A Kick To The Heart

School was over, I walked through crowds of kids in the hallways to leave as soon as possible. Pushing people that were blocking my way. I look back for a second to see a kid getting into a heated argument with another one, but when I face forward I bump in to some guy. The boy turns to look at me... oh... it's Randy.'Whoops, sorry Carter.', he apologizes. Next to him I see none other than Dakota. Grinning and waving at me. 'Well, see you some other time', Randy says. Wow so much for being his best friend...

Now before you start calling me jealous, it's been weeks since Randy and I have had a conversation. So of course I have a right to be mad... don't I? I can't tell you how many times throughout these weeks I've checked my phone to see if he has messaged me or called... but nothing. He is with Dakota for the most part of his days. He can't take a minute to let his best friend know how he is doing?

I get angry at the thought of him finally being infront of me and him not saying more than ten words. 'Wait!', Dakota tells Randy. She mumbles something in his ear. 'Oh! I completely forgot!', I can hear Randy tell her. 'Hey Carter wait up!', he calls out to me. My stupid heart beats with joy even though I didn't want it to. He makes his way to me while shuffling through stuff inside his backpack. I wasn't sure whether to get glad or upset. 'Where there is a boom, there is a bam', I hear my grandmothers saying in my head. Well this is the boom. 'I forgot to give this to you, it's an invitation to my 18th birthday tonight, I've been busy with stuff, and completely forgot to give you one.', he told me. And that is the Bam. 'Oh, thanks.', I say trying not to rip the invitation into shreds. 'See ya', he says. 'Jerk', I mumble. I have seen many of kids in school with an invatation to Randys birthday, but you wanna know the funny part? I saw those

Invatations TWO WEEKS AGO. Two complete weeks. I'm considered his best friend, but his non-best friends get an invatation earlier than I do. there goes another Bam.

I examine the Invitation... wait... there's no name on it. I remember the kids that showed me their invatations to Randys party, they had 'For:' and their name. BAM, there goes another one. Oh, and he didn't remember himself. His girlfriend had to remind him about inviting me. BAM BAM BAM. I ran home trying to get this boiling feeling out of me. When I get home I see Angelo getting there at the same time as I am. 'Well look who-', he tries talking but stops when he sees me angry. I open the door and go inside. I see the furniture and the need of destroying things comes to me, so I go back outside. Outside I see Angelo setting up to work on what he needs to work on. I pace back and forth and think of a way to control myself. I suddenly get the Idea of destroying the invitation. I slam the small envelope on the ground and start stepping on it, spitting on it, and all the possible ways to kill an envelope. Angelo just stares waiting for me to calm down.

I sit on a chair on the porch and do a facepalm. 'Anything wrong?', Angelo asks. 'No. Nothing that matters.', I respond. I was on good terms with Angelo, but I still didn't trust him enough with my personal life. 'Is it Randy again?', he asks annoyed about my problems with Randy. 'Shut it! I'm not in the mood to hear your smart mouth right now!', I snapped. He kept quiet for a few minutes. I interrupted the silence with an apology, 'sorry... It's just that life isn't giving me a chance to breathe.', I say. 'It's alright, I understand how stressing things can be.', he says. I smile and start to walk inside when he calls out my name. 'Carter?', he shouts. 'Yes?', I say. 'Can I ask you something?', he asks. 'Sure', I tell him. 'But promise you wont go all nuts on me first?', he says. 'Uhh, okay?', I say confused. 'Do you still have a crush on me?', he asks confident. the question drops on me like a bag of bricks...

'Well, actually... not anymore', I say. 'Can I ask why?', he says. I look at him unsure of why he cares. 'You know Angelo, I'm getting the feeling that you want me to like you, is that it?', I ask. 'Of course not! it was just a simple question. Out of curiousity.', he says. 'Well, I stopped liking you because.... well... ummm...', I struggled to find an answer. He seemed to like that I was struggling to find an excuse. 'Well to be honest, your arrogance and selfishness, was what made me wake up and smell the coffee.', I say. 'What? I am not-', 'Oh please, even you knew it.', I Interrupted and laughed making a joke out of it. 'Anyways, it's good that you moved on, because Hannah wants to start dating me again.', he said. 'Wait, stalker girl?', I asked. He nodded his head. 'Didn't you tell her we were a couple?', I asked. 'Yeah, but I told her that we were having problems and that I'd give her one chance to make things right again.', he said. 'So what's

gonna happen to the two girls you dated before?', I ask. 'Oh... broke up with em' months ago.', he said like nothing. I couldn't help but chuckle at what a player he was. 'Well yeah, you can stop worrying about me being all up on you.', I assured him. He gave a simple nod. I turned to make my way back inside again and heard him let out a sigh of disappointment...

'Am I interrupting anything?', another voice called out. I looked to my right and saw my friendly neighbor. 'Hey Kim', I waved at her. 'Can I come over?', she said jumping the fence while asking. 'Well, you are here now.', I tell her. 'Shall we go inside?', I offered. She nods. 'Woah! Who the hell is that piece of heaven?', she asks referring to Angelo. 'His name is Angelo, hes my fr-... house worker.', I say avoiding the word friend. 'Well his name definetely suits him.', she says. 'Yeap.', I say. Kim gives me a long stare. 'What?', I ask. 'Dude, you just totally stared at your house worker with dreamy eyes.', she says. I hadn't even realized that I was staring at him. 'You have a crush on him?', she asks excitedly. 'What? No! I mean... maybe.. I mean... I dont know', I tell her. 'Okay Carter', she says rolling her eyes. 'Spill the story', she tell me. She knew me so well. I tell her the story about Randy and Angelo, and Dakota, and Hannah.

'Wow that's a lot of drama.', she says. 'I know.', I say letting out a sigh. 'You're going to the party right?, she asks. 'Of course not.', I tell her. 'You have too! Your best friend needs you.', she tries to convince me. 'Yeah, needs me so much he forgot to give me an invitation.', I snap. 'Look. If you wanna show them that you aren't weak. You need to go to that party and prove it.', she says. 'I don't-', 'You are going!', she interrupts. She runs upstairs to get my clothes ready. I follow. 'Lets get you fixed up, shall we?', she demands. I sigh and give a weak nod... here goes nothing.

After two hours of getting ready to go to the party (with Kims help), I run down to tell Angelo to tell my grandmother that I'll be out. 'Hey Angelo, can you tell my grandmother that I'll be out?', I ask fixing my shirt right. He looks at me speechless. 'I'm sorry, what?', he asks. I smile and blush as I realize that he was astonished by how I look. 'What are you smiling about?', he asks, angry that I probably noticed. 'Oh nothing, so can you tell her?', I ask. 'Sure', he says giving a real smile. It made me feel safe for some reason.

I make my way to Randys house and immediately hear the music from a mile away. I take a deep breath as I get closer, 'here goes nothing...', I enter and find his house packed with people. I start looking for Randy and find him in the center with most of the people giving their attention to him. He was laughing non stop with other friends as well as Dakota. 'Randy!', I call out. He doesn't hear me. He was a bit buzzed, I noticed by how he acted. I imagined his mother was probably gone for a while. He kissed Dakota like there was no tomorrow. I decided to talk to him when there was less people. I spotted Darren and decided to go with him. I kept my eyes glued to Randy most of the time. After what seemed like an hour, Randy whispered something in Dakota's ear and then grabbed her hand as they went upstairs. The people around them were whistling. ten minutes after I decide to finally talk to Randy. I tell the guys that I need to go to the restroom and make my way upstairs. As I try to go upstairs, I realized how hard it became to focus on the steps, which made me stumble into people. 'Holy shit, I'm drunk.', I tell myself. I shake my head trying to make the feeling disappear.

I make it upstairs and look for Randys room. It was pretty empty up here, besides a couple of people waiting for the restroom. I prepared what to tell Randy before I went into his room. I keep repeating the speech over and over... but get interrupted after hearing some sounds. I try investigating where they are coming from. I lean my ear against his bedroom door, the sounds grew louder. I opened the door just a crack... and found an unexpected surprise.

It turned out that the sounds I was hearing, were moans. There in Randys bed laid Dakota with legs over Randys shoulders. I had a full view of Randys back... his bones moving with every push and pull from Dakotas vagina. She moaned and put a hand over her own mouth to silence the sounds of pleasure... even though I couldn't see Randys face, I knew he was probably smiling from success.

I close the door and try processing what I see. I hold back any emotions that I feel right now. I take deep breaths to calm me down. I hear a door open, and look back to find Randy and Dakota going back downstairs, as happy as puppies. Randy catches a glimpse of me before he goes down. He gives a lazy drunken smile and waves, 'hey carter', he says. My anger gets the best of me and I storm off. Randy must have noticed my anger because the next thing I see, is him following me. I visualize Randy and Dakota having sex again, and this time, my stomach reacts differently. I run to the restroom and aim at the toilet, I throw up all the alcohol that I drank. 'You okay?', Randy asks with this drunk voice. 'Yeah', I tell him. 'You sure?', he asks once again. I remember my talks with Angelo and Kimberly. I had enough with these secrets! 'No.', I tell him. 'Well, what can I do for you?', he says rather lazily. 'You've done enough...', I say bowing my head in shame. 'What do you mean?', he says with curiousity. 'Randy... I have something to tell you...', I say starting to get nervous.

'Well what is it?', he asks. I take a deep breath. 'I saw you and Dakota... in your bedroom...', I tell him. His eyes go wide open and his face turns red. 'Wow... this is embarrassing...', he says avoiding eye contact. 'Well... I am 18 already... and I wanted to lose my virginity to someone special like Dakota.', he explained. 'Yes, I know. But that's not all I have to say...', I proceeded. 'These past few weeks I've been feeling something that I shouldn't...', I told him. 'Well, what is it?', he asked. 'After I tell you this, you may not wanna be friends anymore, and i'll completely underst-', 'Nonsense! You'll be my best friend no matter what happens!', he shouts. 'No! You don't get it Randy!', I yelled. 'No, I don't! So why don't you tell me already?!', he yelled frusturated. 'I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU!', I yelled out, echoeing from the walls of the restroom. 'Huh?', Randy cocked an eyebrow. I sighed, and speed walked downstairs, leaving Randy alone in the restroom.... I passed through crowds of people and left without a goodbye.

I wasn't the crying type, but at this point, I felt drops falling from the corners of my eyes. I got home, and to my surprise, Angelo was still there.

'What are you still doing here? Hasn't my grandmother let you go yet?', I asked lazily. 'Yes, but she called about staying late for work.', he said. 'Late for work? But it's a bakery shop.', I said. 'She said something about making cookies for some event.', Angelo explained. 'So I took the advantage to finish more work.', he continued. 'Oh... Okay... You're free to go any time you want.', I told him. I tried making my way inside, but quickly lost my balance and held on to Angelos shoulder. 'Woah, you sure you can go inside by yourself?', Angelo asked holding me by my waist. 'Yeah, no problem.', I said. I made another try at walking and this time fell back to Angelos chest. 'Alright, didn't wanna do this, but I have no choice.', Angelo sort of whined. He grabbed me by my waist once again, but this time, he carried me over his left shoulder. I layed there, too tired to complain.

Angelo sets me down in my restroom. 'Hey, Angelo... not sure if you know this but, I sleep on a bed..', I said pointing outside. 'I know, but you have to brush your teeth, your breath is stronger than the smell of nail polish.', he joked. I laughed but managed to brush my teeth. After I was done, Angelo grabbed me once again and carried me to my bed. 'You know, my bed was just feet away Angelo. I could have walked.', I said. 'Oh... right.', he blushed! I layed there and put my hand over my face... 'I really screwed things up with Randy.', I mumbled. Apparently, it was loud enough for Angelo to hear. 'Why? What happened?', he asked, very concerned. 'I confessed my love for him.', I blurted out like nothing. 'And he took it badly?', he asked. 'He didn't say anything.', I said. 'Well... he'd be doing a good choice on going out with you.', he said. 'What?', I responded shocked. 'Well you do have a pretty cool personality, I wouldn't blame anyone for liking you for your personality.', he said smiling. I smiled back and chuckled... his head came closer to mine. I shook my head, probably the alcohol... Nope, he came in closer. And before I knew it... we were kissing!

His lips were pressed on mine, I felt him breathing heavily as his chest pounded on mine. Our foreheads touching together. After a minute, Angelo broke the kiss... he looked at me with scared eyes, and just ran off, out of my room, out of my house... I didn't know what to think. I couldn't think, because before I could even think... I went sound asleep.