Brandon sat on a low wall outside the library. He had told himself he was going to study. Instead he found himself sitting outside, his thoughts all jumbled up, confused and he felt like things were out of his control. He watched other students walk by, especially the guys and after a while he realized he was openly checking them out, staring at them as they walked by, watching their asses in tight jeans or their muscular arms on those wearing muscle shirts or tank tops. He looked at their legs, the differences in shape and the way some were hairy, some just a light dusting of hair and some like his own, appearing to have none at all. His sense of himself was becoming more focused and his desires, his attractions were taking over. He knew his family would disown him, for the Jameson's were an old money family, old conservative money and none of this progressive liberal social engineering for some weird sinful diversity in society was going happen if they had anything to do with it. But what would they say now if they knew their youngest son was gay, a cock sucker, someone who let guys fuck him up the ass and he let his imagination run wild with scenarios of one bad scene after the next, all of them leaving him disowned, out on his own. He held his head down and felt like tears could form in his eyes any minute, with just the slightest provocation.
Eli had called him this morning and he had let it go to voicemail, unable to bring himself to answer it. He'd woken up at Eli's house yesterday morning, the small place in town he rented while in college, a place he could have a studio working on his art assignments and after he had willingly, admitting he wanted to do it, let Eli fuck him again before he had gotten up, showered off and left. He told Eli he'd call later, even though he doubted it. He could not believe, of all the guys at that fucking party, it was Eli, who had purple dyed hair, and he was so tall that he was nearly a foot taller. And he was so cocksure of himself, so open about his sexuality, his attraction to men Brandon didn't know what to think and he couldn't fathom being that comfortable with himself. He realized after nearly a day by himself, he was actually jealous, jealous of Eli being able to live as he chose, and not worried about how his family would react. Brandon realized he didn't really know Eli and wondered about his family, whether or not they knew he was gay and how they felt about it.
The cool fall air turned chillier still and the sun disappeared behind clouds that were moving in and Brandon looked up in time to see rain coming across the campus, moving toward him and he jumped up and ran, not to the library, but back to his dorm room. He had to talk to Eli, had to find out how he did it.
Brandon sat on the old sofa, some old leather thing, worn and soft to the touch, and he listened to Eli as he told him it was not so easy at first, but he had come out to his parents when he was fourteen and for a few days it was tense but his parents came to realize it was part of who he was and supported him. Eli admitted he liked to push boundaries, that he found it was part of being an artist, which is the way he wanted to live his life, and dying his hair purple or red, or his wearing certain costumes was just him expressing himself in a different manner. Brandon listened, trying to bring Eli's life in alignment with his own, but the pieces wouldn't fit, the backgrounds too different and he looked down at the khakis and blue dress shirt he now wore and then at the ripped jeans, the t-shirt Eli had dyed and painted and the boots, big black things that came up mid-calf and it was all the more apparent.
"Man, you just have to be willing to let go, just be yourself, for fuck's sake" Eli said to him as he leaned back waiting to see how Brandon would reply.
"I want to, but..." and Brandon hesitated, looked away from Eli, his eyes tearing up.
"Just do it, man; just fucking do it. Look at your clothes? Is that how you want to dress?"
Eli laughed and sat up, leaned toward Brandon, his expression getting serious. "I have an idea."
"Let me sketch you, be a model for me."
"Okay, but how is that going to...change anything?"
"You're going to take off your clothes."
Brandon laughed, thought Eli was joking, he couldn't possibly be serious, then he saw he was and he started shaking his head no.
Brandon had no reply to this.
Eli sat at his easel, a large pad of paper secured to it, sketching with pencils and charcoal, working meticulously, looking up often, studying Brandon as he sat naked. Brandon at first felt so self conscious, naked in every sense of the word but after several minutes, with Eli working at his drawing, the quiet between them somehow satisfying, he relaxed and he even forgot about his embarrassment of being naked around guys who were taller, more mature looking, for he was so lean, so smooth, soft even, that he knew he looked younger than his twenty-one.
The late afternoon turned into evening and after a long time Eli sat back and studied his drawing, nodding to himself.
"Well, can I see it?" Brandon asked.
"Yeah, come on over."
Brandon moved next to Eli and saw the sketch, a sketch of someone he wasn't sure he knew, a young man, completely exposed, and he found himself holding his breath as he took it in. He didn't know what to say, how to express to Eli how it made him feel to see something of himself that looked good, really good and he turned to see Eli looking at him, watching his expression and Brandon smiled and nodded his head yes.
"See, we all need art, a way to express ourselves and if you can't make it, you damn well can be it" Eli said as he reached up and rubbed Brandon's back, gently, intimately, slow strokes up and down. Brandon moved to Eli and hugged him, held him tight and he whispered in Eli's ear: "Thanks."
When Brandon pulled back Eli reached up and took his chin and held it still as he rose up and kissed him, one simply soft kiss, and he pulled back, just enough to look him in the eye and Brandon smiled at him, his features relaxed for the first time and he moved down and kissed Eli more passionately, urgently, pressing his body up against Eli, feeling the rough t-shirt and the worn soft jeans against his skin. Eli grabbed him by the ass, pulled him tight to his own body and Brandon felt his cock start to get hard, to push out against Eli and he ground it against him, let him feel what he was doing to him, openly, sexually and Eli ran the fingers of one hand down between his cheeks and touched him there, rubbed his fingers over his opening, felt the tightness of it and Brandon stretched his body back, pushing his ass against the finger at his hole and moaned. Eli pushed him back and stood, towering over him, and he took Brandon by the hand and led him down the hall to his bedroom.
Eli stood close to Brandon and let him pull his shirt up and off, tossing it on the dresser and Eli just stood there and watched as Brandon unbuckled his belt, pulled it open, unbuttoned his jeans and pulled the zipper down, slowly, like he was still afraid but when he had the jeans opened up he tugged the tight jeans down Eli's legs till they dropped to the floor. Brandon felt Eli's cock through his boxers, rubbed it, squeezed it till it got hard and pushed obscenely against the front and he pulled the boxers out and over Eli's cock and let them drop to his ankles on top of his jeans. Eli pushed Brandon toward the bed and as he followed he stepped out of his jeans and boxers, guiding Brandon till he was against the bed and Brandon eased down on his back as Eli followed him down, lying next to him.
Eli ran his hand through Brandon's hair, the soft blonde hair sliding through his fingers and he took a handful and pulled Brandon's head back as he leaned over and began to kiss and nip at his neck, tongue his ear and run his tongue over the soft smooth skin. Eli's other hand went down, over the lean smooth chest, over the soft stomach and down through the sparse hair and gripped the erection arched up hard. Eli stroked it, felt its smooth skin slide through his hand as he stroked the hard shaft. Brandon laid there, eyes closed, lost to the sensations coursing through his body, the way Eli was touching him, working him up and when he felt Eli's hard cock push against his hip, the wet head rubbing his skin, he wanted it, wanted it in him and he twisted his lower body, turned his ass toward Eli and let him scoot up to him, let him put his cock to his hole and rub it, up and down as Eli pumped his hips, worked his cock over Brandon's hole, smearing the slick wet pre-cum over it till he wanted Eli to put it in him, wanted to feel it fill his hole and he rocked his hips against Eli's cock as he wrapped one arm around Eli's head and pulled him to his mouth, tongues dueling, lips pressed together, breathing as one.
"Fuck me" Brandon whispered, his voice commanding.
Eli held him tight in his arm, squeezed their bodies together till it was hard for Brandon to breathe and Eli pushed with his hips hard and drove his cock into Brandon, and he penetrated him roughly, making him cry out. Eli kept pushing, working inch after inch of his hard cock into the tight hole, feeling it milk his cock, squeeze it as it passed through his opening, sinking into his depths.
"Relax into the pain, feel it release" Eli whispered in Brandon's ear and he felt the tense body in his arms relax and accept the last of his cock as it sank all the way into Brandon's hole.
Eli fucked Brandon slowly, worked his cock through his hole in slow full strokes, feeling how his hole at first gripped him tightly but now it loosened up, took him easily and he kept fucking as he held him in his arms, felt heat of his body against his own, the smooth soft body without blemish, with no tattoos, no piercings and Eli realized he was the first in a long time to be so innocent, so naïve about what it really meant to live, to be bold and daring, but there was something about Brandon, this innocence and he leaned into his neck, pumping his cock faster, his need to cum building, and he bit Brandon on the shoulder and felt him pull closer, accepting and Eli felt how Brandon was rocking his hips, trying to get more cock in his hole, wanting Eli in him as far as he could get. Brandon took his own cock and began to stroke it, the drooling cock quickly slick his hand and Eli shifted on the bed, moved his upper body back for a better angle at Brandon's ass and he began to fuck harder, faster, slamming his hips against Brandon's ass till the bed was rocking and Brandon was grunting and moaning, stroking his own cock as he rocked his hips down against the cock pumping back and forth through his hole.
"Fuck" Eli cried out and he shoved deep into Brandon, his exploding cock pumping out his load. He kept pumping it, thrusting it in Brandon's hole, pumping more cum in him, smearing each wad with his thrusting cock, coating Brandon's tunnel. Eli pulled his spent cock out and twisted around on the bed quickly, seeing Brandon was ready to cum and he didn't interfere with him, let him stroke his cock with his hand moving up and down fast and hard, and Eli moved over it, watched the cock swell up, the head flare wide and he opened his mouth and captured the first two wads as they flew out of Brandon's cock. He savored the taste of Brandon as he watched Brandon slow his stroking, his hand and cock slick and wet with his cum, spatters of cum covered his stomach, and Eli moved over him, dragging his tongue through the warm cum, licked it up, cleaned Brandon's stomach. Then he took the softening cock and sucked the cum off of it, took Brandon's hand and licked each finger clean, sucking them into his mouth. When he was finished he turned and saw Brandon was watching him, his expression calm and relaxed. Eli wondered what he was thinking, if he still had doubts or fears, but then he saw Brandon smile, almost ready to laugh.
"You nasty motherfucker" Brandon cried out, "the way you licked my hand clean!"
Laughing and rolling around on the bed they wrestled till their exhaustion made them settle down and as Eli spooned up to Brandon, who was staring at the ceiling looking content, asked Eli if he could stay the night.
"Well fuck yeah, you have to cook me breakfast in the morning."