Struggling with the key, I try to balance the weight of my Uni text/note books in one hand and the shopping bags full of groceries in the other, while also trying to fit the key into the old and unreliable lock for my front door. Eventually everything unwittingly falls to the floor and I unlock the door untroubled. Gathering everything back up, I trudge into the kitchen ready to unpack all the junk food I had collected while out. "I'm not a very good shopper" I mutter to myself. Slowly my dog, Panda, comes out from hiding to say hello. I've had her as long as I can remember but she's getting quite old and frail now days.
It's a stormy day and has been the last couple of days. It's funny how sometimes the weather can feel so suited to your mood. The empty house is a little daunting on dark days like today so I turn all the lights on and the TV on for a little background noise. Sometimes I leave it on all night and pretend that I'm a little kid again trying to get to sleep while my parents chat in the lounge room.
Usually on these types of days Lockie would come over and stay with me or I would go to his house. He doesn't like stormy days either. I tremble at the thought of him now. I wish I could forget his hands on me, his strong, melding hands. I've never seen him so confident and strong as when he was kissing me, moving his body against me. And I've never before felt so weak, so taken by someone before. Normally I am the confident one, the one who takes charge and protects him. In his arms though, I was the one that needed help and he was strong and possessive and able.
I liked it. This thought keeps popping into my head with no consent at all from my brain. Now walking to my bed room, my mind attempts to understand this unwelcome thought. I enjoyed what we did. If I didn't then I would have stopped him. I wouldn't have been moaning at his touch. I wouldn't have grinded my hips against his and I wouldn't have let his ample lips touch my own.
It's a Thursday now and it's been a week since I last saw Lockie. I was a mess driving home that night. Eventually I held back my tears enough to get home safely in the early hours of the morning. Stepping inside the cold, empty house, I sunk against the door and started bawling again. The heady confusion I felt at that time has not at all waned and I'm still not sure how I feel.
All this week I have tried exceptionally to avoid any place at Uni where I may bump into him. I even started taking the long roots to my classes instead of the shorter conventional ones where I would normally run into him. This is the longest we haven't talked since we've met each other and for the first time in a long time that I've started to lose confidence in myself. I can't concentrate in my classes or finish homework assignments. I've mostly been trying to keep busy and avoid any form of deep thought. But being so lonely doesn't help that. I've never realised how many real friends I don't have. Lockie is probably the only one apart from an ex-girlfriend, Hayley, which I've known since we were born. We were born two days apart and our mothers became friends in the maternity ward of the hospital. Our families have been close ever since, but this week I couldn't talk to her about my problems, I don't know how she would react.
Now I hop into my bed. Having brushed my teeth and changed into some sweat pants and an old t-shirt, I slide swiftly under the covers trying to warm up. It was only eight o'clock at night but sleeping was an escape from my thoughts and that, I needed.
As much as I will it, sleep doesn't come to me. My mind is too busy with thought to rest and I am going to suffer for it.
And right on cue, I feel Lockie's breath on my neck. A shiver goes up my spine as I think about the feeling of his hands, his mouth, his... hardness against me.
I don't want to feel this way when I think about him. I don't want this thrill of excitement running through me; this overwhelming feeling of lust for him, or the twitching of my member between my legs.
But I can't help it. I let my mind over take me with all thing Lachlan James Lynch. I think about his long dark hair and the way my fingers weaved through it at the nape of his neck. I think about his green eyes and how they gazed into my soul, asking for an invitation to my body. I think about the soft peck of his beautiful big lips on my neck and on my mouth. And finally I think about the grace of his touch as his artists hands skimmed down my body to rest on my wanting behind.
As I think, my hand slowly removes itself from behind my head and the image of my bedroom roof drifts out of sight. My hand glides down my chest, now made bare by my uncontrollable hands. Bit by bit my hand moves through the thin light trail of hair leading down my stomach and toward my throbbing hardness. My fingers then slip under the waistline of my pants. Reaching my neatly trimmed pubic hair and weaving through it searching for something much more substantial, my hands eventually find it. I moan as my hand grips the base of my cock.
Now I think about the forceful nature of Lockie's hands. The way he pulled my hips against his with a force I did not know he was capable of. The way he pushed me roughly against the door. The way he took charge...
My hand slowly starts straying from the base of my cock and moving up my member. My fingers only just fit around it. Reaching the tip, my fingers roll over the head of my un-cut cock and then stray back down to the base. I moan at the unbelievable pleasure and my hand begins to move faster. My other hand now moves to my chest and to my nipple. Squeezing and teasing the raised nipple, I am reminded how Lockie was so close to taking off my shirt.
Now I am taken to a place where we were never interrupted; where he could have continued his ravishment of my body. The movement of my hand begins to speed up and my hips begin to move in time with the rough rhythm I am creating.
I picture him removing my shirt with his strong and sure fingers. His luscious mouth would then be straight back onto my body. His kisses would trail down my sensitive neck and I would squeal playfully and then moan as he reaches one of my pleading nipples. His mouth I can feel on me now. His sucking with fervour is turning me on beyond belief and my moaning and groaning has reached an all-time high.
He would then swap nipples focussing the same amount of time on the other one to my grateful appreciation. But now I feel his hands. Drifting down the sides of my body and further past my narrow waist, his searching hands move to the front of my begging body. Like my own have, his hands trail through my pubic hair to my rigid shaft where he grips it roughly. I gasp in pleasure and his mouth leaves my pleased nipples.
Licking a trail down the centre of my stomach, I am in heaven. He eventually reaches what he desires and timidly at first, he gently licks the head of my quivering cock. His eyes look up at me as, so slowly, he sinks his ample lips around my cock. With his hands resting on my upper thighs, I can feel every movement as he slowly but surely sinks down the eight inches of my cock to rest his chin on my tight ball sack. Reaching the hilt of my member, his eyes still watch me face, reading my reaction. He starts to back off after a moment's stillness.
And I scream his name as in a sudden motion he sinks back down on my cock. I scream his name multiple times as he repeats the up and down motion, swallowing my wanting cock and staring up into my now ravenous eyes. I beg for him to keep going, to never ever stop. I gasp, I moan, I whisper to him. I place my hands on the back of his head and guide him. I want more, I don't know what more is but in this moment I don't care. I just want all of Lockie. Everything he is, I want in this building moment.
Wrapped up in all the pleasure, I only barely notice the movement of Lockie's hands from the base of my cock. He moves them down in between my legs and for a second holds my bloated balls and rolls them around in his fingers. This causes a yelp from me but he is quickly moving on.
I suddenly felt the pressure of his finger pushing on my hole. This new and unexpected pleasure was such a surprise. I didn't know where it came from or that it could feel this good. So that was it for me. I moaned his name deep and throaty and I was in heaven. Giving in to the pleasure, I felt spurt after spurt of cum leave my cock. In thick streams, I never thought it would end.
Eventually, I drift back into the reality that is my life.
Now out of my fantasy world, I stare at the unbelievable amount of cum splattering my chest, neck and sheets. Never have I cum this much before and all I can think is that I wish it was in Lockie's mouth back in my fantasy.
Interrupting my hazy reverie, I can hear a phone. The annoying and insistent ringing stems from my bedside table and with reluctance I reach over a pick up our obnoxiously loud home phone.
"Hello" I growl at the caller. Who would dare interrupt me in my moment?
"Will... ah, it's me. It's Lockie."