super gay man

Here he comes to save the day. And what global cataclysms will he stop? What crimes against nature will he save humanity from? What fucking good is he at all?

Well, um, he's good at getting semen out of sequins. And he's good at going to the gym (sometimes) and trimming his moustache (always). He's also good at selling homeowners insurance by day and doing outcall massage by night. And he's good at making a fist but not hitting you.

But most of all, he's good at dressing like Raquel Welch.

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