Am I gay?

by Voscche

22 Feb 2013 871 readers Score 9.5 (13 votes) PDF Mobi ePub Txt


The wedding would be held in the chapel at the Bellagio on the 11th and I arrived in LA 7 days early. I wanted to find out which prison Sean was in. I had doubts about it but I was determined to pay him a visit. I wanted to see him even if he had done some bad things. On the airplane the stewardess showed me to my seat. I had to sit in the middle of three seats. Left sat an elderly woman, if I had to guess I would have said she was about 60 to 65 years old. The first thought was grandma off of tweedy. On the right was a way to overweight African American man in his 30. He was already sweating when he sat down. The First thing he told us was "I'm suffering from Aviophobie". I looked at him because I didn't know what that was. "I'm scared of flying" he answered my unasked question. Minutes later I saw what he was talking about. As soon as we were on the airfield, ready to take off, he went white as a wall. And he grabbed the armrest on both sides so forcefully that I could see his knuckles turning white. And he was sweating like crazy. When we finally left the ground he moaned. I had never seen anyone panicking like he was. I wanted to do something but the only thing I could do was to hold of one of his hands. With his eyes closed he felt the touch of my hand and he squeezed the shit out of my fingers. And this is an 11 hour flight I thought. It's gonna be fun. After we reached flying level his grip loosened a bit but he still held my hand. I don't know but it seemed to comfort him a bit. I was ready to ask the flight attended for my sleeping pill so I pushed the button. When I turned to see how the old lady was, I saw her sitting in her seat, clenching her purse to her chest. Her eyes were looking at my hand holding the other guys hand. "Are you ok?" I asked. She looked up, right into my face and said" leave me alone you fagot". I was shocked. She said it with so much hate in her voice that I really couldn't react. When the stewardess came to ask what she could to for me, the old lady yelled at her. "I demand another seat; I don't wanna sit next to those fagots". The stewardess looked at her in surprise then at me. She saw me holding his hand. "He is scared of flying", I said she nodded her head. "I know he told me when he boarded the plane. Ma'am please it's not what it looks like", she addressed the lady. But with even more hate in the voice, grandma replied. "It won't take long before he is kissing that negga". That's it I thought. "how dare you, you old toad....." But the steward squeezed my shoulder. "Please sir". Other passengers were already gathering around us to see what was going on. Right behind me was a father with his wife I assumed and his son. The son was about 14 years old. He was smiling at me brightly. The next generation I thought. His dad had a disgusted look in his eyes. "I hate those fagots" he said and his son looked at him anxiously. More passengers were whispering. Around 5 min later the stewardess came back with a guy in a matching suite to her dress. "Good morning, my name is Manfred Zimmerman and I am the pilot today. My crew told me about the situation and I am very sorry but there are no available seats in the business class....." He started but the old hag cut him off. "I don't wanna sit next to black fagots and negga lovers". The pilot addressed her by looking into her eyes. "I am deeply sorry, and yes nobody should have to sit next to a person like this. So gentleman if you would please follow me to the first class. There are two seats for you. And I apologies for the rude behavior of one of our guest" and he looked the old bitch right in her eyes. She was bitching and screaming but the applause of most of the other fight guests quieted her down. The 14 year old applauded too and smiled at me but his dad stopped his son's behavior.

The pilot and I were helping the heavy guy out of his seat and to the first class. Brenda the stewardess had one more pill in her hand and gave it to my "friend". And finally after the last dose of medication he relaxed and started to speak. He told me that his name was Luis and that he worked as an attorney in a big law firm in El Paso, Texas. "I was in Germany because of one of our clients. His son is in jail for armed robbery and second degree murder." And they were trying to bring the son home to the states. "Since I speak fluent German, my dad was born in Munich; I was given the job". He said then he told me about his wife and that they were trying to have a baby and on and on and on. And while he was telling me all about himself, he still held my hand. Seeing him doing better I tried to remove my hand from his. He held on stronger, when he felt my attempt. "You know I feel saver when you hold my hand "he said and looked in my eyes. He had gray green eyes. Beautiful I thought. Well his face was handsome, only a little bit out of proportion. I guessed his height was about the same as me, and his weight at about 270 pounds. After I found out almost everything about his life, I told him about me. I started with the fact that I am gay. He looked at me with big eyes right into mine. I thought that he might let go of my hand after I told him about my sexual orientation, but nope. And after I finished with my last lover, Chris, with tears in my eyes, I felt his thumb stroking the back of my hand.

I had to empty my bladder and told him, so he would let go of my hand. "I have to go too" he said and together we went to the lavatory. There had been six toilets. All occupied, we had to wait in line. When one was available I let him go first and waited for the next chance. Right after he entered and locked his door, another door opened and out came the 14 year old. He smiled at me again. "Hi my name is Steven. How is your....friend?" He asked. I was about to tell him that he wasn't my friend but I just said "he doing better" and went inside the booth and it smelled like piss and cum. And I saw the steel mirror had stains of cum on it. That horny little boy jerked off in here I thought. I didn't give it a second thought because I'm not into kids. When I came out Luis was already waiting outside. On our way to our first class seats we walked by the boys seat. He smiled again at me and I gave him a nod in the direction of toilets. I know what u did in there I thought and he flushed.

Luis took my hand as soon as we sat down in our seats. "You know, I have dreams about same gender sex sometimes". He said and started petting my hand again. I looked at him. I never had a "fat guy. I imagined how that would be. "I had a client once, who killed his lover, because he thought, he cheated on him. It Turned out he had salsa dancing lessons to surprise my client. He's spending the rest of his life in prison now. He offered to give me a blow job. But freshly married back them I declined. And I wonder, what if I had said yes. I have started watching some gay porno once in a while, and I have to confess, it turns me on" he said, he almost whispered it. I looked at him. He had his eyes closed and I bet he was thinking of one right now. Checking his massive body, I couldn't tell if he had a boner or not. His belly was way over his belt and covert most of his private part. "How come you are not flying to Dallas, it would be a shorter flight?" I asked. "I have a seminar in LA, I have to go to, and so I'll stay there for a few days. Then I'll drive to El Paso. No more air planes if I can avoid it". He said and smiled.

He finally let go of my hand and fell asleep. I tried to do the same but a weird dream woke me up. I had sex with Luis in my dream and Sean showed up. Drunk, like the last time I saw him on the com. He yelled at me and he had a gun in his hand. But luckily some turbulence woke me And Luis up and the First thing he did was grab my hand again. "What are you up to in LA?" He asked. "I have been invited to a wedding in Las Vegas. How long you gonna stay in Los Angeles?" I asked out of curiosity. "Till the 10th why do you wanna pay me a visit"? He said with closed eyes. "Well" I started "maybe I can show you what you missed when you declined your clients offer". He opens his eyes and looked at me. "Really you would do that. I'm not exactly a dream guy". "I always keep an open mind and if sex is involved even more so" I said back and smiled at him. Now I looked down on his body and I could see a pole rising in his expensive pants. "Maybe not today, I'm being picked up, but I will call you if you give me your number". He gave me his number and I called it right away." Here is my number and if you didn't hear from me by, let's say, tomorrow you call me.

He almost broke my fingers when we landed in LAX but I didn't care.

Greg picked me up and that night I was drunk again. "Welcome party". All his friends were there except Jesus. He was the one I was looking for. Maybe he knew which prison Sean was in. When I was done with getting drunk I lay down and cried myself into a dreamless sleep.

Since I lost my old cellphone the accident I no longer had Sven's number. The next day I drove to the Goldman's house. There was a "for sell" sign in the front yard and the house seemed empty. I tried the bell anyway but no there was no answer. Dammit I thought how was I supposed to find Sven and his family and the jail, Sean was in.

That evening I called Luis, to ask him witch hotel he was staying in. " the LAX hotel " he said and gave me his room number. " I'll be there tomorrow at 5 pm" I said and hung up..

by Voscche

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