This isn't an endorsement of Gregg Homme underwear. They're probably overpriced tiny pieces of spandex into hugging cock and ass just right. Wait, I like hugging cock and ass just right, too. Guess I better change my name to Gregg Homme.

These are mini-movies which basically look like UK Naked Men videos minus the ejaculations but plus some cleverness. And they are unairable except on late night TV in Amsterdam.

Why can't CBS air a Gregg Homme Fashion Show in prime time like they do the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show? I mean doesn't society objectify men just as much as it does women? Aren't male underthings marketed to men just as much as women underthings? And what the hell is an underthing?

Well, nah, I guess to even out the objectification, either people will have to objectify women less or men more. Since the former is impossible, I'm going to go with objectifying men more. I suggest you do your part.

And that extends to ogling dudes in the locker room to the point they notice. I totally get that their are all these apps that supposedly do the work for us. Tap "woof" or "oink" or swipe right or whatever the app calls it and you've flirted, right? Well hell no you haven't. Flirting is about being vulnerable, obvious and direct. You have to break through all that clutter, and nowadays have to get the attention of people who are just not as into real time flirting as they used to be.

So dress (and undress) to see and be seen. Apps are a good addition to connecting with guys but not a replacement for eye contact, not a replacement for a well-timed hungry gaze. Now that I think about it sexy underwear will never go out of style, especially the wonderfully super gay kind. But if you don't dig these kind of undies, just pull the waistband below your balls and slip your jeans or shorts or sweat on over. It's pretty much an instant cock and balls lift. Your crotch will do the flirting for you, especially if you forget to zip up.

As an antidote to the modern high gloss of the Gregg Homme commercials, here's an early '90s one from Australian brand Underdaks. Forgive the graininess but the horny dude who recorded it on VCR then transferred it to digital for YouTube didn't have a 1080p VCR, because it was over 20 years ago. Still a joy.


Tags: (129),


Bookmark and Share

blog comments powered by Disqus