sexy beards

You ever make out with a guy and end up with beard burn after? Or nipple burn if he rubbed his beard on those sensitive nips tips? Or inner thigh burn if, well, you get the picture. That burn, however red, tender and potentially incriminating, is really a badge of honor. So worth it.

Breaking news: a beard isn't going to make an unsexy guy sexy. But it can magnify a guy's sexiness. It so can to the point that it's easy to make up all sorts of adjectives, stories, and secret identities for a guy based on beard alone.

But except for pure beard fetishists (who would fuck beard trimmings or date George Clooney's hairdresser's personal assistant's aunt's son's mailman's cable installer just to get that close to George's stubble), the eyes matter. The face matters. The jawline matters. The clothing, or lack of clothing, matters.

And beards can be cute also. A man with a beard eating a big, messy ice cream cone? Yum! Still it can itch to grow one. Yeah well high heels hurt so just deal with it. Because, sorry about it, but beards are fashion. And a beard doesn't make a guy masculine. Holding a door for you and fucking you in a hallway does.

In a pinch, a beard also makes a great cum rag. Speaking of which, I think cumrag should be a compound word, but Urban Dictionary (the AP Style Guide of filth), has it as two. Oh fuck it. Cumrag! Cumrag! Cumrag! Beards make awesome cumrags! And certain bearded guys fuck awesome.

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