Guy Watching: Bulge vs. Bulge

25 Feb 2016

In what other sport is it acceptable to press the top of one's head against your competitor's crotch? If you guessed chess, you're right!

I would have also accepted the following answers:

  • Doubles tennis (though ore common in the locker room than on the court)
  • Synchronized springboard diving (though only when the two divers totally fuck up and start on the same springboard)
  • Ultimate frisbee (by "accident")
  • Rowing (again by "accident")
  • Baseball (totally on purpose whenever someone slides into home face first)
  • Long jump (but how can a solo sport qualify when this trick requires a head and a crotch? If you jump so far it goes into another time zone so then your face hits your own ass from behind which just true me on this one)
  • Boxing (as in angry Jerry Springer Show audience getting in crazy fights as a vague reflection of repressed homosexuality)
  • Tonsil hockey (not the saying for a blowjob, but when dentists play hockey)

Or just what happens when the two guys in the video do just about anything together, like try on jeans, go grocery shopping, read the newspaper or take showers.

Yes, definitely when they take showers. Make that singular shower. A together shower. They may as well start off laying on the ground though. Which reminds me, I need to invent a waterproof mattress. Wouldn't want the to get hurt in the shower.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go shove my forward into my crotch. Somehow. Hope somebody's watching.