it. "You do it by letting him shove his dick up your butt?"
"It's not that I'm 'letting him', Matthew," he chuckled. "I'm doing this because I want to... because I'm enjoying it too!"
He pushed himself up a bit so I could see his beef-pole rising up from between his legs. It looked huge and its helmet was a deep shade of purple, covered in a shiny wet liquid that was oozing from its slit.
"Wow!" I laughed. "You've got a chubbie even bigger and thicker than dad's gets when he's doing sex stuff with mom!"
Uncle Paul laughed back. "That's what Uncle Brendan's wanger is doing to me... making me feel sexy the way it's sliding in and out of my bum!"
"That's awesome!" I kept laughing. "I didn't know that dudes could do sex stuff together!"
"Not all men do sex stuff," Uncle Paul explained, smiling at how interested I was watching Uncle Brendan's thick slippery rod sliding in and out of his butt-crack. "Only men who love each other, like me and Uncle Brendan do."
I couldn't believe how hairy he was back there. It was like a thick black forest sprouting out from between his big, round cheeks.
"What if you let out a fart?" I giggled. "While his todger's up your poop chute?"
Uncle Brendan found that hilarious but Uncle Paul just smiled answered the question. "It's polite to hold them in, Matthew! I'm sure your mom's taught you that!"
I nodded, still giggling at the thought of his big hairy butt-crack letting out a stinker of a fart around Uncle Brendan's thick donger.
When Uncle Brendan had stopped laughing he said, "But accidents do happen sometimes. More often, though, when your Uncle Paul is doing it to me."
"When Uncle Paul is doing it to you?" I repeated, not understanding.
Uncle Paul, still smiling, said, "We don't always make love like this, Matthew. Sometimes we do it the other way around and I push my jimmy up your Uncle Brendan's bum."
"Wow!" I laughed. "Mom and dad can't swap places like that!"
Uncle Brendan beamed down at me, with his massive chopper driving quickly in and out of Uncle Paul's gaping butthole.
"We make love in lots of ways," he told me. "We put our mouths around each other boners... lie down together so we can suck them for each other..."
"That is so boss!" I gasped. "Does it make the white stuff come out like dad's does when mom does it?"
"Sometimes," Uncle Brendan laughed. "But usually it's better when we make the white stuff come out by sliding them in and out of each other's bums."
"How else do you make love?" I asked, eager to learn how it worked when it was two men.
"Sometimes we lick each other's bottoms," Uncle Paul grinned over at me, still on all fours and really pushing his hips back to meet Uncle Brendan's thrusts.
I nearly fell about with laughter at the thought of them doing that.
"Come on, don't be daft!" I managed gasp, through gales of giggles. "I can't believe anyone would do that!"
"We do," Uncle Brendan proudly declared. "Not often, but sometimes."
"No you don't!" I insisted, still cracking up at the idea.
Uncle Paul said, "It's something that's only done by men who love each other very, very much."
"Okay then," I said, with a challenge to my voice. "Let's see you do it."
"Do you want to show him?" Uncle Brendan asked him, as if I couldn't hear. Then in more of a whisper, "You've seen that he's running a stiffie, haven't you?"
I was running a stiffie: he was right on that score. It was making the front of my pyjama bottoms stick out like I had a toy gun stuffed down there. I liked it that my two uncles both had big hard bong-ons while mine was, in its own smaller way, showing itself to be just as manly.
"I think it's great that he's curious," Uncle Paul said, pulling his butt away from Uncle Brendan's huge swollen porker. When the massive head of thing pulled out from Uncle Paul's back passage, his ringpiece accidentally let out a really loud fart that made him go bright red and sent me into another fit of giggles.
They kept talking while I was in stitches and it was only when I at last managed to pull myself together that I heard Uncle Paul finishing off what he was saying with, "... and it's only natural that he finds watching us sexy and exciting."
By the time I finally was able to look back over at them in their new positions on the bed, still tittering at how funny Uncle Paul's huge back blast had been, I saw that Uncle Brendan was standing up in front of my mom's brother with his back turned towards him so that his big muscly butt was right in front of his face. His crack was even hairier than Uncle Paul's had been; a coarse wiry undergrowth of it was bristling out from between his cheeks.
"Okay, Matthew," Uncle Paul said in a more serious voice like my teacher did when he thought things had got out of hand. "I'm going to lick Uncle Brendan's bum now, and I don't want you to laugh again like you just did, because this is a very special thing for two men to do together."
"Will he fart in your face?" I managed to say before setting myself off again.
When I'd settled down, he said, in that teacher voice again, "Uncle Brendan won't fart, I can promise you that. He'll just be enjoying having my tongue licking at his bumhole, just like I was enjoying having his stevie inside mine."
"Will he like it so much that it'll make him shoot his white stuff all over?" I asked.
"Perhaps," Uncle Paul said before Uncle Brendan joked: "It's more likely that your Uncle Paul will be shooting his white stuff all over while he's got his face pushed between my bum cheeks!"
I laughed but now I was fascinated: I'd have to watch Uncle Paul's pecker carefully in case it went off without me noticing just like dad's sometimes did.
Uncle Paul turned to the huge, round butt-cheeks in front of him and pressed his face into the hairy crack so that his mouth was right where the hole would be. I could see his mouth was moving as he worked his tongue in and out, and I couldn't believe how hard it made my wiener throb against my pyjamas as I watched him lapping at Uncle Brendan's pooper.
Uncle Brendan looked down at me and beamed a really big smile, then grabbed hold of his own big shlong and worked his hand quickly up and down its thick length. I smiled back at him, enjoying watching him doing something to himself that I liked doing to my own in my bed at night. I always liked it when I saw men jerking off with their knobs all horned-up. I'd seen my dad bashing away at his in the shed when mom was out shopping, and one day round my mate Jason's house we'd spied on his dad sitting on the toilet looking at a magazine with his wrist going at it full speed. Both times, white stuff had ended up shooting out of the men's bell-ends so I watched Uncle Brendan's intently in case his did the same.
When it didn't - when it was just his fist pounding the massive thing - I looked down at Uncle Paul's rock hard broomstick, in case it was about to start flinging its yoghurt.
He was rubbing his hand up and down his shaft even faster than Uncle Brendan was, while his mouth was munching away at the big hairy butt in his face. The head of it was bright red and had gone really shiny but there wasn't any white stuff squirting out of the slit and in the end I decided this was actually pretty boring.
I didn't want to watch guys make love by chewing on each other's butts - it was just about as dull as watching dad when he sticks his face in mom's boob. I wanted to see them sticking their poles up each other's tooshies. That had been the most fun: seeing their two big manly bodies joined together the way that mom and dad end up when they're doing it on their bed.
I said, "How long do you do it for? Like this, I mean."
Uncle Paul pulled his face away from licking between Uncle Brendan's butt-cheeks, and made me giggle by pulling some curly hairs off his lips.
He said, "Making love shouldn't be timed, Matthew. We do it for as long as it feels nice for us both."
I looked at Uncle Brendan's gaping crack, and saw how the forest of curly hair which was sprouting from it, was now wet and frothy where Uncle Pauls' mouth had been.
"What does it taste like?" I couldn't help but ask. "Is it dead nasty like poo?"
Uncle Paul chuckled and shook his head. "Of course not... it tastes beautiful and sexy... a very special sort of taste."
"Can I have a taste of it?" I asked, craning my head towards the furry trench between Uncle Brendan's muscular cheeks. I was fascinated to know what a 'sexy' taste was like. Whether it would be stinky or sweaty, or like the smell of dirty pants.
Uncle Paul laughed, "Proper little rim-rookie, isn't he?"
I wasn't sure what he meant by that, but I saw his big standing-up prick swell up even harder and the end get really fat and shiny.
"No, you can't do that," Uncle Brendan said with a kind smile. "It's something that only grown men do together, Matthew."
"Can I have a lick of yours, then?" I asked Uncle Paul, desperate to see what it was like.
With some things like scrounging for sweets at the supermarket, Uncle Paul will give in to stuff that Uncle Brendan won't. Something about him being my mom's brother makes him more likely to say yes.
Not this time, though.
"It's for men, Matthew, not young lads your age. You can try it all you want in a couple of years."
"He's gonna be really popular with the guys at college," Uncle Brendan laughed.
"Can I see you 'doing it' again?" I asked. "I mean, doing it properly like mom and dad do, but doing it up the pooper instead of a woman's veejay?"
"It's called making love," Uncle Brendan laughed, getting down on his knees and bending over in front of Uncle Paul. He reached back and put a hand on each of his butt cheeks and prized them apart while Uncle Paul shuffled up behind him.
I realised I was going to get to watch them doing it the other way round to how they'd been making love when I'd first seen them.
"Oh wow!" I called out. "Do you always do it both ways? Take turns to push your boners up each other's brown holes?"
Uncle Paul beamed over at me as he worked the big red head of his pecker into Uncle Brendan's hairy crack.
"Sometimes," he said, "but not that often. Usually Uncle Brendan makes love to me using my bum, but sometimes we like to do it this way too."
"That's ace!" I laughed. "It must get really boring for dad, having to always do it the same way round."
"I don't think he'd like doing it this way round," Uncle Brendan laughed back, as he pushed his big round butt back onto Uncle Paul's prick.
I watched as his long fat stalk-on slid slowly through Uncle Brendan's dookie-tube.
"Does it make your willy smell afterwards?" I asked. "Making love like this?"
"A little bit," he admitted. "But it's a nice sort of smell... it reminds me of being intimate with Uncle Brendan."
"Does it stink really bad when you take it out to pee?" I asked, fascinated by the thought that next time I was standing next to Uncle Paul or Uncle Brendan in the loo, one of their dicks might give me a whiff of the other uncle's butt.
"It doesn't stink," Uncle Paul laughed as his todger disappeared into the bristly forest of Uncle Brendan's butt crack. "But it does have a certain odour to it."
"Can other men smell it when you're using the public loo?"
I would hate for that to happen to me: for other lads at school to know I'd had my twig up someone's backdoor from the way it smelt when I was peeing.
It would be a dead funny way for me and dad to have a joke, though: for me and him and Uncle Paul to be peeing when we were out somewhere and for me to sniff the air and say to dad like I really meant it: "Can you smell Uncle Brendan's butt?"
We'd both sniff a few times like there was a definite smell coming from somewhere, then I'd lean over to take a whiff of Uncle Paul's big floppy cob as he peed.
I'd say, "Yeah! There it is! It's coming from Uncle Paul's todger! How come your dick smells of Uncle Brendan's butthole?!"
Dad would really laugh at that. I wondered if he knew how men make love when there isn't a woman for them to do it with. I wondered if he knew Uncle Paul and Uncle Brendan did it together using each other's poopers.
Uncle Paul just laughed and said, "Of course not, Matthew. It doesn't smell that strong. It hardly smells at all."
His hairy bush was now tickling Uncle Brendan's big meaty cheeks and his nads were pressing against the back of his thighs.
The two of them turned to me and grinned, their bodies locked together, before Uncle Paul started moving his hips back and forth so his pork-sword moved slowly in and out of the damp hairy crack. I just stared at them, enthralled by how amazing they looked as two grown men making love right in front of me.
Uncle Paul's steady rhythm gradually quickened until he started panting and his forehead ended up wet with sweat as he enjoyed the feel of having his chubbed-up dick deep up inside Uncle Brendan. I noticed Uncle Brendan was enjoying it too: his breath was getting faster as he smiled over at me and I saw him start to push his butt-cheeks back to meet Uncle Pauls' firm thrusts.
Just then Uncle Paul struggled to change his position: rising to his feet and sort of squatting behind Uncle Brendan who stuck his butt right out like he was taking a massive crap. Uncle Paul grabbed him by the shoulders and the two of them started going at it really quickly: so fast that Uncle Paul's hips made loud cracking sounds against Uncle Brendan's butt and so that rough I could hear his nuts slapping between them.
"Oh wow! That's wicked!" I called out as they really went for it together. Uncle Paul's dork was ramming in and out of Uncle Brendan's backside with long, curving sweeps. It was making Uncle Brendan's own big sausage bounce around underneath his belly as he kept pushing himself back to meet its frantic thrusts.
I heard Uncle Brendan whisper over his shoulder to Uncle Paul, "He really likes watching it gay-style, doesn't he? His boner is sticking right out again!"
"It's nice he's so curious to see how two men make love together," Uncle Paul said back to him, his voice becoming breathless from how fast and hard his hips were bucking.
"He's making a big wet patch around his knob-end. Any second now he gonna start whacking himself off!"
It was like I couldn't hear them; like I wasn't standing right there while they were doing sex stuff in front of me.
"Do you get a boner when you're watching your mom and dad making love?" Uncle Paul asked me.
"I guess," I shrugged. "It's not a bad thing, is it?"
"Of course it's not," he laughed, his face going red from how fast his jackhammer was going at it back and forth from Uncle Brendan's big sweaty butt. "It's natural to get aroused while you're looking at something sexy."
Just then the bedroom door swung open and dad peered around it, first surprised to see my uncles going at it on the bed and then even more wide-eyed at the sight of me standing watching them.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" he called over to me.
And I stared back at him, equally wide-eyed, suddenly uneasy at being caught spying on two men doing it together and even more embarrassed that my pyjama front was sticking right out at full-mast.
"I... I dunno..." I stammered, grabbing my crotch to hide my woodie. "They... er... they said I could watch them..."
"Is that true?" dad asked, turning to my uncles who were still at it at full speed, banging away together like the guinea pigs do in the biology lab at school. "Did you say he could watch you having sex like... like this?"
Dad's face looked shocked and his cheeks were bright red. What the hell sort of trouble had we all got ourselves into?
To be concluded