Gay porn wasn't easily accessible back then. Hell, plain straight porn wasn't very accessible in 1984. The first time I ever saw a gay porn was when I went to an adult bookstore that I'd been to once or twice. I quickly discovered the booths there and saw a couple that had holes in the wall that separated one booth from another. I knew enough to know that those were glory holes what they were used for. I walked around the store for a little bit, got some tokens and headed for the booths. I chose one with a glory hole on purpose. I didn't think I'd actually use it, but the thought that I might excited me anyway. I flipped through the channels and quickly landed on one where a someone was riding a cock with their ass. I thought it was just a straight porn until the shot changed and one guy got off of another guy and they changed positions. Just seeing a gay porn turned me on to no end. I pulled my dick out and started stroking it. Movement out of the corner of my eye drew my gaze to the glory hole. Some guy had his finger inserted into it and was rubbing it back and forth. I was excited and scared. I didn't know what to do, but it turned me on that he was doing that and that maybe he knew I was watching gay porn. It wasn't long before I came and quickly put my dick back in my pants. I left the theater quickly.
Like I said, porn wasn't accessible, but I'd lucked into a VHS copy of a movie called, "Anytime, Anyplace" and I watched it over and over again. The funny thing was that I almost always fantasized about having sex with a man when I did. There was one preview where this woman was down by this guy's big cock as he came. She moved her mouth over to it and came away with a big glob of cum in her mouth and partially on her lips. She pushed the part on her lips into her mouth and swallowed. I imagined doing the same thing and I would always be ready to cum right then, but I'd back off and watch more. A scene from "Taboo" had Mimi Miyagi getting fucked and as the guy pulled out to cum, she pulled him up as he shot it on her belly and then into her waiting mouth. Again, I'd hold out and get right to the edge before I backed off. I'd finally fast forward to a scene in the main movie where this guy fucked Seka in the ass. His dick was big and she road it with abandon. I'd shoot my load as I imagined riding that big cock.
Other movies showed guys pulling out right before they came and shooting cum all over a pussy or ass before burying themselves right back where they came from and pushing their seed deep inside. I loved picturing a man pulling out of me and then me holding his dick against my hole and watching him drop a big load right in the center before I pulled him back into me. I could feel the sticky warmth hitting my ass and then imagined that I'd shoot my own huge load once his was inside me. I wanted to do that so much, but these were the days before I'd actually done anything. Sometimes I'd watch those movies before calling a gay man I knew who was 40 years older than me. As I've told in another story, he was actually my first, but these were the days before that happened. The days when I'd call him late at night and just talk on the phone while surreptitiously masturbating. I didn't know that it was obvious that's what I was doing. I really thought he had no idea.
The first few times he and I actually fucked I was too nervous to really be bold and tell him my fantasies so the sessions always ended with me jacking him off or with him just shooting off deep inside me, which I liked, but it wasn't the complete fantasy. However, one night he asked me how I'd pictured sex with him before it actually happened. He was clear that he wanted details so I agreed to tell him. I hadn't been at his house long and he'd already talked me down to my underwear which barely held back the raging erection I already had. He remained fully dressed. He took me by the hand and led me back to his bedroom, pulled the sheets back and told me to get naked and lie down. I moved quickly to do as he asked me. He stood at the edge of the bed and I scooted over to where my face was even with his crotch. I started telling him about my fantasies and he pushed his crotch into my face. I reached up with my hand and stroked his quickly hardening dick through his pants. As I described in detail what the scenes were and what the setup was. He unzipped his pants and let me rub him through his boxers, but he quickly popped out of the fly and I was soon stroking his bare meat, which caused me to start grinding into the sheets. As I described the woman swallowing cum, he asked me if I'd fantasized about doing the same. All I could do was nod as I focused on jacking his big cock.
"Keep doing that and you'll get your wish soon," he told me.
That was all I needed to hear. I'd only tasted his precum to this point, but I was ready to take it further now and he was more than willing to accommodate me. He took his cock from me and lifted my chin as he eased his dick into my waiting and hungry mouth. I licked and sucked it with abandon and he teased me by rubbing it all over my lips and face. He abruptly stopped and pulled back to remove his clothes. Once fully nude, he lay down on the bed and pushed me back to his waiting dick.
"Use your hand while you suck. Jack my cock while you do it," he directed. I obliged willingly and then he said, "I have saved this load the whole week so you're going to really get a big one. Don't waste it and don't cum until you've taken good care of it. I don't want you to lose that enthusiasm and excitement and you don't want to either."
I stopped with the absent minded stroking of my own hardness and moved my body to keep from brushing against anything. Just about any touch would have led me to cum at that point. I focused on his pleasure and have his dick 100% of my attention. He told me to look him in the eye and I did as he slipped his cock in and out of my mouth.
This went on for a few minutes and he started to quicken his pace like he always did when he was about to cum. I knew my treat was on the way as he pulled out of my mouth and I watched as his cum rose to the tip of his dick and started flooding out. It was so thick and deeply white. Just like in the porn, I stuck my tongue out and grabbed the biggest part of his load, which also dribbled on my chin. It was warm and I actually liked the taste as I swallowed and licked my lips to get the rest of that first taste. Then I just stuck his dick right in my mouth and licked furiously on the head as he continued to shoot his liquid out and onto my tongue. My excitement reached a boiling point and I shot my own load without anything touching my dick. I rolled his cock around in my mouth until he softened and finally pulled away a little.
"Now, clean it all up really good and don't leave any," he told me as I started to lick the length of his cock and balls, happily taking all he'd given me. I finally looked up at him and he said, "Oh, you missed some," as he pointed to a glob on his belly and then scooped it up with his finger and put it in my mouth. He then had me lay back and he rubbed my own cum into my cock. I asked if he liked hearing my fantasy and he enthusiastically said he did. He suggested that I start coming over on Friday nights that summer before I went to college. He said we could do one a week and he'd help me realize my fantasies.
"No girls this summer, Lance. There'll be time for that at school in the fall. I want you to focus on me. I have a lot to teach you and I want you to spend a little time enjoying this. I want to take you on some dates and treat you like my boy deserves to be treated. You have a lot left to learn. I know the summer right after high school is for having fun, letting loose, and sowing your oats. You can sow them with me as often as you want."
I nodded in agreement and pictured what my summer would be. It would turn out to be the most satisfying 3 months of my life and I had no idea how much I'd grow to love loving an older man.