I was in a complete daze as I got out of the shower, dried myself off and put my clothes on. I knew I was clean but I still felt like Tyler’s cum was on my back, burning into me as if I’d been branded by him.
My legs still trembled as I scooped up my bags and left the locker room just as the class was beginning to leave the gym, all of them covered in sweat. I wondered what Coach had made them do, though nothing could compare to what just happened between me and Tyler.
I didn’t stop to talk to anyone. The only thing I could think about was getting out of there because I was convinced that someone would be able to tell what had happened just by looking at my face or into my eyes. Part of me never wanted anyone to find out about it because Tyler was such a dick and Jake would probably hate me for even letting him touch me. Another part wanted to run straight to Emily to tell her everything because I knew she’d get a kick out of hearing the details and would be asking for more.
When I got to Jake’s car I was the only person in the parking lot since most people were still in class. I leaned back against the door, tilted my head up toward the sky and closed my eyes. My body was still on fire from Tyler’s touch and I wanted so badly to have those big hands back on me. Why couldn’t he just be a nice guy so this would be simple?
A few minutes passed and I was still lost in my daze when I heard Jake’s distinctive deep chuckle and looked over to see him with his arm thrown around Tina’s shoulder. He had her pulled close and his head was tilted so it touched hers as they laughed and joked with each other. You would have thought they had been dating for months or even years with the way they were acting but it couldn’t have been more than a few hours.
As they approached the car Jake barely even glanced at me, only looking at me long enough to nod, though I didn’t know if that was a greeting or his way of telling me to move. He hit the remote on his keys to unlock the doors and walked straight to the front passenger door with Tina still on his arm, giving me no choice but to step back. When they had enough room Jake opened the door for her. She was just about to lower herself into the seat when he put his hand on her arm and pulled her into a deep kiss that was clearly open mouthed. She reached up and put her hands on the sides of his face as they made out no more than two feet in front of me. I felt like I was going to be sick, like someone had kicked me in the balls, punched me in the stomach and ripped out my heart all at the same time. I even thought I saw Jake just open his eye enough to look at me to make sure I was watching.
When they broke apart Jake helped Tina into the seat and closed the door behind her. He finally looked up at me long enough to make eye contact and a huge smile spread across his face. He was so proud of that kiss. If we were jocks we probably would have high-fived, but we weren’t, or at least I wasn’t. I just thought he looked smug. After what happened on Saturday he was making a point that I would never get to kiss him like that again. It was the first time I ever wanted to knock a smile off his face.
“Are you getting in?” he said before turning to walk to the driver’s door.
I stared at his back as he walked away and did my best to pick my jaw up off the ground. What the hell was that? It was like I didn’t even know the guy now and he was just giving me a ride out of courtesy and not because he actually liked me. I pulled open the back door and climbed in, only just getting the door closed when Jake started the engine and pulled out of his parking space.
He ignored me for the entire journey, instead focusing on Tina next to him. The way he was all over her, even when he was driving, was making me sick. Even if I hadn’t been in love with him I would have wanted to slap him for being such a tool.
We pulled up at my house without so much as a word. I looked at Jake but he was too busy nuzzling his face against Tina’s neck, making little kissing noises. It really was like he was putting on a show for my benefit, especially after the first kiss, and I wondered what he would do when he was left alone with her. I shook my head in disgust and climbed out of the car, slamming the door hard behind me. As I walked up my driveway Jake sped off down the road without even saying goodbye. He might as well have spit in my face because that’s what this whole cold shoulder bullshit felt like. I hated that things had changed and that I was at least partly to blame.
I went straight into the kitchen when I entered my house and sat down at the breakfast bar, putting my head in my hands. I wanted to scream. I knew something like this would happen if I ever told Jake, which was why I didn’t want to and was okay with never saying anything to him. At least before I had him as a friend, even if I was secretly in love with him, but now that everything was out in the open I wasn’t sure I had him as anything but my ride to school, if I even still had that after today.
“What’s up, bro?” Ryan asked from somewhere behind me.
I slowly lifted my head out of my hands and turned to look at him. He seemed genuinely concerned.
“I screwed up bad,” I said.
“Why?” he asked.
“Thinking I could mess around with Jake and nothing would happen.”
Ryan’s face suddenly turned serious and he came to sit on the seat next to mine. “DID something happen?”
“He pretty much blanked me all day. He’s never done that before, no matter what we’ve fought about.”
“So he’s not talking to you?”
“No,” I said. “He seemed okay this morning but we barely spoke on the way to school and then once we were there it was like I didn’t exist. He latched on to this girl and stuck by her side all day. He didn’t even eat lunch with us like he always does. Then he gave her a ride home and was all over her in front of me. And now I sound like a whining bitch.”
“You kind of do,” Ryan laughed. “But I get it.”
“Yes. Marcus was the same with me.”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“After we fucked he went all weird on me, making excuses not to see me and to not be in our dorm. For like two weeks after we got back to college after Christmas break he brought a different girl back to the room pretty much every night to bang in front of me to prove how straight he was. Some guys just can’t handle the experimenting thing. It messes with their head. Jake probably just needs a little time. It’s only been like two days. Give him some space. Let him prove to himself that he still likes women, that he’s still a man. This time next week he’ll be the Jake you’ve always known.”
“I hope you’re right,” I said.
“You just wait and see,” Ryan smiled. “And if I’m wrong I’ll go kick his ass for messing with my little brother.”
Ryan threw his arm around my shoulder and pulled me close so he could ruffle my hair. I tried to get away from him, squirming in his grip. Suddenly his hand froze and he took a really deep sniff before pulling back to look at me with a smirk.
“What?” I asked.
“You smell like cum,” he grinned.
“What?!” I screamed, jumping up.
Ryan almost fell off his chair laughing, “Relax, bro. You smell like soap too. But seriously, what gives? Did you get laid?”
I know I went bright red because the smile on Ryan’s face only grew wider. He shook his head in disbelief.
“Wow,” he said. “My little bro finally got fucked. And in school… way to go, Ev!”
“I didn’t get fucked,” I said in protest.
“Then what did you do?”
It was still surreal to be so open about things, especially sex, with my older brother, but we had talked about so much in the past couple of days that I knew now wasn’t the time to start holding back.
“We…” I started but was immediately interrupted.
“Who’s we?” Ryan asked.
“Me and Ty-“ I stopped myself before I said his full name and felt my heart jump into my throat when Ryan’s eyes went wide in reaction.
“No way!” Ryan said, jumping out of his seat. “You’re fucking Tyler Goodwin?”
To say I was stunned wouldn’t come close to describing how I felt.
“You know him?” I stuttered.
“I know OF him,” Ryan said. “He’s the biggest stud in the school. I might not have been there in five years but I’m not totally out of the loop. Seriously bro, he could have anyone he wants, Hell I’d even think about bending over for him, but he’s picked you. That’s a big deal.”
“I know,” I said, “I’m still trying to get my head around it. It doesn’t make sense for so many reasons but after today I know he really wants me and it’s not just some game. He makes me feel so hot and I really wanted him to fuck me.”
“So why didn’t he if you both wanted it?”
“Because we were in the showers in the locker room. Anyone could have walked in.”
“That was the only reason you said no?” Ryan asked, looking directly into my eyes.
“Ryan, you can’t tell anyone about this yet, okay? Tyler would kill me if it got out.”
“Don’t worry, bro, I know the score. It’s between you and me until you decide to tell someone else.”
“So come on, was the fear of being caught the only reason you said no?”
“Yes,” I finally admitted. “I told myself it was because he’s an asshole but when things really got going that didn’t matter because if we’d have been almost anywhere else I would have let him fuck me.”
“So what happened? I mean you said he didn’t fuck you but you still ended up covered in his cum.”
I chuckled hearing the words come out of Ryan’s mouth. “He tripped me during gym class and we both got sent out by Coach. At first I thought he did it on purpose to stop me beating him but now I think he did it so he could get me alone.”
“Obviously it worked,” Ryan smiled.
“Yeah it did,” I said. “After he got his ass chewed out by Coach he came into the showers and kissed me. I was terrified someone would see us but it felt so damn good and I started kissing back. We were so hard, rubbing our cocks together, and then we ended up with him standing behind me, humping his dick against my ass while he jerked me off and kissed my neck. I came so fucking hard and he shot his load up my back.”
“Damn,” Ryan said. “What are you thinking about it all now?”
“That I really want his dick inside me,” I said without even thinking.
“Shit, bro,” Ryan laughed, “Who knew you were such a little slut?
“I know,” I said, seriously. “Saturday night I had Jake about ready to fuck me, he was actually inside me for a couple of seconds. I wanted him so bad. And then today with Tyler… I’m getting hard now just thinking about it.”
Ryan burst out laughing. “You really are a horndog. Cumming once with a hot guy’s dick against your ass isn’t enough, now you’re gonna go upstairs and rub one out thinking about it being IN your ass.”
“Who says I am?” I grinned.
“That wet spot on your pants does,” Ryan pointed.
I looked down and sure enough there was a growing dark spot on my pants where my cock was leaking. I reached down and squeezed my dick. My hand on it didn’t compare to Tyler’s but it still felt good. All I could hear was Ryan’s laughter as I went upstairs to take care of it before Mom and Dad came home.
After dinner Mom went round to one of the neighbors to gossip or do whatever women do, which left me, Ryan and Dad in front of the TV watching a game. It was really cool to just be sitting there with them, enjoying the action on screen.
At half time Dad flicked the channel to WWE Raw and we watched for a moment as two of the wrestlers in tiny trunks rolled around on the floor in headlocks and body scissors. It’s one of those things that should be really hot, with two sexy guys with awesome bodies in such close contact, but I think the context takes away from it somewhat so while I found it entertaining it wasn’t turning me on.
As a commercial break came on Dad flicked back to the game and got up to get a drink. On his way back to his seat he patted Ryan on the shoulder and said, “So, Ry, are you home for good now?”
Ryan suddenly froze in his seat and just stared at Dad before lowering his head, which turned into a nod.
“Alright, what the hell is going on?” Dad said, sitting on the edge of his seat so he was almost perched as if ready to attack. “I’m sorry, Ry, but I need to know. You’ve just abandoned your life and moved back here. What did you do that was so wrong?”
Ryan was silent for a moment and then took a deep breath. He raised his head so he was looking Dad straight in the eye. “I cheated on Paige.”
“You dumb shit,” Dad sighed in disbelief. “You find the perfect girl and you go and screw someone else?”
“I know, okay, I know,” Ryan shouted. “Don’t you think I’ve kicked myself every day for being such a fuck up? I hate myself for what I did but I tried to make it right.”
“Tried how?” Dad asked.
“It was two months ago, Dad,” Ryan said. “I didn’t even know the girl. It was a one night, uncontrollable mess. I can’t even defend it. I don’t know why I did it but I did.”
“How did Paige find out?”
“I told her,” Ryan said. He was more certain of himself now and his voice was getting stronger. “I felt like shit and she could see that something was wrong so I owned up. She punched me and kicked me out. I slept on a friend’s sofa for a week while I tried to talk to her but she wouldn’t listen. Our mutual friends stopped talking to me and I ended up having to rent some crappy room in this shared house for six weeks. I tried everything to get Paige to listen but she wouldn’t. There was nothing left so I came home.”
Dad said nothing he just nodded his head in what appeared to be approval or understanding.
“I didn’t mean to hurt her, Dad,” Ryan continued. “I loved her. I still do.”
“And you tried everything you could to get her back, to apologize and ask for forgiveness?”
“Yes,” Ryan said to Dad before turning to look at me, “But there’s only so much a guy can do. Eventually you have to accept that things aren’t going to happen the way you wanted them to and you need to move on.”
“Have you moved on?” Dad said.
“What?” Ryan asked, clearly stunned.
“Well, I heard you sneaking out last night after you thought your mom and I were asleep. I assume you weren’t just going out to cry in the yard,” Dad smiled.
“No,” Ryan admitted. “I went out to meet her.”
“And who is her?” Dad asked, looking Ryan right in the eye.
Now it was Ryan’s turn not to speak. He had this look of guilt on his face that made him look ten years younger, like he was afraid Dad was going to scream at him.
“Ry?” Dad asked again.
Ryan took a deep breath and said under his breath, “Emily.”
Dad jumped up from his chair, “Emily? Ev’s Emily?”
“Yes,” Ryan stated.
“Are you fucking crazy?”
“No,” Ryan protested. “She’s eighteen. She’s legal. And we both like each other.”
“You’d better make damn sure you’re telling me the truth now boy. That girl is like a daughter to me and your mother and if she’s just some rebound lay you’re going to toss aside once you’ve got your rocks off you’ll be back out that door.”
I could see that Ryan was stunned but then he stood up from his chair and from the expression on his face I knew he was serious when he said, “I’m not just screwing around, Dad. I like her. Really like her. I think there could be something there and I want to at least explore it.”
Dad’s face softened a little, “Promise me you’re being safe and smart.”
“For fucks sake, I’m not stupid, Dad. Besides, it’s not me you should be having this conversation with,” Ryan said and immediately after I could see he regretted it.
Dad looked at me to see me staring at him with my eyes wide. “What does he mean by that, Ev?”
“I… I don’t know,” I stammered.
“Are you having sex?” Dad asked.
I felt my face flush and closed my eyes, trying to pretend I wasn’t sitting in my living room being asked that question by my father.
“No,” I said. “Not technically.”
Dad sat down on the sofa next to me and patted my knee. “You’ve found a guy you like?”
I nodded my head because my whole body felt dehydrated and I couldn’t talk.
“I’m guessing it’s not Jake?” Dad asked.
“No,” I squeaked.
“But you like this guy?”
“And you’re using your head and not just your dick?”
“Yes, Dad,” I said, “Believe me.”
Dad nodded and got up. He walked across the room and went over to his liquor cabinet. He reached into the back and pulled out a box of condoms, which he tossed right at me. I caught them, stared down at the box and then up at him.
“I knew this day was coming,” Dad smiled. “I don’t care who you have sex with or whether you’re the top or bottom or whatever the hell it is you kids are calling it these days, just play safe, okay?”
I couldn’t believe my dad was giving me a box of condoms and was basically telling me he was okay with me having sex with guys as long as I made sure one of us was wearing a rubber.
“And when I say be careful I don’t just mean cover your cock,” Dad continued with a smile. “Choose the right guy, Ev, someone you can trust. Your mom won’t admit it but she’s scared for you because she’s heard horror stories of gay guys being picked up and killed by homophobes.”
I laughed at that and so did Ry. “Don’t worry, Dad, I’m not gonna go into some random club or stand on a street corner, bend over and put out an open invitation on my ass.”
“Yeah,” Ryan agreed. “Ev’s ass is like a really exclusive restaurant. You have to be on his list to get inside.”
All three of us burst out laughing and sat down to finish watching the game, chatting and just talking shit like a family does.
The rest of the night was pretty quiet. I didn’t hear a word from Jake and I couldn’t help but wonder if he was still with Tina, if he had taken her out on a date or just back to his so he could give her his beautiful cock. I hated being so jealous of a girl I hardly knew but it killed me to think Jake was with someone else.
Tyler never sent any kind of message either. I tried to tell myself it was just because he was busy with one thing or another but in the back of my mind there was always a voice telling me he was just messing with me and now he knew I’d let him fuck me he’d lost all interest.
The next morning when I woke up I had throbbing morning wood with the head of my dick all sticky against my abs. I reached down and wrapped my hand around it. My mind immediately went back to Tyler and his hands, but then having not heard from him since we both came in the showers I was a bit pissed at him so I pushed him out of my thoughts. The same thing happened again when I started thinking about Jake. I was too angry to rub myself off thinking about him like I had done so many times before. In frustration I threw off my covers and went straight to the shower, turning on some freezing cold water that crashed down on my body like thousands of tiny little icicles piercing my skin. I gasped and held back a cry as my dick shrank and any thoughts of jerking off disappeared.
When I was dried and dressed I headed downstairs for some breakfast. Mom was still in the kitchen. She smiled at me and said she was making pancakes. I felt my stomach do a little jump of excitement and was just about to sit down on a stool when she asked me if I could take out the trash. I walked over, grabbed the black bag and headed outside.
The lid on the trash can was moist with morning dew as I threw it open and tossed the bag inside. The plastic had barely left my fingers when I felt a hand close around my arm. I jumped and spun around to fight my attacker but I was quickly over powered and pushed against the wall as a large hand covered my mouth so I wouldn’t scream.
My breath was caught in my throat, both from the shock and from the impact of my back hitting the wall. It took a moment for my eyes to focus but when they did I realized I was looking up into those unmistakable blue eyes of Tyler’s that were so intense. A grin spread across his face and he slowly moved his hand from over my mouth.
“Morning,” he said in his deep, almost raspy voice.
“What are you doing here?” I panted, still in shock.
“What kind of a greeting is that for the guy who made you cum harder than you ever have in your life?”
“Shut the fuck up, my Mom is in there, she might hear you.”
“Aww, you’re so cute,” he grinned, brushing my cheek with his thumb.
“What are you doing here?” I asked again.
“I couldn’t stop thinking about you last night,” he said, leaning in close so I could feel his warm breath on my face. “I can’t tell you how good it felt to have my dick against your ass. I was awake half the night wishing you were in bed next to me so I could roll over and slide inside you.”
Just hearing him say those words had my dick hard again and I wished I could have been in his bed, feeling his hard body pressed against mine as he pushed his cock inside me.
“I thought you got what you wanted yesterday,” I managed to say after a moment. No words had ever been harder to say than those were. My mouth was completely dry.
“Not even close,” Tyler said, pressing his whole body against mine so our legs, stomachs, chests and hard dicks were pressed against each other. Our faces were less than an inch apart.
“One little jerk off session in the showers isn’t enough. I want all of you. I want to fuck you, Evan, over and over and over again.”
I felt his dick flex and pulse against me. I wanted to reach down to touch it, to wrap my hand around it and jerk him off right there beside my house, but my conscience got the better of me and I just stared into his eyes.
“You didn’t text last night,” I said, only realizing how pathetic it sounded once the words were out of my mouth.
“That’s because Joe was at my house all night,” Tyler said. “He would have seen me texting and would have been asking all kinds of questions I’m not ready to answer yet.”
I nodded my head silently in understanding. I wanted to ask him about Joe and if anything had happened between them but I knew it wasn’t the time to bring up their relationship yet, or whatever it was the two of them had going on. He had to trust me before he would tell me anything like that.
“Why are you here?” I asked again, never having got an answer.
“Because I couldn’t stop thinking about you,” he said. “I woke up this morning and my first thought was about how much I wanted to kiss you.”
Before I could say another word, his mouth closed over mine and he took my face in his big hands. Both of our mouths remained closed for the first few kisses and then slowly they opened, almost at the same time, allowing our tongues to meet and dance around each other.
We were moaning into each other’s mouths when I heard a car door being slammed shut in the driveway. My eyes went wide and I pushed Tyler back enough so his lips weren’t on mine. We were both panting as we looked at each other.
“Hey Jake, what’s up?” Ryan called, probably from his bedroom window. “Mom’s making pancakes and Ev’s just taking out the trash. Go around back, the door’s open.”
“Oh shit,” I said, panicking, not wanting Jake to see me with Tyler.
I looked around quickly for somewhere Tyler could hide but his body was just too big, nothing would conceal him, and he couldn’t run around back because Mom would see him through the kitchen window. Jake’s footsteps were getting louder on the pavement and I knew he was close. My panic got the better of me and I reacted by putting both hands in the middle of Tyler’s chest and shoving him backwards. I watched in what seemed like slow motion as he stumbled back, struggling to stay on his feet, his big arms flailing until the backs of his legs crashed into the bushes that separated our house from the neighbors’ and he went sailing over the top, disappearing into their yard.
I was just about to run over to check he was okay when Jake walked around the corner of the house with a smile on his face. I swallowed hard, feeling my body still trembling from almost being caught, and forced a smile onto my own face.
“Hey,” I squeaked, nodding toward Jake as I held out my hand for our usual morning fist bump.
“Hey,” Jake said, grabbing my fist instead of bumping it. He pulled me into a tight hug that had my cheek pressed against his and his big arms wrapped around my back. I wanted to turn my head to kiss that soft skin on his face but there were so many reasons why I shouldn’t.
When we broke the hug, Jake threw his arm around my shoulder and smiled at me. What the hell was going on with him? Yesterday he barely even noticed I existed or he purposefully ignored me and then now here he was being all friendly with his hands all over me. What was I supposed to think? Were things okay now that he’d done whatever he did with Tina? Was this all just some act and he’d be back to ignoring me later? I wanted answers but there was no way I could just ask without causing even more problems.
I let Jake lead me toward the door with his arm still over my shoulder. When we got to it I stopped to let Jake go in first so I could turn and look behind me. Tyler was looking over the top of the bushes at me. I couldn’t tell if he was angry or smiling but I didn’t have time to dwell on it. I shrugged my shoulders, held up my hands and said sorry before I ducked inside and closed the door.
To be continued…