Crying over the Lance Armstrong doping confession? Or maybe gloating over a fake hero being taken down by his own greed and lies? A Manly, Australia, library is reportedly planning to move Armstrong's biographical books to the fiction section. Ouch. That makes it the second Manly, Australia, reference I've heard in my life, with the first being Kristen Bjorn's porn classic Manly Beach. Though no books were used in Manly Beach.

So who will save the day? German track cyclist world and Olympic medalist Robert Förstemann, that's who! At 5'9" and 200 pounds, he sports 34" thighs(!), which have been cited in the press as "freakishly large vein-laden muscles". And cited in the minds of muscle fetishists as an ejaculation trigger.

As for actual sexual contact with this jock beast, go down on him at your own risk. Unless you also have a fetish for vises.

Robert Forstermann (right) vs. Andres Greipel

Robert Forstermann

Robert Forstermann

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