A few days after our San Diego trip, I was on the phone talking to Will.

'Hey TJ, how's it going?'

'Um, fine, fine, Will. Um, what are you doing Friday night?'

'Friday? Well, I guess me and Peggy will catch a movie or something. Why?'

Peggy was Will's girlfriend, but I don't think she had the hots for my best friend in the same way I did. I doubted she'd ever deep-throated his man-meat.

'Oh, okay,' I said. I was disappointed that Will wasn't able to come over and hang with me considering the mess I'd gotten myself into with Joey's cousin. But I tried not to let my voice give me away.

'Why TJ? What's up? Do you have something better I should be doing?'

'Um, well, no, I mean, yes, well. I don't know?' I stammered, losing my cool completely. I covered the phone with my hand.

'TJ, what's going on with you lately? You been a little weird,' Will said. He was right, of course. I'd been having sex with just about every guy who crossed my path lately. And it was still completely freaking me out!

'Nothing,' I lied.

'TJ cut the shit! Why are you asking me about Friday night? Do you need something?'

I stared at the phone and didn't answer.



'TJ, talk to me. What's up dude?'

I felt my eyes tear up a little. I sniffed.

'I, I just seem to have gotten myself into something I can't handle,' I said finally.

'What is it TJ? Drugs?'

I burst out laughing.

'Is that it TJ? Are you into coke or something?'

I kept laughing.

'No, no, no, it's nothing like that,' I giggled. 'Do you think I could afford coke?' I asked, wiping my eyes with the back of my sleeve.

Even though we had both turned 18 last year I know for a fact that neither one of us had ever touched anything like that. We had smoked grass a few times but nothing more.

'I don't know,' Will said. 'Is coke expensive? I have no idea.'

'Um, I think so. Anyway, shut the fuck up! I'm not on coke. I'm not even smoking any pot lately unless Andy gets us some.' Our new buddy from New York seemed to have an endless supply. Will and I reasoned that it was an east coast thing.

'Okay then. Well that's good. I'm glad,' Will said with some finality. There was another awkward pause.

'So what is it then?'

I wiped my eyes again. 'Will, you'll think it's really stupid.'

'TJ, just tell me. What's going on?'

It's true. Will was always there for me. For whatever I needed. He was easily the coolest guy in the world. Why couldn't I just talk to him?

I waited and breathed in and out. Shit, fuck, piss!

'Okay, okay, here goes. But promise me you won't think it's stupid.'

'TJ, so many things you do are stupid. How could this be any worse?'

I smiled. 'Thanks buddy, that really helps,' I said.

'Sorry,' Will said. 'So what is it?'

'I'm supposed to give somebody a massage on Friday night,' I explained finally. I exhaled long and slow.

I could hear Will breathing rhythmically through the phone.

'Um, Will, are you there?' I asked, knowing he was.

'Yeah, yeah, I'm there. Um... TJ, why is this a big deal? So you're giving a massage. How did this happen?'

I thought for a moment before answering. 'It's for Joey's cousin. He's in college,' I said, as if this provided all the information Will needed to understand the mess I'd created.

'Joey who? Joey Collucci?'

'Yup. Joey's cousin is like the quarterback at Loyola I think.'

'Okay, that's good. So why are you giving him a massage? How did you meet him?'

'Um, well, you know, well, I don't know, I just did.'


'Well, I don't know! Shit! You know I've gotten to be, you know, pretty tight with Joey...' I paused, waiting for Will to respond, wondering if he was mad that I had another friend beside Will, And it was the quarterback on our high school football team to boot. Will was way too sure of himself; no way would something like Joey make Will jealous.

'Yeah, I think that's awesome,' Will said. 'Joey's a pretty cool guy, I hear.'

'Yeah, he is.' If Will only knew how Joey and I had become such good buds. That Joey and I were fucking! But he didn't, and I wasn't ready to tell Will about Joey. I hadn't even told Andy about Joey. God knows who Joey was telling! Ugh.

'So what's the deal with this massage thing then?'

'So, I don't know, I guess I got into giving Joey massages after practice sometimes.'

'You did?' Will's voice was even, but I could tell he was trying to figure out where this I was heading with all this.

'Um, well yeah, we made a deal. I gave him massages and he taught me football.'

'He taught you football?! Why did he teach you football? You don't play football TJ.'

'I know, I know,' I said, lamely.

'You run, TJ. You're too skinny,' Will said, reminding me that my status relative to the biggest stud on campus was pretty pathetic.

'Well, you're right. It's not likely I'll go out for football in college. Unless I get into a college of dwarfs with no muscle mass whatsoever.'

Will laughed. 'So you're pretty good at massage then? You've never given me one.' It was an innocent comment.

'Um. Well I don't know. Maybe.'

'I mean if Joey Collucci's cousin who goes to college wants to get a massage from you, then you must be pretty good, right?'

'It's pretty easy I guess. You just put some greasy oil on your hands and then, well you just rub,' I explained, not meaning to make it sound sexual at all.

'And you've never offered me one why?' Will said again.

'It's just that,' I started, not knowing what to say next.

'It's just that you thought I might get hard when you rubbed me?'


'Okay, just kidding. I guess that's why you're calling me in the first place, right?'

'Yeah, I mean, yeah. I don't know. It's weird. At first, I didn't mind doing it for Joey, but this thing with his cousin, you know, it's just different. Joey was, you know, really nice about it. He was usually pretty wiped out after practice and he needed to just, you know, relax I guess,' I tilted my neck back and looked at the ceiling in my room where my Grease poster looked down on me unapprovingly. 'I'm not sure I really helped him that much, but you know, Joey and I became good friends through the whole thing,' I explained in my best matter of fact tone.


'So anyway, Joey's cousin stopped by the other day when I was over there at Joey's place. And well, Joey was going on and on about how great I was at rubbing his muscles and well, I don't know, Tino just like invited himself over to my house for a massage.'

'Wow,' Will said sounding disinterested.

'No really, I don't even know this guy Will. Now all of a sudden he's coming over to my house. And you know, I'm supposed to, you know, well, I don't know.....what the fuck am I supposed to do?'


'Will! Come on! Can you like come over this Friday?'

'And do what? Help you rub oil all over his butt?'

'No,' I giggled. 'You know, just be there, just in case.'

'Just in case? Just in case he's lying there buck-ass naked and wants to start talking football? I'll just chime in with my superior macho knowledge of the sport.'

I laughed again. 'Will! I can talk football! After all, I did it with Joey all those times.'

'Right, I'm sure you did.' Will sounded doubtful.

'Will, can you please just do this for me? Just, you know, in case he tries something.'

'Tries what?' Will asked.

Will was gonna make me say it.

'In case he tries to have sex with me!' I


Will was silent on the other end of the line.


'TJ, I'm here. I don't get it. Why do you think he's gay? I mean, he's a football player. Why would you think something like that?'

'I just got a feeling,' I said.

'Mmm,' Will said. 'So, you think he knows about your penis?' Will asked, baiting me.

'No! What the hell, Will? He doesn't know about

my fucking dick!'

'Perhaps you're right. But that's only because he doesn't go to high school with us,' Will said evenly. 'Everybody else does. Even Joey Collucci I'll bet!'

The color drained from my head.

'Will, everybody at Apple Valley does not know a damn thing about my dick. I do not talk about my penis. Nobody talks about my penis. Only you talk about my penis. I certainly didn't mention it the other night when I met Tino.'

'TJ, everyone I know has heard about your dick. It's like we were talking about that time at lunch, you're proud of having an eight inch penis, so you know, word has gotten around.'

'Eight and a third!' I quickly corrected him before I could catch myself.

'See? There you go, eight and a third! You're proud of it.'

'All right, so maybe it's been discussed in a few stupid hallway conversations. Big deal, right? Are you gonna help me out this week or what?'

'Okay, okay. So I'll check in with Peggy,' he said. Then Will changed the tone of his voice. 'So Peggy, you see it's about TJ. Yes, well, I know, seems he's committed himself to giving some college football player a massage and wee little TJ is scared to death the big stud is gonna want to fuck him silly.'

'Very funny Will.'

Will was laughing on the other end of the line.

'Will, you know I wouldn't ask for your help unless it was serious, right man?'

He paused before answering. 'Okay, don't worry about it. I'll think of something to tell her. Maybe we can, you know, meet up at your place and go to a late movie or something. I don't know though. There's something going on with her too anyhow.'

I paid no attention to Will's final sentence. 'Um, good, thanks. Okay, see you then. Great,' I said. It wasn't until I'd hung up that Will's comment about Peggy being funny lately registered with me. I shelved the thought and figured I'd ask him about it later.

By Friday night I was still totally freaked out. But at least Will was going to stop by so if anything strange with Tino happened, I had him there.

What exactly Will was going to do to help me, I had no idea.

There's no question Tino was hot. Maybe too hot. Smoking Roman hot!

He sort of had Joey's swarthy Italian looks but maybe just a little softer features and a little lighter skin. Joey's body was cut like a statue out of some museum or something, and his butt...well, Joey's butt was just fucking amazing! Tight and firm and juicy in all the right spots.

So why on earth was I at all worried about rubbing down Joey's cousin? I don't know! I thought about calling Will to tell him not to bother coming over when the phone in my room rang.

It was Tino. I stopped breathing. He wasn't going to be able to make it because the coach was asking him to look at some films or something.

This took a moment to sink into my head.

I told Tino not to worry about it, that I had all sort of other plans anyway (which was, of course, not true). Tino apologized and it sounded like he was really disappointed. He asked for a rain check.

'Um, well, yeah, that's be great,' I managed to say. What an idiot I was being.

When I hung up the phone, I was strangely a little disappointed. No Tino. No massage. I rubbed the outside of my jeans in the general vicinity of my balls, and then I lay down on my bed and stared at the ceiling. Olivia Newton-John stared blankly back at me. What would Sandy do in a situation like this?

After a few minutes, my hands wandered again down to my jeans. I started thinking about Tino. He had gorgeous brown eyes and a perfect nose. I hadn't seen him without clothes on but I could imagine just fine.

My dick got hard and I pawed at myself through the thick blue fabric. I thought about Tino's strong back, and my inexperienced hands rubbing my mom's hand lotion all over him. I opened up the button and slid my hand inside.

My cock was a rock. My own pet rock, I smiled to myself.

I had the hand lotion on my dresser so I grabbed it. It smelled like cucumbers. Why did my mom have a lotion that made her hands smell like cucumbers? When did lemons go out of fashion?

I squirted some of the liquid onto my palm and then realized I'd need both hands to get my pants and underwear down. I looked for a place to put the lotion.

I pulled up my t-shirt and rubbed the blob of greenish cream on my belly button. That freed up both hands and I shoved my pants and shorts to just below my knees. I lay back down and looked down at myself.

I was thin, Will was right. I'd been running on the cross country team since I'd started high school so my legs were pretty toned. I had the beginnings of a six-pack, but nobody would probably call it that. Maybe if I did more sit-ups. I hated sit-ups.

My dick itself I'd always liked. After all, if you don't love your own dick, how are you gonna get somebody else to love it for you? That was pretty stupid. But I really did love my dick. It was plenty long and generously thick. Nothing like Joey's beer can cock, but it seemed proportioned just right. I had a little dark red circle around the end where it got really sensitive. My balls seemed about average. After all the guys I'd been fooling around with lately I had seen plenty to know how I compared in that department.

I slimed some lotion onto Mr. Happy. First I dabbed some on the end in an artsy sort of way and then made a line of lotion dots down the side. I regarded my work and smiled. What a dimwit, just yank it already!

The doorbell rang.

I jumped out of my skin.

I looked around for a towel but hadn't remembered to bring one into my room. I had cucumber hand lotion on my hand and on my cock.

What to do?

The doorbell rang again. Shit!

I pulled my pants up and fell over onto the floor trying not to touch anything with my greasy hand. Finally I gave up and smeared the cream onto my pants on the back pocket. I decided that was probably safe so long as I didn't sit down.

Dangling my cucumber hand in the air like it was on fire, I scrambled down the stairs and looked through the peep hole.

It was Will!

I opened the door.

'What's up?' I said, hoping my hard-on was well-concealed in my jeans.

'Hey, that took a while, where were you?'

I looked at my crotch and it seemed all right.

'In the bathroom,' I said. 'Sorry.'

'No biggie,' Will said. 'So can I come in?'

'Um, yeah, well sure.' I opened the door wider and let Will in. 'Is everything okay? I thought you and Peggy were supposed to...'

'We were,' Will interrupted. 'She broke up with me.' He looked really awful and his eyes like he'd been crying or something.

'What? Are you kidding?'

'I'm not kidding, TJ.' Will exhaled through pursed lips and sat back on the couch. 'She fucking broke up with me!'

'And Tino cancelled on me,' I said, hoping that this piece of insignificant information could somehow put Will's breakup in perspective.

'What?' he said, truly not knowing what I was talking about.

'Tino?' I said, 'Do you remember? Joey's cousin Tino? He said he couldn't make it.'

The realization slowly came over my friend. 'Oh...yeah, right...um, well that's too bad I guess.'

'Will, forget about Tino, it's no big deal, I'm sort of glad,' I said.

'What?' Will looked like he was in a fog. 'Okay, well that's good he cancelled then, right?'

'Will, TJ to Will. Come in Will. Earth to my buddy,' I said smacking him lightly on the side of the head.

He sort of slouched over and looked at me, for the first time ever from below my eye level.

I didn't know what to do so I wrapped my arms around him and gave him a hug. He held on tight.

I suddenly remembered an episode of Oprah where she said that you should never end a hug before the other person does. So I held on to Will for a while longer.

It felt like an eternity until Will felt strong enough and pushed himself away. His eyes were glassy.

I looked at him and I was sad. 'Will, I'm really sorry man, what happened?'

He didn't answer right away. He backed up and sat down on the couch. He put both fists over his eyes. I listened to the wall clock tick-tocking while Will just sat there.

'Did she, I mean, did she say she's seeing someone else or something?' I asked. Peggy was probably the type to jump from guy to guy.

'Yeah, yeah, she said there's this guy on the football team.'

'Fuck! I fucking knew it! A football player!'

'I know, they're such idiots,' Will said, removing his hands from his face. His eyes were even redder than before. 'Total muscle-heads.'

I giggled at the word. 'Yeah! Muscle-heads.

Did she say who it was?'

'No, I didn't ask. I don't really care,' Will said, his voice breaking.

'I can't believe it Will. You two were like so close. I thought maybe you'd be together forever or something. Did you ever, you know, get any idea this could ever happen?'


'Did she, you know, ever stand you up or something?'

Will chuckled now. 'Nope,' he said. 'We were actually having sex this afternoon when she just like froze up and said, ''I can't do this anymore.''

'You're kidding? She told you while you were humping?'

Will laughed even harder. 'Did you really just say ''humping?' Where do you get words like that? AP English?'

'Fuck you. Yes, Mrs. Redman told us to be imaginative when we write about screwing earlier this week,' I joked.

'I'll bet,' Will said. He was finally smiling.

'I don't know where I picked it up. Humping is maybe not the best term for it I admit. If you weren't...fucking, humping, whatever, what were you doing?'

'She was smoking me.'

Now I laughed. 'She was what?'

'She was smoking me. You know, sucking my joint. Praying to the pubic gods. Giving me head.'

'Till you were dead,' I added helpfully.

'Yup. And she's pretty good at it too.'

'So, did you like come in her mouth or something and that set her over the edge?'

'Nope. We didn't get that far.'

'So how could someone be...praying to your pubic god... or whatever and then just decide to break up with you? I don't get it.'

Will sniffed.

'Beats me.'

'Hmm. Sounds like another double entendre.'

'A double what?'

'Never mind.' I looked away, thinking to myself.

'What?' Will said.

'I don't know. I'm just shocked I guess,' I said.

'Yeah, me too. There I was with my penis hard as a bone and she's got, like pre-cum, all over her face, and then well, she just stops. She wipes her mouth and looks up at me and says that she's seeing somebody else.'

I whistled.

'Just like that?'

'If I wasn't so fucking horned out right now, I'd probably really be upset about it,' Will said.

I had no response for this. The little wheels inside my head began to spin.

'Hey, can I use your bathroom for a sec?'

'Um, sure, you know where it is.'

I sunk deeper into the cushions of the couch in our living room. We never really sat here, only when company came over. Everything in this room was so clean.

Shit! The cucumber lotion! I was getting it all over my mom's good furniture!

I sprang up and stood over the spot. It was there all right. A whitish, greenish glop of gooey grease right where my butt had been. My folks would kill me! I ran into the kitchen to get something. I was bringing the towel over to the couch to wipe up my mess when I heard Will's voice from the bathroom.

'Hey, what happened to your massage dude?' he shouted.

'He cancelled. I told you that already.'


Will walked back into the room. He was still tucking his shirt in.

'So you're not going to be taken advantage of by a college boy tonight? I don't need to protect you?'

'Um, no, not tonight. I'm good.'

I went back to scrubbing the cushion.

Will stared at me.

'What are you doing?' he asked.

'Nothing,' I lied.

'TJ, what's with you? It's like you're not yourself anymore. You've got a wet rag and a bottle of Mr. Clean, Will pointed to the white bottle in my hand.

I shrugged.

'Doesn't look like much of a big secret, so what's the big deal? It's not like I asked you some deep, dark secret. What the hell are you doing?'

I stopped and gave him my best puppy dog face. I looked down at stuff in my hands. I tossed them onto the couch and sank onto the floor.

'You're right. I'm sorry. I've been a terrible friend lately,' I said pouting.

Will frowned.

'There's, there's really nothing I'm trying to hide,' I said, then paused. ' It's just that, well...it's stupid.'

'Come on, TJ, we tell each other everything. We're best friends man.' Will sat down again on the couch and put his feet up on my mom's coffee table. I liked how Will placed the emphasis on the word ''best.'

'It's really stupid man. I was about to clean up the couch cause I got some of my mom's hand lotion on it.'


'Jesus Will, I was sort of jerking off when you rang the doorbell and well, I didn't have anywhere to stick the lotion all of a sudden like that, so, you know, I wiped it on the back of my pants, and then I forgot. And now it's, well, it's all over my mom's good couch.' I pointed to the grease spot that was still looking rather mean and nasty to me.

Will started to laugh really hard at my explanation.

'What?' I said, not getting the joke. But Will kept on laughing and laughing and I just stood there until I caught what he had and started to laugh myself. Will doubled over and pulled his knees up to his chest. I was laughing so hysterically that I fell onto the couch and landed with my butt on the pillows again. When I rolled away and saw that I'd made another grease spot. We both looked at it.

We found this incredibly funny and laughed all the more.

Will pointed at the Mr. Clean I had dropped on the floor and busted up all over again. 'Mr. Clean? On the couch?'

We both fell off the couch we were laughing so much and we wound up flat on our backs staring at the ceiling when we both finally able to stop.

It was Will that managed to speak first.

'So I guess we both haven't gotten off yet today,' he said.

I stopped breathing. I looked over at him but I couldn't see his face. I said nothing but I took a deep breath and let it out very slowly.



'TJ, you didn't come did you? I mean, I interrupted you wanking your monkey, right?'

I smiled. 'Yes, you interrupted me.'

I wanted to teleport myself out of the living room. Where was Captain Kirk when you needed him?

'Wanking your monkey?'

I giggled. 'Yes, wanking my monkey.'

'So, let's do it. I'm so fucking horny I could fuck...I don't know, Mrs. Redman!'

'Oh my god, gross! You could never get even within ten feet of that fat cow!' I screamed quietly.

'Well, you're probably right, not Redman, but, well I don't know, I just gotta get off!

'So, I happened to know where you can get some great cucumber hand lotion.' I looked at him to try and gauge how serious he was. 'Cheap,' I added

'Bring it on dude!'

I put my hand over my ears and bent my neck to look at the floor. I was considering what the right thing to do was.

'TJ, go get the fucking lotion. Let's jerk off. Let's have a....what do they call them?'

'A circle jerk,' I answered quickly.

'Yeah, a circle jerk. Let's have a circle jerk!'

'Are you sure about this?'

Will stood and unzipped his pants. I watched him step out of them and throw them on my mom's good couch. His boxers were baby blue with navy sailboats. His strong legs were a little more hairy than mine.

'Will, man, we can't do this on my mom's couch,' I said nodding my head toward the mess I was making worse. ' I'm already gonna have to do the dishes for the rest of my life just for this little stain I made.'

'Stains,' he pointed out.

I smiled weakly. Will looked around for a better spot to have our circle jerk.

He flipped off his boxers and kicked them with one leg so that they spiraled in the air and landed in his right hand.

'Your room then. Grab the cucumber stuff.'

I followed Will up the stairs. I watched his ass flex and extend on each step and felt my own jeans get tighter. Much tighter.

When we got to my room, Will put his hand on the light switch and stopped. He craned his neck around to look at me.

'Lights? No lights?'

I thought about this. 'Um, lights,' I said. 'I want to make sure it's my own monkey I'm wanking.'

'Um, TJ, I think I could tell if you were wanking mine,' Will said grinning broadly with his perfect teeth.

I laughed at his joke.

He flipped the switch on and hopped onto my bed.

I hadn't done a good job making it so Will landed sort of half on my bedspread and half on my sheets.

I stayed in the doorway and looked at Will. His dick was not hard but it lay against his thigh like a leftover hot dog bun. There was a bend in the middle as part of it was forced by its sheer weight and gravity to go lower. I sighed.

'TJ, chill out. Get your pants off and get over here and let's have a circle jerk.'

I felt myself get fully hard and I tugged at the front of my jeans to give myself a little more room. Will's balls were touching the bottom sheet on my bed.

'I see you shaved your balls again,' I said, stupidly.

Will put his hand down to cup them and his dick fell of his thigh.

'Yeah. Peggy liked it, so I kept up. You?'

I stared at Will's scrotum. I thought of a brown horse I ridden on once back at summer camp.

'Me? Um, well, yeah, I do, I mean, yeah, I shave them every once in a while,' I walked over to the bed and took my socks off. It seemed like the right place to start.

'It feels weird sometimes, but I have to say, Andy was right, somehow it's sort of a turn-on! Don't you think?'

'Yeah, it is. You're right,' I said monotone.

Will held his hand out, palm up.

'What?' I asked, looking at his outstretched paw.

'Cucumber me.'

I smiled and squirted a small pile of the smelly hand lotion into Will's palm.

The room was suddenly filled with the scent of salad. Will lathered up his growing cock and I put the bottle on the bed where it could be between us. I undid my pants and pulled my shorts down along with them to my ankles. I was already at full mast and Will looked at it. He smiled.

'Way to go, TJ,' he smiled. 'Zero to eight and a third in less than ten seconds.'

I looked at my boner and smiled. There was already a little bit of pre-cum leaking out.

'Yup,' I said. 'I seem to have no problem with that these days. Usually not even three seconds!'

Will didn't seem to hear me. He had both hands around his own hard-on and was stroking it up and down like he was greasing up a barbershop light.

My own dick throbbed.

'Are you gonna sit down, TJ?'

'Um...' Will was completely erect now and seeing his gigantic penis up so close made me a little light-headed. I sat down beside him, my eyes glued to his mid-section. I was ridiculously close to coming and I hadn't even touched myself.

'Here, do you want some of this lotion? You gave me too much.'

'Um, sure,' I said.

Before I could react, Will grabbed my cock with both hands and wiped off the excess lotion on me.

I yelped. I pushed Will's hands away.

'Careful!' I said. 'I'm like totally close dude.'

'TJ, come on. Nobody can cum that fast.'

'Well, yes, it's a problem,' I admitted. 'Don't put your hands anywhere near it,' I warned.

Will's much bigger arms shoved mine to the side and he grabbed my dick again and pumped it a few times. I yelped again, even louder

'Will! Fuck! Cut it out!'

Before I could get the last syllable out I shot a massive load of sperm all the way up to my shoulder.

Will looked at me and laughed.

I gingerly unfurled Will's huge fingers from around my hard-on.

'There! Are you satisfied?' I asked. 'I'm done, done, done,' I added.

'TJ, that's got to be a world record,' he said.

He put his hands back on his own erect cock.

I was in a very funny state of mind. Sort of in that post-orgasmic relief state, part of me still extremely turned on to have my best friend in my bed with his dick of death staring me in the face.

Still another part of me was even a bit horrified that I had cum so fast and had a huge squirt of come on my shirt. Once again I had no towel. I looked at Will.

'Don't look at me TJ,' he said. There's no way I can cum that quickly.' Will was still using both hands to move the skin of his dick up and down. As he did his balls lifted just slightly off my bed sheets.

I felt my mouth fill with saliva and closed my lips so I wouldn't drool or anything.

I had no idea what he was talking about. I took off my shirt and dabbed at the cum on my half-hard pecker.

I looked up at the poster on my ceiling and sighed again. Don't give me that look Sandy.

The sound of Will's hands rubbing himself filled me with an amazing sense of comfort. I settled into my bed and closed my eyes. I tried to imagine what it might be like to hold Will's huge fire pole in my hands, to lick it up and down, to ride it like a carousel pony. Naw, impossible.

No fucking way.

To say that Will's penis was on the large side was to say that Dolly Parton's breasts (the original ones at least) were on the large side.

The word ''large' just didn't do my best friend's man-meat justice, it was gigantincredible. Ginormous!

Our friend Andy, who apparently was no slouch in the ''I've seen lots of other guys in the locker room' department, called Will's dick ''scary big.'

Was there anything wrong with my friend? At all? I mean, he was perfect in every way. Nice. Smart. Handsome as fuck. Cut. And the guy never did anything to stay in shape. And then his dick!

With just a few tugs from Will's big hands, I had just come. Prematurely. And buckets, by the way. Still, what a total embarrassment!

Just like Andy, my own hard-on was certainly no slouch in the ''I've seen lots of other guys in the locker room' department either. My eight and a third inches were no match for Will. How could Peggy possibly have had this thing in her mouth?

I looked over at him trying to get into a comfortable position to finish jerking off. Will had way above average clean-cut boy-next-door looks and straight dark brown hair. His chest hair had started to come in, way before mine, and I could just see a hair or two peeking out from the collar of Will's white t-shirt.

Down below the bottom of Will's shirt - where my eyes were naturally drawn - Will's male tower. It was thickest at the base, more fire extinguisher than human appendage. It lifted mightily up toward Will's neck and tapered just a bit to a thinner (think shaving cream can) up near the top. The thing had no curves at all. The head of Will's dick head was lightly cream colored with a perfect red circle that made it look happy - it didn't really cap off the Saturn 5 rocket of Will's cock the way I thought it should. Somehow a monster penis like this one deserved something more worthy of its greatness.

I sighed and exhaled very, very slowly. Did they write poetry about dicks?

Will used one hand to hold his balls away from his cock (probably so they wouldn't keep getting smacked down by the massive tool, I laughed to myself), and he used the other hand in a vain attempt to encircle his erection and stroke it up and down.

I looked at his face, his eyes were closed. I loved Will's simple face. It was clean and handsome and strong and interesting all at the same time. I had lusted after him since maybe three seconds after we met.

For the first couple years we were friends, I had never even seen Will naked.

So now here I was. My own rigid member had not yet gone soft despite the humiliation of an uber-fast ejaculation. And Will's rigid member was now staring me right in the face as Will expertly tugged away on it. I felt a tiny bit of drool pool between my lips and I slurped it back in quickly.

Will was lost in his own world. Trying to cum.

Unsure of what else to do, I thought the situation deserved a little conversation.

'So, how do you like the cucumber?'

Will slowed the pace of his hand to a crawl and opened his eyes. 'What?'

I cleared my throat. 'I mean, how do you like this flavor of hand lotion?'

Will smiled. He looked down at the wingless 747 between his legs. He spoke directly to it: 'I don't know, buddy, how do you like TJ's mom's cucumber hand lotion?'

I looked at his dick and waited for an answer.

As Will's hand moved toward the top of his cock, the little pee hole at the end seemed to open up, but no sound came out. Will looked at me: 'I think he likes it. Do you have more, I think I need a few more minutes.'

'Um, okay,' I said, reaching for the bottle on the floor.

Will put out his hand to take it but I didn't hand it to him. A crazy idea crystallized in my brain.

I nodded at the rocket ship. 'Um, do you want me to, you know, um, put some on?'

Will paused and seemed to be thinking about this.

'Sure,' he said, taking his hand off and holding his palm upward. 'Go for it!' he said excitedly.

I was of course only too eager to make myself of use.

I squirted a tiny dot of lotion onto the head of Will's penis. It looked pretty silly just sitting there surrounded by all that beige bigness.

Will looked up at me. 'TJ, can you spare it?'

'Um, sorry, yeah, here you go.' I squeezed the bottle hard and a long stream of light green cream made an impressive line up and down the length of Will's shaft. 'That should do it,' I said, satisfied that this industrial-sized squirt of lube would be enough to lather up the entire thing.

Will looked at me again. 'So?'

I swallowed. 'So?'

'So, do it!' Will said. 'Rub it in. You came pretty quick when I touched yours. Maybe that'll do the trick for me.'

'Really?' I said, instantly regretting that I sounded like a school-boy being given a couple bucks for the candy store.

'Really,' Will said evenly.

I looked at Will's dick again and considered the big boner before me. This would definitely require two hands.

'Okay, I said, keep pulling down on your balls,' trying to sound authoritative. 'I'll take the top part.'

Will giggled.

And that's all there was too it. In an instant I was holding my best friend's dick in my hands. What could be simpler?

I'd held a few lately so the sensation was not totally weird, but somehow Will's hard cock just felt different. Better. Bigger for sure. Yes, way bigger. And it was really, really thick.

No way could my hands fit around it. I smiled and silently tested how far my hands could go up on this tower of Pisa until my fingertips finally met up with my palms. I'd had to move my hands almost all the way to the end.

Wow! Will had his eyes closed so I took a moment to study it more closely. This was pretty fucking awesome! I stroked my hands up and down on it a few times and Will seemed to relax and settle back against the wall. His grip on his scrotum eased up and I reminded him gently that the two of us were working together on this project by putting my hand on his gently. Will smiled.

'Oops, sorry,' he said. 'I sort of forgot.'

'Don't let it happen again,' I teased.

Will giggled again.

'TJ, it just feels so fuckin' good!'

'Good,' I said, pleased to be able to be of use. I exhaled, shut up, and focused on the task at hand.

After a minute or so, Will's hips started to wriggle a little bit.

'Mmm,' he said. I took this as a good sign that he was enjoying it, but I wasn't quite ready for it to end. I eased up the pressure and spent a little more time away from the end since I'd already figured out that was Will's most sensitive part. I didn't want him to come so quickly. Will seemed to figure out that I'd eased off and he opened his eyes.

'TJ, cut it out, let's do this already,' he urged me.

'You're good, don't worry, you'll get there,' I said. Just to satisfy him that I didn't intend for this to drag on until morning, I let one hand linger way up near the top and then I flattened my palm and rubbed around it. Will shuddered.

'Yow,' he said.

'Yow what?'

'Just yow! Take it easy up there, I guess that's a little sensitive.'

'Um hmm,' I said. I removed my palm from the tip. I added more lotion from the bottle.

I held the base of Will's cock as much as I could and moved my other hand slowly up the entire length and then I avoided touching the very top. Will relaxed again and a smile crossed his face.

After a minute or so, Will's stomach tightened and he arched his back so I slowed down my pace.


I ignored him. I had him now. Certainly I was no expert at getting other guys off but I had learned a thing or two during my senior year adventures. I watched Will's hips move rhythmically with my hand and when I changed the speed, so went his hips. Every once in a while I would grab the end and Will would hang in there as long as he could before he cracked up and pulled away.

I looked down at my own dick. It had long since risen to its full eight or so inches. But it looked sort of small and inadequate when I compared it against Will's. I could see the pre-cum glistening on the tip of my dick and I hadn't even touched it! Cool! I wondered if I could come while just jacking off Will.

Will was on a different planet. I had him so close quite a few times but I wouldn't let him go over the edge. As soon as he'd start bucking like he was just about to shoot, I'd slow down and lay off the end of his cock. He let me do this to him a few times before he finally decided to say something.

'Come on TJ, stop fucking around. I've gotta get off.'

'I know, I know. You will.'

'Now TJ, if you don't finish me, I will.'

I just ignored him and brought Will back up to the peak again before backing off.


'Will, calm down, this is good, right?'

He opened his eyes and looked at my hands on his cock. He nodded.

'Okay, then, shut up. You are definitely going to cum tonight. Just let me do this.' He closed his eyes again and seemed to relax as I worked his cock up and down. 'I'm a professional,' I said, stupidly.

Will didn't seem to hear me. He was in some zone lost all over again.

After a few more peaks and valleys, I decided to let him blow his load.

My own cock was dangerously close to coming again anyhow and I thought that if I shot all over Will's legs that might ruin the moment. Will was not in control of his own body. I was. He was no longer speaking intelligibly so this was really much more my decision than his. I had brought my best friend to a special pre-orgasmic place that I'm sure he had never been before.

We had plenty of lube to work with but wanted a little something extra so I spit into one palm and then went back to Will's meaty manhood.

My best friends penis was so big and thick that I felt like I was trying to make my own thigh come!

I quickened my stroking and played around with the tip of Will's cock as much as I wanted. A non-human sound came out of Will's mouth.

Then, in a flash, Will's hips lifted completely off the bed and he arched his back and bent his knees all at once. It was all I could do to hang on for the ride. I had to stand up to keep up. So this was what riding a bucking bronco must be like, I thought to myself.

'Aaaaaahhh!' Will said.

Then he came. The first stream of white jizz made a rushing sound as it left Will's dick and smacked Will right under the chin. I felt his penis harden up even more and I twisted my hands around to give him some room. At the same time, I tugged his balls downward into my bed.

'Aaaaaaahhh!' Will said again. I grinned.

The second stream made a line across the top of Will's chest that separated Will neatly into top and bottom sections.

'I'm coming,' Will said, then, as if I hadn't noticed already.

'Yes you are,' I said, certain that he wouldn't be able to hear me.

His dick throbbed and another glob came out and formed a new pile just below the separation line. I kept stroking and tugging away and Will was still on another planet when I shot my own load unassisted (my second of the evening, thank you very much) and whacked Will in the thigh with a few little streaks.

'Aaaahhh, shit!' Will said.

I took my hands off Will's cock and watched it bounce up and down on its own. A little more sperm came out and dribbled down the top. Will opened his eyes.

I thought it best to get a towel. Maybe two.

I headed off to the bathroom and left Will to inhale and exhale slowly and maybe his heart rate would slow a little. I hoped he wouldn't drown in his own semen. Is that possible?

In my bathroom, I grabbed two towels and squeezed my own dick dry with one.

When I got back to my room, Will was still lying there awkwardly, his hands and arms spread out away from his body facing up to my ceiling. He looked spent. Will's weenie hadn't gone down at all and a little river of clear fluid continued to flow out of the hole at the end. The come all over Will's front side had begun to create little tributary rivers.

I smiled. He was a mess! I handed him the dry towel, but he didn't take it. His arms didn't seem to work.

I stood there looking at my best friend laying on my bed with a hard-on, come all over the place. If only my cute ass friend Andy could see us now...

'Um, Will, do you want this? I mean, here's a towel.'

Will didn't move. His dick throbbed again.

'Will?' I tried again, 'are you okay?'


'I asked if you were okay? Are you?'

'Yes, I'm not sure I can talk yet. Gimme a minute, okay?'

I tossed the towel onto his chest hoping for it to land right on the huge glob before it dripped off of Will's body and coated my bed.

I dug around for my underwear and jeans and pulled them up over my hips. I looked at Will. He still hadn't moved, the towel was wear I had thrown it.

'So that was quite a fountain dude. Do you always come like that?' I asked.

Will looked at me and squinted one eye.


'Come! Do you always come like a water fountain?'

Will looked at his chest. Most of the evidence was covered with my bath towel. 'Um, well, I guess, I mean, no I don't think so.'

I laughed. 'Yeah. That seemed like a pretty intense one.'

'Yeah. Intense.' Will looked at me. 'How did you do that to me?'

I laughed again. 'How did I do that to you? How did you make me cum in like two seconds? That's certainly never happened to me before! Premature ejaculation only happens to older guys, right?'

'No kidding? That's not normal for you? To cum, you know, lickety split?'

'No, really. I usually take at least a minute and a half. My split never gets lickety,' I joked.

Will laughed again.

'Was that your first circle jerk?' Will asked, a few minutes later.

'Yep, was that your first?'

'Yep, except for one time in boy scout camp,' he said.

I was amazed. 'You did this in boy scout camp?!'

'Yep, with like eight other guys,' Will explained.

I was shocked, and more than a little intrigued. 'You, um, never mentioned that to me before,' I said, trying not to sound hurt that such an important secret had been withheld from me.

'I didn't think you'd want to know,' Will said matter-of-factly.

I thought about this.

'Um, well, you're right, I guess,' I said after I recovered.

I sat up on the bed and looked around the room for my pants.

'So, I guess I've become an old hand at this, right TJ?' Will asked. He was still lay on his back. His hard-on had become just semi-hard. It lay on his lower abdomen like an S-shaped anaconda.

I smiled at his pun. 'Yes, I guess you're now an old hand at circle jerks,' I said finally.

'Maybe it's time I moved on to something else,' Will said cryptically.

The breath froze in my throat before it could get out. I couldn't make a word.

'I mean,' Will added, 'seems like you and I and Andy can really have a blast together if we want, right? Sucking. Fucking. Whatever!'

I looked at my best friend and tried to swallow, but I couldn't.

Will went on: 'I mean, who needs women? They're way too much fucking work. I could be done with them for a while.'

I choked and coughed.


I scrambled up off the bed and picked up my pants. There was no way in hell Will was gonna poke me with that baseball bat, I thought to myself.

At least not today.


TJ Tachet

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